Feeling resentful towards the endless objectification women go through

LuckyLittleStar · 2020-07-17T08:10:19+00:00

Removed for text wall.

Poet1869 · 2020-07-16T20:40:54+00:00

If I can add something:

I see this happen frequently in the political realm...we begin to use pronouns in our thought process, and soon we begin to "other" entire groups for the actions of a few.

You have serious problems with the cashier across from work, and a number of co-workers and managers. Mentally name them. It's not "men", it's John, Harry, and James.

This will help keep the issue from being so overwhelming. If the amorphous "men" are a danger or irritant, or what have you, that's mentally exhausting. If you can quantify that experience to distinct people it will mentally be easier to process and handle.

Either way, I'm sorry that is going on around you. It seems like you will have to make a choice at work if you do not have corporate backing...grit it out, leave and try to find new work, or threaten your owner with legal action. As far as the guy across the street, I would tell him if it happens again, you're going to report him.

Mewster1818 · 2020-07-16T20:27:13+00:00

I’ve seen smart, creative, lively women in my life reduce themselves down to nothing but bikini photos of their asses on Instagram because they know it’ll get the most attention.

That's their choice though isn't it? If they want to get attention and use their sexuality to do so, no one is forcing them that's entirely their decision. While that's not something I would do, I don't understand why the implication is that smart or creative or lively women can't or shouldn't desire sexual attention. Or that if they do desire it, it must be because men or society is forcing them to do these things... Doesn't that undermine their free will and choice to insinuate that somehow their actions were forced?

Don't put up with anything you don't want to put up with. It doesn't matter if you have an HR or not, you can still put your foot down and if they don't take you seriously you have a legitimate legal case(guarantee they'll take your seriously then). You don't have to let people involve you in things you find disgusting, be honest and be firm. Being feminine does not mean being a pushover or a doormat for behaviours you do not like.

2020-07-16T23:41:48+00:00

Part of being feminine is demanding to be treated like a lady, with kindness. When someone shows you a ass pic, say "No thank you" and end the exchange. Send the message that the behavior is not acceptable in your presence. Or take your business elsewhere. At work, use the same methods. State for others that you would appreciate them not using certain language in your presence. Try not to use shaming language off the bat. Use expressions that show ot makes the speaker low value, low intelligence and unattractive.

JimiJons · 2020-07-17T03:58:44+00:00

Objectification is dual in nature and is something you'll at least partially have to toughen up about. Hating men for objectifying you makes you ignorant of the fact that you also objectify them, which for most people is by utility and resource wealth. Part of this can be nullified by opening dialogue about the actions you find unacceptable. The other part is nature, and is thus unavoidable.

The things that you're listing here are things you're mostly choosing to be bothered by. Overhearing private conversations between male peers is a choice. If they're being obnoxious, inappropriate, and loud enough that anyone could hear their conversation, that's certainly an issue and you are entitled to either report or confront them, but they otherwise have every right to talk about whatever they so choose without you eavesdropping and policing their tone or language. Would you feel a man who eavesdrops on a private conversation you have with female peers and finds what you said personally offensive has a right to police or attempt to get your employer to police you?

Femininity feels fragile to you because your mindset is fragile. You're allowing insignificant or impersonal things to get to you. The only person who determines the amount of pressure you feel to compete with other women is you, which by the way should be none. You set standards for attractiveness for yourself based on what makes you healthy and happy, and what your s/o responds to. Everything else, the bikini photos, the "fat booties," all the little superficially exaggerated sexual characteristics men will occasionally comment on, are nothing more than the hamster spinning the blue pill wheel.

daffodil-13- · 2020-07-16T19:02:42+00:00

Where do you work in this day and age where the guys are talking TO YOU about wanting to smash clients? What does HR have to say about the environment you’re working in?

If someone at a convenience store stopped to show me ass pics I think I’d be on the phone with the Fuckin’ Weirdo Hotline. How did that happen? You bought a Vitamin Water and he passed back his phone?

Is it possible that some of this is a little bit of an inner, self-esteem issue and a little bit of confirmation bias is making these things seem ‘bigger’? Has your own self-care suffered lately? Maybe take a social media break, cut back on the “building a home”, “hearth-wife” aspect of things and start doing things that just make you feel attractive, carefree, and feminine. Not “performatively”, but stuff you actually enjoy.

scaevities · 2020-07-16T22:16:12+00:00

You should probably have conversations with your boyfriend about watching porn.

cherrykitty87 · 2020-07-17T02:01:03+00:00

I, too, feel this way sometimes. Glad I'm not alone on this!

What helps me is remembering that men are a certain way for a reason just like women are a certain way for a reason. We are both complex and we will never fully understand each other. Personally, I see it as teams. There's a men's team and a women's team. They think about and play the game differently to win or get advantages, it's fun sometimes but sometimes you get hurt. You win and sometimes you lose. I am, however, not saying that men are our enemy or opponent, even though it feels this way sometimes. That's just how I see it.

2020-07-16T20:39:13+00:00

Don't let men rope you into these disgusting conversations. Call some managers or get in touch with Human Resources. You don't have to be the Cool Girl who laughs about their sexist jokes. You need to speak up for yourself and stand by your convictions.

I still have to deal with the occasional heartache of my boyfriend watching porn.

I feel like you're burying the lead here. If his porn usage makes you uncomfortable, speak up about that, too. No one else is going to champion you, so I'd suggest you learn to do it now.

evelynbigbootybitch · 2020-07-16T21:00:30+00:00

“I hate that I can take care of myself so much, that I love myself, and find myself attractive, yet I still have to deal with the occasional heartache of my boyfriend watching porn.”

I wholeheartedly agree with your statement. I have no idea how to not feel the same as you with learning to love yourself and not compare yourself to other women or feel like you’re not ‘as blank’ as other women. It’s very complicated. Not even sure why I’m responding now, but just letting you know I’m dealing with these same thoughts and feelings. Thank you for sharing.

pearlsandstilettos · 2020-07-17T02:28:19+00:00

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Brokenbyher2019 · 2020-07-16T18:47:41+00:00

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anickel120 · 2020-07-16T23:18:22+00:00

JulianUNE · 2020-07-16T20:39:13+00:00

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RareRedDietitian · 2020-07-16T18:33:52+00:00

I got stuck on the 18 year old you part.....can you get back to her?

Flatwormmm · 2020-07-17T00:55:40+00:00

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2020-07-17T03:53:15+00:00

Im a dude and I feel the same resentment. Im tired of it too.

Flatwormmm · 2020-07-16T22:22:50+00:00

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CalmWalk · 2020-07-17T00:20:48+00:00

From the perspective of a man.

It sounds like you are tired if an overly sexualized society. If you work with alot of men. You may feel like this perhaps. I had an ex GF who did housekeeping and the female maids where sleeping with each other in the rooms. I found that to be a bit concerning.

Title	Feeling resentful towards the endless objectification women go through
Author	trophyfriend
Upvotes	50
Comments	98
Date	July 16, 2020 6:28 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/hsf8bt/feeling_resentful_towards_the_endless/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/feeling-resentful-towards-the-endless.714652 https://theredarchive.com/post/714652

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