Basic question; She rejects your advances. You still see her in social circles. How do you act?

centurijon · 2013-08-22T20:43:42+00:00

Give no fucks.

You are who you are regardless of whether she rejected you or not, so why treat her any different?

Don't continue to pursue her, but still treat her as a friend.

puaCurveBall · 2013-08-22T20:30:29+00:00

Treat her exactly the same.

Getting rejected should not be a big deal, or even a little deal. You were interested, she wasn't... that is the end of it.

dem0nhunter · 2013-08-22T21:27:11+00:00

Social value is your friend.

If she's not interested move on to the next one. But stay in touch with her and keep her around. She will passively help you to progress with others.

1vibe · 2013-08-23T03:55:15+00:00

Act like you already fucked her, and it's no big deal.

phtls-2014 · 2013-08-22T20:32:07+00:00

I would continue on with life like nothing happened. It makes thing s weird if you change your personality towards them just for rejecting you at the time. Who knows maybe they'll change their mind some day.

air139 · 2013-08-22T23:11:27+00:00

Treat her like a human? I guess I don't understand the question, if she doesn't want to date you, do you really think it's okay to punish her?

allex8800 · 2013-08-22T20:46:53+00:00

Same as what everyone else says, even being willing to turn it into an inside joke between the two of you.

kingcal · 2013-08-23T02:31:22+00:00

Treat her like a friend. I just got rejected last night. I made out with a girl in a bar and set up a Day 2. I went to hold her hand, and she said we should just be friends. Shrug it off. Invited her to come see me do some comedy on Sunday. It's no skin off my nuts. I barely know her and she barely knows me. It's not like I harbored feelings for a year and got invested and had unrealistic expectations. Her rejection doesn't reflect anything about me. It just means that for whatever reason she wasn't feeling it. It could be any of a million reasons.

2013-08-23T04:46:23+00:00

Don't strain yourself to look "cooler" than you were when she rejected you. If you've handled the rejection properly, then you are already a step closer to being twice the man you were before.

THEMACGOD · 2013-08-23T06:41:23+00:00

Aloof as fuck...

leodoestheopposite · 2013-08-22T21:52:19+00:00

Business as usual. Nothing important ever happened, if she or anyone else brings it up, you don't remember.

Shmishma · 2013-08-23T07:12:47+00:00

Immediately get involved with other women, stay active in the game. For me it's the only thing that legitimately takes my attention off of a woman. Plus this might then attract the original one who rejected you.

itsmevichet · 2013-08-23T13:42:22+00:00

Act like it's not a big deal, because it's not. You asked her out, you didn't ask her to marry you.

Be polite. Don't orbit (she's got nothin' for you). Be the fun guy who people like to hang out with.

2013-08-23T16:41:18+00:00

give no fucks and pay her no heed. be polite and courteous, never go out of your way to be a dick to her or ignore her, but do not go out of your way to be her friend either. keep it at aquantinces and keep it polite.

reezyreddits · 2013-08-23T21:02:34+00:00

It depends on why she rejected you though. Maybe she's talking to plenty of guys at once and doesn't want to commit. Maybe she doesn't "realize" how awesome you are because she's shallow or a bitch. Either way, only be spiteful if she was rude or cocky about rejecting you. Show rude and cocky girls that they are not the shit. If she's just a normal girl and she wasn't feeling you then no harm no foul, I've been rejected by a few girls that I bagged like even 3 years after the fact. Don't give up hope. Rejection doesn't have to be forever. "you can't get out of the friendzone" is a damn myth. You just gotta bring something new to the table to attract her.

lasagnaman · 2013-08-22T22:32:16+00:00

Be normal around them? They are your friends, after all.

Naa2078 · 2013-08-23T00:04:42+00:00

Be friendly. Just stop focusing on her. Trying to play her or be patronizing will just make you look like a bitch ass punk.

Hansmuh · 2013-08-23T00:01:42+00:00

You are outcome independent! That is a basic rule, don't you know?

eablokker · 2013-08-23T05:02:44+00:00

Everyone here is saying to pretend to be unaffected by it. This is bad advice from a psychological point of view. You can't suppress your emotions without suffering psychological consequences down the road. Whether you pretend to go on like nothing ever happened, or you ignore her, or keep playing her, they are just all different forms of suppressing your feelings. The only thing to do is don't hide from her how your feelings were hurt by her. Be vulnerable. Let whatever emotion you have be shown, tell her how it made you feel when she "rejected" you. This is also the hardest solution to do if you're not used to being vulnerable. It's possible that she didn't know that she was rejecting you, or that you felt rejected. Rejection and the interpretation of rejection takes on many forms.

occupykony · 2013-08-22T22:11:04+00:00

Like everyone is saying, it's only a big deal if you make it out to be. To give you a very recent example from my own life, I made a play for one of my coworkers on the weekend. It didn't work out, but next time I saw her (at work two days later) we were very quickly back to bantering, flirting and our standard dynamic. Even ended up going for coffee with her later that afternoon. Don't take it personally and act like you don't, and everything will be fine.

zomgitsduke · 2013-08-23T01:19:13+00:00

Just act as if nothing happened. Pretend it didn't crush you, it will show her that her rejection didn't mean the world to you.

Might get her thinking.

Heflar · 2013-08-23T03:05:46+00:00

be the better person and do not be affected, there are always more options, personally i like to stick away from my friends, or friends of friends

Futchkuk · 2013-08-23T04:01:08+00:00

A lot of it depends on context and her attitude, if she acts distant she probably needs some space for a bit. Be social just don't push. If you were close friends before she may just want to go back to the way things were before, so just act as you did before.

Banana_Slut · 2013-08-23T04:19:36+00:00

She rejects your advances. Move on. Find another girl who will and walk into your social circle with your arm hooked in hers.

Tickler3 · 2013-08-23T09:19:33+00:00

Basic question; She rejects your advances. You still see her in social circles. How do you act?

Normal, like nothing happened.

What you need to realize is that just because you have intense feelings (love, hate, attraction, etc...) for a girl doesn't mean she is going to have those feelings for you. So while it may seem like the end of the world to you that she said no, to her you were just another guy who asked her out and she said no to. After that, you can just keep being herself and maybe she will come around, and maybe she won't.

Just be nice, don't be a weirdo, and don't look like you are trying to run a "game," because girls can tell.

2013-08-23T14:26:34+00:00

If you got in the friend zone it was your fault.

Why punish her?

You get in the friend zone by being passive... once you're there give up on dating her, most women don't let you out of the friend zone.

SupALupRT · 2013-08-23T19:41:22+00:00

ignoring them is immature. Just treat them as a friend. Being around cute girls is social proof, other cute girls will see cute girls hanging around you and it shows you are not socially retarded.

drexlspivy · 2013-08-22T23:32:04+00:00

Remain unflappable. If you take this rejection like an adult and move on as if it never happened, she might think better of you. Perhaps she might recommend you to her other girlfriends as a mature guy.

pimms4london · 2013-08-24T00:42:50+00:00

Easy: like it never even happened. Been there 1000 times. Sometimes I've even been the one who rejected the advances and you do the same thing. Forgdidaboudit. No one gives a fuck.

Title	Basic question; She rejects your advances. You still see her in social circles. How do you act?
Author	piperson
Upvotes	58
Comments	48
Date	August 22, 2013 8:24 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1kwbcg/basic_question_she_rejects_your_advances_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/basic-question-she-rejects-your-advances-you-still.1295205 https://theredarchive.com/post/1295205

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