Do you think significant age gaps between casual sex partners are problematic? If so, why?

Ppdebatesomental · 2022-10-25T12:01:15+00:00

Problematic? As long as everyone is 18+ it isn’t my problem. We had a long time poster here, Salty Bastard, who always said the bigger the gap, the shorter the relationship. I think this is often true.

hungrychick404 · 2022-10-25T18:34:30+00:00

I’ve had some older men casually hit on me, and it still makes me uncomfortable. I hate it when old men want access to my youth. Missed your chance to get with a woman in her 20s a long time ago, buddy

AquaChip · 2022-10-25T12:15:00+00:00

Like many issues in relationships, it’s only a problem if someone makes it a problem.

Life_Level_6280 · 2022-10-25T21:19:23+00:00

Imo people that dislike age gaps. - especially younger woman with older man - are unintentionally misogynists.

‘Oh no a woman is only 21 years old, she cant think for herself yet. A 30 year old will manipulate her!’. A woman can think just fine for herself at that age.

gofigure62 · 2022-10-25T14:58:06+00:00

Depends, older men and women have a tendency to manipulate and gaslight younger people into doing what they want. Young people are dumb and inexperienced so even if they say no or are on the fence about someone, the older person often uses their age as a trump card to get the younger person to do what they want.

A consensual hookup with an older person is different than an older person have emotional and mental influence over a younger person.

I've rarely met anyone hetero or homo that had a positive age gap relationship (serious or casual) that didn't end up fucking them up to some degree.

I've never seen it turn out well, so my opinion of these dynamics is low. And no, my opinion isn't any different with older women and younger men. I've seen many women manipulate young men and ruin their lives the same way that older men do to younger women. The older people in these situations are always usually opportunistic, selfish, and have predatory behavior. I've rarely seen a significant age gap relationship that was healthy and didn't inhibit the growth and opportunity of the younger person.

CimZim · 2022-10-25T11:27:04+00:00

Nobody here will be surprised that I don't think there's an inherent problem. (For newbs, my fwb is 15 years older.) However, there are certainly potential problems, and both people involved should think very carefully about what they want out of the relationship...or for casual sex, what they want out of those experiences. Just because something can be problematic doesn't mean it absolutely will be, if caution and honesty is practiced mutually.

ohdiddly · 2022-10-25T12:00:10+00:00

I don't think the age gap on it's own is problematic. I think other issues can arise as a result of a large difference in age, but I don't think the age gap itself is inherently bad.

Most of the age gap discourse I see just seems like a subtle way of infantilising adult women, since they only ever seen to have an issue with older men dating younger women, not the other way around. It's insulting honestly.

Ainsleygz · 2022-10-25T13:41:56+00:00

No, I used to sleep with guys in their mid to late thirties when I was in my early 20s. They were just the vintage horses on my cock carousel lol

MistyMaisel · 2022-10-25T14:51:21+00:00

Yes, and I would say this is true for both men and women. The idea people just one-night stand with no expectations or get into FWB with no expectations and it's just some robotic genitals pounding against each other is a fairy-tale more than a reality.

The older person has more cunning, more experience, and a greater ability to mold and control the younger person into accepting situations and experiences that they may not want or would not otherwise readily agree to if they were dealing with someone close in age.

This will always be true no matter the length of the relationship or the commitment level. And that makes it problematic. Now, does that make it illegal? No. Just frowned up and shamed against, with, I think, good reason.

You can still do you, but yes, I think it is good society mostly pushes back against this behaviour from older people towards younger people.

PlatypusPolka · 2022-10-25T11:50:29+00:00

I do think so, but it’s not my business who other people have sex with as long as both are legal. I can still find it cringy though.

SmilesLikeMardiGras · 2022-10-25T12:43:37+00:00

I dont give a shit about age gaps. stop falling for womens shrill shit tests online

Impossible_You_8555 · 2022-10-25T11:40:53+00:00

As long as both people are over 18, no.

Not even if its serious. I don't really judge people for being with someone and if they are both happy.

The most healthy relationship with a woman was one who was ten years older than me.

I have a younger friend who is a woman who likes older men.

If the person in the long term/short term who makes you happy is younger or older good for you.

beleidigtewurst · 2022-10-25T13:26:46+00:00

No.

Because stats show such marriages are quite stable.

As far as both parties are adult, it's fine.

The "liberal" pushback against age difference comes from butthurt about human males/females aging differently (in terms of fertility) me thinks. A shameful thing to do, regardless.

waffleznstuff30 · 2022-10-25T15:49:11+00:00

I think barely legal so 18-20 range and you are 30+. It's predatory you know what you are doing. Especially if they are insecure like it's grooming without the legal ramifications. A lot of them just graduated high school so yeah they are kids mostly and haven't had to grow up. In the US they can't drink like it's not worth it.

For me personally I think the minimum I'll go is 5 years younger. I'm 32. So someone 27 is feasible and more realistic.

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Mrs_Drgree · 2022-10-25T11:28:54+00:00

[permanently deleted]

sparklyyblueberryy · 2022-10-26T00:55:42+00:00

Not for casual sex, no. But I mean that's the logic of most men too. A 20 year old woman will have an easy time finding men interested in casual sex, whereas relationship value peaks a bit later.

punk_baby333 · 2022-10-27T05:40:27+00:00

Not necessarily. I think it could be at least a yellow flag if the younger partner is still veryyy young (as in barely legal), but I don't believe it automatically means something sinister is at play.

Once both partners are over ~25, people oughta shut up about the age gap completely tho.

Title	Do you think significant age gaps between casual sex partners are problematic? If so, why?
Author	Bane_Of_Atlanta
Upvotes	6
Comments	45
Date	October 25, 2022 8:22 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/yczh1b/do_you_think_significant_age_gaps_between_casual/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-you-think-significant-age-gaps-between-casual.1136513 https://theredarchive.com/post/1136513

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