TLDR: AWALT.

A man is what a man does. Living the practical red pill will cause real-world consequences in your relationships and worldview. Do not simply agree intellectually while maintaining plugged-in behaviors.Test her rigorously.

Lurker here.

I've been folliwing the Red Pill reddit for a year now as one of those guys who reads about the tribulations redditors experience while plugged in, and thinks "I'm special, I'm different, that will never happen to me." The myth of exceptionalism based on the narrative of individualism - how everyone is unique, just like everybody else. How everyone is the star of the movie of their life.

But I took the plunge today, told my fiancee I think we should break up. Partly to test how strong the 'love' is (how much of an exception to AWALT she was), but mainly because I had a gut feeling that I was in for an extremely unfulfilling marriage ahead. And the pressure of all the expectations on me, in contrast to her waiting for me to White Knight at every chance, with no reciprocity on her part, seemed ridiculous.

So now the test: I call her and tell her we are breaking up. The correct response for her would have been to require an explanation, at least to express or feign sadness. To put up a damn fight for the relationship if she is as special as I figure. You know if she doesn't even try to salvage the relationship, it means she's already swinging onto the next branch.

Instead of asking why a breakup crossed my mind, she took the chance with both hands and ran through the open door without one backward glance. There was even an unchecked note of enthusiasm in her voice that confirmed my suspicions that her loyalty was shifty at best.Her promises were a blast of pledges doomed to be rendered invalid the instant another man comes along. It was a confirmation that all my defiant betatude served to secure her in hypergamy even at the cost of my sanity as I surrendered myself entirely into her frame. She was willing to keep up the gimmick of a working relationship, parasiting my own gullibility, at least until the moment was right to leave.

Ordinarily this discovery would not have surprised me knowing what I know of TRP, but because I had made a mental exception for her, my shields were down. Her reaction blindsided me as if I was an ignorant beta all over again. I was no longer ahead of the game.

I don't know whether to celebrate my newfound freedom or to thrash myself for fooling myself that acting bluepill while knowing the red pill work better.

Take the plunge, test her with a relationship-endangering test. See her reaction.

If she fails, good riddance.

If she passes, test her again.

Off to the gym I suppose.