[deleted by user]

Elbynerual · 2021-09-21T23:39:06+00:00

This post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person. While Field Reports deal with specific situations and people, remember that the focus is different:

A field report explains a lesson learned or demonstrates a Seduction concept.
If the point of this post is asking how to get that specific girl, it belongs in AskSeddit.

No worries though! Though the thread has been taken down, any conversations you have started here can still continue, and if you want to PM a mod to get their opinion on this thread, feel free to do so and they will still be able to weigh in.

For next time, remember that posts about a specific situational advice with a specific person are fine as field should be directed to Ask Seddit (/r/askseddit), not to be confused with Ask Reddit.

swing39 · 2021-09-21T08:13:23+00:00

Have you considered counseling?

Bryn79 · 2021-09-21T16:02:01+00:00

Honeymoon is over, now things get real.

Your wife now sees you as you are, not through the hopped-up love juices she used to have.

There is no going back, only forward or apart.

You were fortunate to get a pass for nearly two years but now the real work of a relationship begins.

You need to get to know your wife as she is now. This isn’t the time to whine that she doesn’t love you like she used to because she never will again.

She can learn to deeply love, respect and admire the man you are or can be … if you have that capacity and willingness to be that man.

Take your wife on a date … get to know who she is and wants to be. Figure out how to facilitate that while also being your own self.

Easy street just ended … welcome to all the bumps in the road you now get to navigate.

If you don’t know how, get help.

silc789 · 2021-09-21T08:49:32+00:00

There's a saying that passion in a relationship is put to test around the 2 year mark. Something about the literal chemistry and attraction dying around that mark, don't quote me on this but here have been studies implying it happens. Which means having kids within 2 years is extremely risky.

Better just have a direct conversation with her.

Jay-Ames · 2021-09-21T15:33:23+00:00

Marriage kind of fucked up things for you. You are married now so she no longer has to put effort into keeping you. You will be there no matter what she does.

Giving her all the flowers in the world and everything else she wants won't work. Being sweet to her won't work. It just confirms what she already knows. She's got you and she is bored of you.

You need to become a challenge to her again. You do that by becoming the man that other women want to date. And by one that doesn't take any shit from her.

Becoming attractive to other women is not the same as making her jealous. That won't work. It will just make you look weak.

Work out. Focus on what you do as a man. Look the best you can be. Be the charming. Be a bit of a bad boy disguised as a good guy. She will start to feel that she can lose you. That is when psychology kicks in. We all want what we can't have.

It is very important that you are not phased by her actions until she does something wrong.

I give this type of answer often. And often I get down voted. Mostly by men and women that do not understand female psychology or try to be politically correct.

But I am 100% right in this so I hope you at least take my advise under consideration.

dontbanmeagaindudes · 2021-09-21T10:59:00+00:00

Excuse me let understand something.

Two years as a serious relationship and then you guys got married?

There's other important thing, you got her pregnant and now has two kids, she doesn't want to reproduce with you anymore and her mindset drastically changed to being a mother.

SpecialPowerss · 2021-09-21T08:05:00+00:00

Have an open, transparent, candid conversation with her to see if her feelings have waned. Decide if you need to get a divorce.

akat36 · 2021-09-21T12:21:46+00:00

I think you're on the wrong subreddit . Speak with her bluntly. That doesn't work see a couples therapist.

wallynext · 2021-09-21T11:40:03+00:00

A broken home is a home were the two parents can’t communicate, not where there is only 1 parent, better to have just 1 than to have 2 toxic ones. She has responsibility in the relationship as much as you do, and communication is key, if she can’t communicate her problems and the fact that she went cold then this relationship is doomed, don’t try to save something that the other person isn’t willing to save as well

cptndv23 · 2021-09-21T18:11:29+00:00

Work on yourself and let her catch you taking really great fucking care of yourself. Hit the gym. Trust me.

mabden · 2021-09-21T12:13:04+00:00

Check out; The dating dictionary by doc love The married man's sex life primer The sex God method No more Mr nice guy

RuskyLee · 2021-09-21T15:44:26+00:00

Kids growing up in a home with parents that aren't attracted to each other or actively in love is a broken home. Once my parents got divorced, there was so much less tension around. I always wished they have gotten divorced sooner.

