How do you respond when a men cancels a date?

bluelightsonblkgirls · 2020-02-20T14:01:59+00:00

I dunno...things happen. I remember back in the days where I plagued by billable hours, I’d have plans set up for weeks and hours before I’d have to cancel because a matter got “hot.” It happens to the best of us, depending on our chosen fields.

If the guy has since apologized profusely and provided alternative dates, I’d go with the flow and take the rain check (but just make sure the date, time and location is one that’s most convenient to you).

greenappletw · 2020-02-20T11:22:22+00:00

I don't have time for last minute cancellations, so I wouldn't bother. Either his work is unpredictable like this and he should have warned you in advance, or he will randomly let you down hours before a date and waste your time and energy. Start as you mean to go on, first impressions, etc.

myousername · 2020-02-20T11:24:12+00:00

Sounds like better plans came up and you were lower priority, sis. Unless he immediately follows up the cancellation by suggesting times to reschedule, he's just keeping you around as a plan B.

purasangria · 2020-02-20T12:11:23+00:00

I'd delete him. Men do this all the time, reserving time on a woman's calendar and then having "emergencies" come up. The lack of apology and the lack of an attempt to reschedule is what tells me this is likely a "future faking" situation.

I'd delete his number and next him.

daglowup · 2020-02-20T11:34:49+00:00

When he asks to reschedule be like “I’m good luv, enjoy”

venomous_g · 2020-02-20T12:24:32+00:00

This was to be a first date so you don’t have a established relationship... which means he hasn’t established a pattern of being reliable and forthright with you. All he’s shown you so far is that he is poor at planning and not considerate of your time. The choice is obvious.

bearded_dragonlady · 2020-02-20T14:09:47+00:00

If they do not suggest other specific times they can meet up, I leave them on read. Because when you think about it, what would be the point of responding? Even with my friends, I don't just cancel plans without suggesting other times

canttouchthisnananan · 2020-02-20T12:15:55+00:00

Thanks ladies! I ignored him for a bit, because I didn’t like how he didn’t apologise and didn’t immediately set a new date. Felt fake, like you girls said! Big chance he had another offer for tonight and decided to go for that one or he’s just flaky.

But he’s now profusely apologising and texting multiple days he’s available. I’m gonna leave him hanging a bit longer and think about it. I don’t like it when a guy cancels on the day itself.

jeanneeebeanneee · 2020-02-20T17:35:28+00:00

He didn't apologize or reschedule. If it were me I'd take that as a sign he wasn't into me and move on. If you want to give him a second chance, up to you, but I would advise waiting for him to ask, plan and schedule. Don't do the work for him.

janeaustenfan99 · 2020-02-20T13:36:18+00:00

If you accept another date, it has to be something nice. In your neighborhood. At your convenience.

turquoiseblues · 2020-02-20T14:47:15+00:00

You can reschedule if you want, but deprioritize him. (Prioritize other dates and events first.) if he cancels a second time, ghost without explanation.

idiosyncraticg1 · 2020-02-20T22:28:35+00:00

If he didn’t reschedule right away, chances are he’s just not feeling the date.

PurblWasp · 2020-02-20T15:08:00+00:00

I feel a guy that was really damn into you would have apologized right away at the very least and thought at least of something like "Hey let's schedule another date later because I really want to meet you."

I'd say be wary going forward at the very least.

glittersparklesglitz · 2020-02-20T13:17:19+00:00

I'm going to disagree with the crowd here and point out that things do happen in life. I've had to cancel dates with men in the past for valid reasons. I would go with your gut and reflect on your interactions up to this point to make a decision.

husheveryone · 2020-02-20T14:35:54+00:00

You 👻. He’s not into you.

Edit: Seriously. That is not acceptable behavior. A HVM would never do this.

responsiblenatures · 2020-02-20T15:50:10+00:00

I've never had this happen without a legit excuse.

I would leave it at "Okay let's cancel then"

See how much effort he puts into rescheduling and be very picky. Don't say it's okay or that it's fine. If he presses you asking "Sorry, forgive me?" Say something kinda cold like "no not yet". Leave it 100% up to him to correct. Don't ask when, decline weekend plans and the first suggestion.

tankkkkkkk · 2020-02-20T16:02:16+00:00

I would reschedule and if it happens again any time soon throw him in the bin.

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