Nothing left

ThisReckless · 2024-05-22T02:42:16+00:00

Ambition is a good word to use. I think Purpose is also a good one. If you feel your purpose is or was, to be a husband and father. Then that is why your drive is gone and you feel like a shell.

No_Pace2396 · 2024-05-18T02:17:11+00:00

How old are your kids?

OctinoxateAndZinc · 2024-05-17T21:23:29+00:00

You have time with you kids and i promise you THAT is going to be worth more to you long term than anything else.

WindowFuzz · 2024-05-17T21:06:04+00:00

What kind of relationship did you have with your ex-wife? If she was domineering and in control, do you think that she had narcissistic traits? If so, it’s quite common for the partners of narcissistic wives to feel drained and empty after the relationship ends.

Reflog1791 · 2024-05-17T20:52:04+00:00

Double down on the good healthy things that improve your life. If you’re doing 25 push-ups in the morning, do 50. If you’re doing 0 push-ups, start now.

When the grind gets tough and you still dig deeper to improve your station in life, the results are glorious.

csbcsu · 2024-05-17T20:48:42+00:00

You just went through the trauma of leaving someone you mutually built a family around, and now you are a full time single parent to not just A child, but multiple children. Your body & mind don’t have space to be productive, proactive, or outgoing. What you’re feeling right now is a completely normal reaction in your circumstances.

I say this because I felt this in a big way when I initially split, plus my ex was gone the majority of the time with work & the guy she was sleeping with at work. Even with one kid (a wonderfully sweet & well behaved child, mind you), I completely burned myself out and felt weak, empty, and fearful of mine and my daughter’s future.

If you’re looking for an answer, you feel this way because you are coming to terms with the feelings you are feeling. If that doesn’t make sense, basically you are accepting the situation and state you are in & that is the first foot forward with progressing out of this shitty situation. You are in the thick of it; it will continue to suck & that hollowed out well of energy & emotions you remember is a long ways from coming back (even if it ever will), but I have found that once I started looking forward to who I WANTED to be versus having to live with my current situation, self improvement followed.

You have the strength & energy to do this, hell you just did a massive amount of self improvement ending your bad relationship for the sake of yourself & kids. Who said you don’t have ambition? That’s more self improvement than many people ever manage to accomplish.

Aggravating_Text956 · 2024-05-17T19:05:22+00:00

List your symptoms. Be more specific so we can offer insight towards each issue. Vagueness will make anything seem overwhelming l. It's not until you break the giant down into it's different parts that you can begin to eat the entire sub piece by piece. Prioritize a quiet moment or two to begin to really start to see what's going on with you. This is the way.

probebeta · 2024-05-17T18:02:15+00:00

I love my kid to death, but if you decide to spend time with them it's hard to find energy left to also deal with ambitions - especially if you want to give it your 100%. This one is hard. It's always a hustle, operating at 150% and doing a bad job at both, or eventually burning out. I'm amazed at some people how they can just decide to cut losses and pursue one way or the other. I'm not there yet.

Haunted-Tank-1943 · 2024-05-17T17:30:22+00:00

Ambition will pick up when you start healing and not emotionally exhauated

krazykanuck · 2024-05-17T17:23:06+00:00

Well, could be any number of reasons. Sometimes people in a high anxiety situations like a bad marriage go through a massive crash after getting out. Theyve been in fight or flight mode for years. Now you need to sort through ALL of that BS that just happened to them and also attempt to move forward. A therapist would most likely help this process.

Equivalent_Rabbit_62 · 2024-05-17T16:45:27+00:00

Maybe you are struggling with depression like me.

CosetteGrey · 2024-05-17T16:41:34+00:00

have you accepted jesus as your personal savior?

KidCamarillo · 2024-05-17T16:15:56+00:00

It sounds like something to talk to a therapist about for sure. Maybe this is a kind of grief for the death of the relationship.

Title	Nothing left
Author	Remarkable_Egg492
Upvotes	25
Comments	32
Date	May 17, 2024 4:03 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1cu8zlr/nothing_left/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/nothing-left.1518756 https://theredarchive.com/post/1518756

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