mw891011 · 2021-09-21T17:54:16+00:00

A few tips:

Don’t be around her so much, make her miss you

Do things for her without her asking for it, flowers are cliche, but make her favourite lunch, buy her something she loves to eat but wouldn’t normally buy

Ask her out for a date and have a babysitter already lined up

Right now she looks at you as the father of her kids, you want her to look at you like you are a cute guy

MUhholen · 2021-09-21T08:48:37+00:00

read /r/marriedredpill , which can help you

SpookyKG · 2021-09-21T13:16:18+00:00

Your mistake was getting married to a stranger and having two kids with her.

Counseling is your only step.

whiplash81 · 2021-09-21T18:39:29+00:00

You hired a PI because she wasn't obsessed with you anymore? This sounds a bit narcissistic and controlling.

I suspect there's more to this story that you aren't telling us.

Also, this is probably not the best subreddit for marriage advice.

TheTruth221 · 2021-09-21T09:09:20+00:00

sounds like she got used to u

try being distance to win her back

DubDeuceInThisBih · 2021-09-21T11:43:49+00:00

Listen to Patrice O'Neal. Also, why would you do it in these days? They literally get rewarded for leaving.

dragonforcingmywayup · 2021-09-21T14:13:33+00:00

No one mentioned this. But do you help her with your 2 kids? Maybe her being a mother has become a distraction and/or resent you for not helping.

This is the wrong subreddit for this btw

hardpaint3 · 2021-09-21T18:30:01+00:00

Fuck other girls make more money

Limitlesspappy · 2021-09-21T21:16:46+00:00

Counseling not needed. My man be an alpha. Make her believe that you have options. You gotta make her feel fear of losing you because you’re desired by other women. If you’re not physically fit already— get fit. Change your clothing style a bit. Get a different haircut. Let your beard grow or shave it all of. Pivot. Do the opposite. Get hungrier for work and wealth. Be a good father… take your kids to a nice place. You gotta be that father alpha figure my man. I cheated on my ex fiancé and I got her back by changing who I am. She had lost all respect for me but after finding out I have options… she inexplicably started feeling attraction for me again. Wish you all the best!

MO_drps_knwldg · 2021-09-21T16:04:44+00:00

Just some food for thought. It also isn’t heathy for the kids to grow up in a house where the parents aren’t happy and there’s infidelity or mistrust. Long term relationships are tough, the attraction and affection goes up and down. You should communicate with her upfront and find out what’s going on

seeingred81 · 2021-09-21T21:09:16+00:00

Read Married Attraction Plan and/or Married Man's Sex Life Primer. Has anything significant changed in her life our your life?

Tinal85 · 2021-09-21T21:39:17+00:00

How old are your kids? Having children can really kill your libido. Are you very hands on with the kids? Kids are exhausting if you are not helping raise your kids and she is doing the majority of the child rearing then her loss of libido can be caused by exhaustion. Also resentment. How were you when they were newborns and had to be fed every 2 hours? Were you helping? Doing diapers? Actively engaged? I have friends who very much resent their lazy ass husbands from this time period and it basically destroyed the marriage. Even the most rock solid of marriages can be trying during this time. Take a good look at how you are contributing to the family and see a marriage counselor. I can tell many of the people in this thread do not have children because something similar to this should be the top comment not some bullshit about her not needing to try anymore. The poor woman is probably working herself to exhaustion, barely eating, sleeping, hair falling out (I've heard it time and time again), and then the husband whining and confused about why he isn't getting laid.

johker · 2021-09-21T22:00:33+00:00

Might want to look into Kareeza and/or read Cupid’s poisoned arrow.

Sounds like habituation has taken place and you need more bonding

2021-09-21T22:58:46+00:00

Counseling ASAP.

TheSunshineMan · 2021-09-21T23:24:28+00:00

r/deadbedrooms has a lot of great info

ORIONFULL23 · 2021-09-21T23:34:52+00:00

You need to become a hotter man, give her space focus on your things, but if you notice that this isn't working forward, you should end it

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	56
Comments	61
Date	September 21, 2021 7:43 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/pse2wv/deleted_by_user/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1275755 https://theredarchive.com/post/1275755

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