from Lundy Bancroft's "Why Does He Do That" - Daily Wisdom

"....the treatment your partner is subjecting you to is not just "the way it is..." there are kind, loving families. I realize that life isn't like a television show where everyone gets along perfectly. But there are, truly, families that enjoy the great majority of the time they spend together, that laugh and have fun at dinner every night, that go for hikes and picnics together, that cuddle together at night to read stories. Don't give up o the life you deserve....you will find your way to an atmosphere - and a home- of kindness, of mutual appreciation, of tenderness. It's real."

I wept a little at this. I certainly didn't grow up with it, and I see it in others and really want it but don't know how to get there from here. FDS is the way, I think.