Dating Feminists

thereslcjg2000 · 2020-03-02T23:15:07+00:00

Case-by-case basis for me. Though the power held by the general movement is used more for bad than good IMO, the word means different things to different people. There are plenty of people who aren't especially politically motivated, but call themselves feminists because they believe in equality. I have no problem dating a woman who fits that description.

If you're talking about a hardcore feminist of the variety that constantly complains about the wage gap and mansplaining, that's a no from me.

GaborFrame · 2020-03-02T23:01:38+00:00

Well, I guess most women with a left-wing political stance call themselves feminists these days. We're in a situation where an ideology (feminism) has managed to make itself synonymous with a political goal (gender equality) in the minds of people. Therefore, words do not mean anything. What matters is what they really think.

SamHanes10 · 2020-03-03T02:07:40+00:00

I believe in equal relationships. Most 'actual' feminists, that is those that subscribe to patriarchy theory, expect men to continue their traditional role of protecting and providing for women to make up for all the 'oppression' women supposedly experience. It would not be possible to have an equal relationship with someone like that, so I would not date them.

In contrast, I'd happily date egalitarians, including those that call themselves feminists based on the feminist propaganda that it's about 'treating everyone equally'. (But I expect they will stop identifying as feminists once they become aware that feminism is actually anti-egalitarian).

ur_waifus_prolapse · 2020-03-02T23:40:10+00:00

I don't think labels are a good heuristic for what people actually believe. I've seen my fair share of self-identified empowered feminists who live like traditionalists and vice versa. It would bother me if they identified with a genocidal ideology, but that's the only hard line I draw.

azazelcrowley · 2020-03-02T22:53:02+00:00

Wouldn't date a feminist.

marathon664 · 2020-03-03T00:03:20+00:00

Feminists that align with egalitarian values and have actual concerns and empathy about men's issues but choose to label themselves as feminists are all good by me. Labels are just indicators of values. If you're going to date someone, you should try and figure out their values before taking actions purely on labels.

Cookiedoughjunkie · 2020-03-03T00:50:57+00:00

Male feminists are the worst.

Dunkolunko · 2020-03-02T23:24:41+00:00

Case by case. Most of the them believe part of it at least, so if you cut anyone who either calls themselves feminist or believes something dumb about gender relations there goes 85% of your pool.

thereslcjg2000 · 2020-03-02T23:34:11+00:00

Feminist are no different than any other woman, it's just that most feminist have much lower levels of self-awareness.

I've been friends with feminist type women and when you're in a casual setting where inhibitions are decreased and both parties have had a drink or two, they spout the same things that women who aren't feminist spout. I'd date a feminist, or gladly get to know her and see what happens. It doesn't bother me, everyone has some sort of hangups and the feelings of inferiority and indoctrination that many feminist struggle with are their own unique hangups, no one's perfect, I'm definitely an imperfect man myself.

svalbard5 · 2020-03-02T23:37:22+00:00

Fucking run!

There is little to no chance of you getting out of the relationship with your life.

Retroactive Rape is a real thing for Feminists. You will never be safe

Tmomp · 2020-03-03T04:09:35+00:00

No policy, but in the Venn diagram of three circles of women I'm attracted to, women that are attracted to me, and women who identify as active feminist, however much overlap there is, I'm not sure if I've met the women in that intersection.

DIES-_-IRAE · 2020-03-03T18:29:05+00:00

I just avoid that situation entirely.

I really can't stomach the idea of sleeping next to someone who thinks everything wrong in the world can and should be placed on the heads of men.

Luckily there are plenty of women out there going the egalitarian route and they are not hard to find.

mewacketergi · 2020-03-03T07:02:05+00:00

Case-by-case, since there is much more to a person than holding the "correct" political opinions, assuming she is neither overly hypocritical, not explicitly misandrist.

spudmix · 2020-03-03T00:31:48+00:00

Policies are usually a dumb idea, everyone's an individual and when it comes to something as personal as dating it's easy to assess each person as such. People don't fit neatly into boxes and labels.

orbitaldecayed · 2020-03-03T12:36:00+00:00

Pink Hair: beware.

joeclark5 · 2020-03-03T03:19:16+00:00

It isn't really a problem where I live. I'm a small town that is pretty liberal, but there aren't really many of the stereotypical legbeard type of feminists, at least not middle aged women.

liztu_june · 2020-03-03T20:31:24+00:00

It depends on how conservative there are with male gender roles. Feminist range form rape is bad to all men are rapist.

Asmodaari2069 · 2020-03-04T00:28:33+00:00

I would never date someone who isn't a feminist.

Shared values are really important.

C0dey · 2020-03-04T19:14:37+00:00

Don't really have much of a choice considering that I'm childfree. Not many non feminist women into someone who never wants kids.

LeftNatTay · 2020-03-03T01:07:26+00:00

Only if he's a Marxist-Leninist

heimdahl81 · 2020-03-03T01:03:50+00:00

Every relationship has a few things where you just smile and nod. Feminism is no different. I've been dating a feminist for 8 years. The occasional comment about toxic masculinity or whatever is worth being with a woman who carries her own weight.

chadan1008 · 2020-03-03T10:05:48+00:00

I’m a feminist and I’d feel pretty uncomfortable dating a non-feminist, that’s kind of a dealbreaker lol

eldred2 · 2020-03-03T02:30:31+00:00

Why would anyone date a label? People are complex.

Title	Dating Feminists
Author	J-Unleashed
Upvotes	16
Comments	96
Date	March 2, 2020 10:34 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/fcke05/dating_feminists/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/dating-feminists.1063921 https://theredarchive.com/post/1063921

Comments