What are some girlfriend benefits?

Applegooglepear · 2020-09-09T17:15:07+00:00

Ladies why are there so many posts mentioning cooking and cleaning as a gf??

not on gods green earth. I will not cook or clean for a bf. He can definitely cook and clean for the both of us though. Helps him build character 🤣🤣

Sage_Planter · 2020-09-09T15:56:59+00:00

Having sex (this is a big one!)
Spending the night together
Going on road trips, getaways, or vacations together
Giving small gifts or tokens of affection
Meaningful words of affirmation
Seeing each other more than 1-2 times per week
Being exclusive and not talking to other men
Introducing him to friends and family
Spending your time with his friends and family
Making plans that accommodate his schedule more than yours (but not often)
Giving advice on (and caring about) his problems

Summerisle7 · 2020-09-09T15:56:36+00:00

Being exclusive.
The expectation that you'll always be available on weekends, etc, so he doesn't need to still ask for dates and respect your schedule.
Cooking and housework.
Other favors such as picking up from airport, collecting mail etc.
Being his default plus-one for his friends' weddings or whatever. Being expected to make nice with his family, spend holidays with them etc.
Sharing money or making joint purchases no matter how small. He shouldn't even know how much money you make, until there's commitment.

One that I fell for in the past, was allowing talk about marriage and forever together stuff, before he'd done the step of actually asking me to be his girlfriend. Future faking it's called here. Don't plan a wedding or a home together unless you're actually engaged. Don't talk about engagement until you're actually committed. Never let him skip a step!

EDIT: Actually now I think about it, I'd say that things like everyday cooking, housework, and joint purchases are too much for even a girlfriend to do for her boyfriend. Those things should be saved for true commitment aka a ring on your finger.

WildTenderness · 2020-09-09T15:53:21+00:00

I don't think there's a long list, but what mainly comes to mind is:

Exclusivity, aka she stops talking to other guys
Companionship
Semi-obligation: when not exclusive, you don't owe him shit. When in a relationship, basic things like responding in a timely manner and making time for each other is expected
The opportunity to build physical/sexual intimacy, but remember the 3 months rule!

Moira_Spice · 2020-09-09T20:08:51+00:00

This is my personal list, and this applies to me, but you can adapt to your particular situation:

DATE BENEFITS:

My presence
Some attention
Dates 1-2 times a week, not more. Not more than 3-4 hours per week per man
If I really like the man, light kissing (no French kissing)
Non-sexual hugs (I don't give them to anybody else even friends, and I have to like you)

GF BENEFITS:

Exclusivity. Aka I don't go dating other men, but I keep contact with my male friends.
A bit more time together
Sex (after a while we go all the way)
Staying overnight his place
A little bit of cooking, very minimal.
French kissing
Can help you out a bit, but NO MONEY. I can drive you somewhere if you really do need it, or if you're stuck big time, I'm coming to help you out. But to clean and do laundry for you? No.
Travelling

for me it's very important the man pulls his weight, so if I notice he's letting me do everything it's a red flag.

FIANCEE BENEFITS:

We can move in together (I keep my own place), hence easier access to me. (I keep my own private life, alone time, I go see my friends even if I live with him.)

WIFE BENEFITS:

Blowjobs
Can help out financially fully, shared expenses, shared bills.
Can co-own together a house, car etc.
More elaborate cooking.
I give more thought in the stuff I do for you.

blueveinnoble · 2020-09-09T18:53:52+00:00

Ladies, allot of these posts are mentioning:

-cooking

-cleaning

-being exclusive

-paying attention to his needs

-answering whenever he calls/texts, etc.

I still would define these as at least ENGAGED or FIANCE level benefits.

This is how some of the ladies will fall into the forever girlfriend trap. You basically are doing all the emotional and social support benefits which is like 80%, plus physical benefits like sex & exclusivity?

Just, no. Then he has no incentive to marry you.

Summerisle7 · 2020-09-09T16:53:45+00:00

[deleted]

theawkwardalli · 2020-09-09T15:50:29+00:00

Sex, gifts, etc

Platipus6 · 2020-09-10T00:21:26+00:00

Any one-way giving is a no-no until he's been displaying concrete value and investment.

No giving your time, energy, attention, affection, exclusivity, expertise, labor, mental load, support or money.

No travelling to him (wastes your time)

No cooking, cleaning, laundry, errands, grocery shopping, mending clothes or social secretary duties.

No proof-reading for his job or personal correspondence. No helping him update his resume or encouraging him to look for a better job or to go to school. If he's an ambitionless loser, dip.

No being his +1 to work or social functions to boost his social standing. The only time you're on his arm in public is when he's taking you on a date.

No purchases or suggestions to improve his living space. If he's a "minimalist" with folding chairs and no handtowels, just dip.

Basically he's an acquaintance who takes you on dates until you decide to upgrade him to boyfriend.

rad_sensei · 2020-09-09T20:00:01+00:00

personally i think:

GF: exclusively seeing them (not other men)

physical intimacy and spending the night

giving small gifts

general consideration for their feelings (more than u would have for a friend but not as much as you would consider ur own feelings)

maybe i’ll cook for them (only rarely and bc i enjoy it AND they’re doing the dishes)

small getaways / vacations

meeting my family ————————————————

Wife: All the above plus,

living together

splitting bills / sharing finances (although always have your own private one)

having a kid (if you’re into that, personally i’m not)

planning future with them in mind (giving them almost equal consideration)

big gifts and vacations (but i expect reciprocity)

gcthrowaway2019 · 2020-09-09T18:52:23+00:00

Access to your time and energy on a very regular basis. Like being able to see and be with you every day.

manisfestationqueen · 2020-09-09T15:50:01+00:00

-being available any time to text/talk -cooking for them -cleaning for them -sex -affection such as touching, or hugging -getting to know family -posting about each other on social media

devoushka · 2020-09-11T04:23:16+00:00

Being exclusive
Taking him into account when it comes to weekend plans, holiday plans
Meeting each others families
Being the default +1 to functions
Spending literally any amount of money on him. I'm open to paying for like every 5th date when I'm in a long term commited relationship but when we're in the "talking" stage it's all on him.

Title	What are some girlfriend benefits?
Author	bananachka
Upvotes	42
Comments	51
Date	September 9, 2020 3:46 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/ipif4s/what_are_some_girlfriend_benefits/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/what-are-some-girlfriend-benefits.212439 https://theredarchive.com/post/212439

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