I'm sorry if that sounds like a dumb question. My ex-husband (15 years, 3 kids) is a narcissist who abused me every which way throughout our marriage. I wish I had heeded the red flags before marrying him, but it's too late for that now. As I reflect on the past, I think about what value he brought to the relationship that kept me in his cycle of torment and abuse. He made decent money and we had everything we needed. He cleaned the house. Sometimes he cooked. Sometimes he seemed caring and loving (but I now know that this is one part of the abuse cycle). My question is, does being an abuser automatically qualify a man as LV? I am not in any way excusing abuse or suggesting that anyone should stay in a relationship with an abuser for any reason. I'm just thinking about what makes a man HV or LV if they have qualities of both. FYI I'm reading the handbook.