The importance of being clear with/having boundaries

GigaKarenEnergy · 2021-09-26T02:28:06+00:00

I’ve had a similar experience where a guy friend or even acquaintance that I got too chummy with. They think I have ulterior motives when I was just trying to be friendly or have fun in the moment by joking around. Like OPs friend, I was to chicken to let them know I wasn’t interested or even ghost because I felt too guilty.

LittleSnackPack58 · 2021-09-26T05:15:17+00:00

Woman: breathes

Scote: "Yeah, she definitely wants to fuck me."

Determinedblonde · 2021-09-26T06:43:07+00:00

She’s smart and practising self preservation

Equal-Ear2312 · 2021-09-26T06:48:06+00:00

she was like a bro.....

I died............................

Platipus6 · 2021-09-26T02:54:02+00:00

Interesting. Looks like fawn-zone. The survival instinct "tend and befriend" or fawn to your parents to try to earn their love or lower their rage by being pleasant, subservient, friendly, no problem, chill, cool, have no needs, have no boundaries.

I suspect a lot of creepy or unattractive dudes whine about this one as the friendzone, when we're just trying to avoid escalating his interest, make ourselves sexually unattractive by bro'ing out, and delay a firm rejection that will trigger his NiceGuy rage.

But a neglectful childhood where you're not allowed to have boundaries usually leads to being preyed on before you can explore your own sexuality and learn your preferences regarding men, in a healthy way. You never learn how and when to flirt, or what power you have over men with it. This looks like a very immature attempt at experimenting flirting, with a loser, so he's not teaching her healthy boundaries. In fact he's wading right into her open ones by saying inappropriate shit and not recognizing that she's not normal.

If any of you ladies recognize any of this fawn/flirt behaviour, do a deep dive on your teenage years. I'd like to write a bigger post on this.

Flirting with the wrong man could lead to terrible things, probably stalking.

xfelugirlx · 2021-09-26T03:11:40+00:00

You are amicable with them and they already think you want to marry them. Omg the audacity, some girls just want friends isn’t that deep

catlady4u · 2021-09-26T03:28:48+00:00

"She sat with me at lunch and laughed at my inappropriate jokes. She definitely wants to fuck me" 🙄 scrotes gonna scrote. They just refuse to see how off-putting their behavior is.

apple_cores · 2021-09-26T03:30:12+00:00

If she’s like a bro then why is he questioning whether she’s a friend or not? Would he be questioning the same thing if she were a male? It’s very obvious she doesn’t see him as anything more than work buddies but he’s trying to read so hard into it. It sounds like he doesn’t have much experience flirting or working with women if he’s questioning this at 29.

sexualfoodpantry · 2021-09-26T07:08:02+00:00

You'd think "unresponsive to texts/phonecall and refusing to meet 1-on-1" would be a clue...

Nope. Unfortunately it's best to be unresponsive to anything beyond work. And even then you can't be sure he'll get the hint.

Winnie6 · 2021-09-26T15:49:36+00:00

Pandering? Scrotes LOVE to think a woman is dEsPRrAte to feed their needy fucking egos. She may have been inviting him to invite her, or she may have just been being nice in the friend zone. But the guy has to publish this for others to see? WT actual F? He sees this as that important? This makes me not want to reach out to any human with balls and a dick forevermore!

Title	The importance of being clear with/having boundaries
Author	GigaKarenEnergy
Upvotes	320
Comments	21
Date	September 26, 2021 2:25 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/pvkwe3/the_importance_of_being_clear_withhaving/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/the-importance-of-being-clear-withhaving.1074261 https://theredarchive.com/post/1074261

Comments