Hi ladies,

Thought I’d share my experience and something I’ve also learned from true crime ( I commented this advice on the Tinder Swindler post but thought I’d also share it here.

If you first meet someone (especially in a romantic capacity) and they are very open about how wealthy they are. See this as a red-flag.

This openness can take the form of openly discussing wealth, flexing on social media and lavishing you with gifts and experiences.

I once went out with a guy called James and on our 1st date, he told me how his father owned a big construction company in the north and this made him wary of dating. I was naive at the time so I nodded and said we could go 50:50 on dates as I wasn’t looking to be a kept woman. We then talked about attending private schools and how that had shaped us.

On our second date it started chucking down with rain so we grabbed an uber. In the uber, he took out his phone and asked if I minded him sorting out some business. He then explained to me how he had built a company and sold it to a major bank and now needed to move the money offshore. I remember sharing a look with the uber driver in the mirror as he said this.

But stupidly I continued to see him. On our 4th date, his Amex declined and he claimed his crazy ex was committing fraud on it and would I mind paying the bill.

I picked up the bill for the next two dates, with him promising to pay me back.

He then invited me to his Godson’s christening and said he’d booked us room at an exclusive hotel for the weekend. But the night before we were due to go down, he claimed the father was in a&e so the event was cancelled. At the same time he had begun to neg me about not being ladylike and how I swore too much for such an educated woman.

After just two months of dating he asked me to move into his riverside apartment which he claimed to own. I was hesitant as I’d previously had a failed engagement. He then asked if it was about the rent. I laughed and asked why he was going to charge me rent and he admitted the apartment was rented.

I broke up with him immediately. And my FBi bestie messaged the ‘crazy ex’ who spilt the tea about him ‘borrowing’ 50k from her family as seed capital for his business but spending it all on himself. Money she was trying to get back through small claims court. And that he hadn’t gone to private school but pretend to in order to find out if people had family money.

Did he even have a godson? Who knows? He only got a few hundred out of me, but my blood runs cold at how he could have played me had I loved him.

Always remember the truly wealthy are quiet about it. Talk of finances to early on is a redflag.