Reminder that a good partner should support you through your bad times as well. How many men drop their wives as soon as it gets bad?

hairwashernova · 2020-09-05T05:27:12+00:00

A few months ago, I got into it with a loser on Reddit about this very topic. I can't remember the entire conversation but the gist of it was that he said he would leave his girlfriend/wife the moment they got sick/hurt. I called him a selfish prick and said that he should tell his future partner so they won't stay with someone like him. He then told me his girlfriend knew this about him and was okay with it. WTF. Even at my worst, I would had never stayed with a guy who would abandoned me as soon as I got sick or whatever. I gave my condolences to his girlfriend for being stupid lol.

Sadly, the majority of men think like this and it's so frustrating to get it across to women that the moment a man tells you he would leave your ass because of something unexpected, YOU NEED TO GHOST HIM ASAP!!! Ugh.

Lavender_flow · 2020-09-05T11:59:57+00:00

Well, he seems like a good partner, but sorry- how the hell does depression have anything to do with going partying every weekend? This story just feels so freaking off to me. I think she is a shithead, leaving 2 kids like that. Nah sis. Many people have struggled with depression, but that is just some next level shit. On FDS we hold men to high standards, so why should she get a pass just because she is a woman?! If a man did this, we would all be crucifying him. I think she is a pos. She literally LEFT her entire family to go binging and partying for a year "because depression"- i just feel GFTO. If I dont accept it from a man, I sure as shit dont accept it from a woman. She had kids to take off. big #NAH from me.

babysoymilk · 2020-09-05T05:15:18+00:00

I've read that men tend to abandon their wives when they get sick, while wives tend to stay. :(

yggiwtmiih · 2020-09-05T13:42:32+00:00

Nah. Depression/illness and seeking treatment is one thing but abandoning your family to party every weekend is not admissible.

If the situations were reversed I wouldn't be staying. She had a mid-life crisis and abandoned her husband and two young children to wait it out while she went partying and handled her problems with drinking like a teenager.

She is an adult and has to be accountable for the responsibilities in her life just like any man. It's very nice of her husband to stay but this woman is selfish, LV, and a neglectful parent.

Orphanedpinkpetals · 2020-09-05T16:33:43+00:00

I would not support the man if he did this to me.

I would only reconsider taking him back under certain conditions like getting therapy WITH our children. He would need to heal our children from the trauma he caused!!!!!!!!

Gourmay · 2020-09-05T09:43:01+00:00

My HVM partner of 6 months just started therapy for past trauma he doesn’t feel capable telling me about right now. He was sexually harassed recently by a male childhood friend which I think brought it up to the surface. It’s been very difficult watching him shut down (he tries to go through the motions of our relationship but mentally I can tell he’s not there). If you have any advice I trust you ladies way more than the relationship subs..

madeyoulurk · 2020-09-05T17:33:27+00:00

As someone who has struggled with mental and physical health issues, this honestly made me cry my eyes out (with the help of PMS, of course). In my last LTR, I had a tumor in my breast and went through a few months of pure hell. What did my (now EX) LVM do at the time? Fucked someone else. Then, what does this absolute garbage human do? Blamed it on my sickness. “I was afraid you were going to die!” So, I see. You are that much of a manipulative, narcissistic child that you expect ME to comfort YOU, while I’m sick? GTFO.

What FDS has taught me is that this is more common than not. I left that day, only took the essentials, blocked and never looked back. Normally I would have resorted to alcohol, drugs and sleeping with LVM to prolong dealing with it. Not this time. I lived in the pain. Processed it. And it manifested into a life I can be proud of.

I made a list of everything I said I was going to do in that sham of a relationship and DID. IT. ALL. Got back into therapy, lost weight, absolutely killing it in my career, doing my own side projects, working with charities, traveled to other countries, learned how to play drums, became a better friend/daughter/niece/sister/boss/human. It’s been two years and every day I just keep adding more to the list. And will continue to do so. If you can’t have my back in the most difficult of times, you don’t deserve me at my best. Period. It’s a nice daily reminder.

Sorry if this was a bit off track, but it honestly felt cathartic to share. I know I’m a newbie, but long time lurker, and I can’t begin to tell you all how much you’ve helped me. Thanks for reading. ❤️

sunset74420 · 2020-09-05T13:49:01+00:00

Not only that, I am curious as to how LVM CONTRIBUTE to those very same health problems that they leave the women for?

Title	Reminder that a good partner should support you through your bad times as well. How many men drop their wives as soon as it gets bad?
Author	hellau1234
Upvotes	197
Comments	44
Date	September 5, 2020 4:41 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/imv4my/reminder_that_a_good_partner_should_support_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/reminder-that-a-good-partner-should-support-you.212786 https://theredarchive.com/post/212786

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