Even though ex and I are divorced we spend holidays together with/for the kids. This is our second divorced Christmas and I’m sitting on her couch as I write this. On the best of days it’s hard being around her because I’m still in love with her. I believe she still has feelings for me as well but, as they say, it’s complicated.

She’s had a boyfriend since August and the kids (b,6;g,9) didn’t know about him until two days ago. My son still doesn’t know but the ex just couldn’t wait to tell her. I agreed to not object to her telling the kids in our last co-parenting therapy session. However, I was surprised that she didn’t wait until after Christmas.

A couple hours ago the daughter was upstairs and the son was on the couch watching football with me while ex was in the kitchen cooking. She looks at me and says, “daughter wants to meet him (boyfriend, I’ve told ex I don’t want to hear his name) sometime in February”. I responded and asked if we need to discuss this now. She then stopped.

I may just be being a crybaby. It really bothered me though. To inject something she knows really hurts me into this day. I stepped onto the back patio and sat down so I could calm down (because I really just wanted to go home). When I came back in she asked to talk to me and apologized. We had a good talk and I explained how I’m feeling. The good news is we didn’t fight or have hostility. The bad news is I’m still sitting here hurt. I’m keeping it all inside and not showing it to the ex or kids. It just really hurts. The timing of it all, injecting a new man into their lives, not reconciling with me, etc.