A new spin on AF/BB

-CcCc · 2016-09-25T22:32:00+00:00

BB is only bad if the husband wasn't really successful with women in his early twenties. Otherwise it's not a problem. Sure, other men experienced the more aesthetic version of his wife, but he also experienced the more aesthetic versions of some other men's wives.

It's completely normal and fair. However for someone who was incel until 25 or even longer, it's a really pathetic and painful situation. He will forever feel like he was robbed of something.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2016-09-25T21:07:28+00:00

The male equivalent of afbb would be if a man had done all kinds of sweet romantic things for other women when they were younger, taken them on vacations, wrote them songs and spent money on them and didn't do the same for the woman he married

Five_Decades · 2016-09-26T03:07:03+00:00

here are the major issues men face in why they don't want to be BB.

A BB has to admit that his wife, when she had more to offer (was younger, prettier, without kids) gave away sex for free, but she charges Dave for it. Do you like being charged for dented, used goods that were given away for free when they were new?
Dave usually has to support kids that aren't his.
Dave realizes that his wife didn't pick him because she wanted him. She picked him because she needed a backup plan. She would've greatly preferred Chad marry her, but Chad ain't the marrying type. So she settled. Nobody wants to be with someone who thinks they settled, not even Dave the BB.

alreadyredschool · 2016-09-25T20:42:01+00:00

So how disgruntled can Dave really be when his wife fesses up to a wild past? Whether the BB/wife relationship is shitty comes down to both partners sexual experience (whether there's a certain equality) and just accepting that people have a past and not idealizing your partner as virginal being who only started existing when you married him/her.

The difference is in the relative values of sexual access as between men and women.

For women, the most valuable asset they have is sexual access to their bodies. So if a woman's given it up to lots of men, that means she's devalued sexual access to her own body. it also means that when she finally gets around to offering it to Beta Bob, it's not worth very much.

But sexual access is not the most valuable thing most men have to offer. That's why women really don't seem to care much about whether men have had a lot of sex, or the kinds of sex he had, or how many women he's had sex with. (Except maybe for the gay thing -- that calls his masculinity into question and really has nothing to do with BB, but has to do with masculinity). Most women also don't care a whole lot that he fucked a hooker or two, either, so long as his fucking hookers isn't the entire extent of his premarital sexual history.

It's not about men having a past. It's about the relative values on sexual access.

gavinok · 2016-09-25T20:35:06+00:00

The extra experience would definitely help, but your missing the core of AFBB.

AFBB doesn't mean a woman with a wild past and a conservative husband. It means specifically a case of mismatched expectations. The beta bucks, whether he is very inexperienced, or has some experience, is marrying a woman with a wild past based on the expectation she will do all of those wild sex acts and suck his dick every morning at breakfast. He is under the false idea that he has unlimited access to a wild hot girl for the rest of his life.

Conversely, the woman in question usually doesn't see the extent of this expectation. She lives under a false idea of what her husband is attracted to her for.

alreadyredschool · 2016-09-25T20:49:09+00:00

A different spin AF/BB: Don't start a relationship with women who wouldn't have given you the time of the day when they were younger.

despisedlove2 · 2016-09-26T03:34:09+00:00

But lets change it around a bit. Lets say beta bucks (we'll call him Dave) has seen a few prostitutes in his past or went to Thailand. Lets also say he's had gay sex a few times and a bit of a history that he's not crazy about disclosing.

ITT, let us add some fictional and highly unlikely events to a beta bucks husband's past life, and then play a game of equal equal.

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botchedrobbery · 2016-09-25T20:33:01+00:00

Is he withholding from her in any way?

As to your last question, because many people don't think that way. Don't like it, find someone else.

Talkytalktalk · 2016-09-25T23:46:18+00:00

You're slightly misrepresenting the concept. The concept is that a woman will pursue both simultaneously, making her a two timing ho.

poppyblu · 2016-09-26T00:31:09+00:00

Is It implicit than a woman can't be attracted to her beta husband and they can't have great sex and good marriage? Are RPs saying that any man who is a stable provider is automatically not attractive to women specifically because he's a stable provider? That's ludicrous.

Title	A new spin on AF/BB
Author	monster_strapon
Upvotes	7
Comments	121
Date	September 25, 2016 8:21 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/54gx4t/a_new_spin_on_afbb/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/a-new-spin-on-afbb.272770 https://theredarchive.com/post/272770

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