How do you not become bitter?

SalesAficionado · 2022-09-27T02:13:17+00:00

The alternative to stop approaching women and interacting with them is you get nothing. The universe does not care about you. No one cares about you getting laid or not. So you have 2 options. You either put in the work with the cards you’ve been dealt with or you do nothing (and get nothing).

Delicious_Ad_1853 · 2022-09-27T02:05:01+00:00

Bitterness is the opposite of gratitude. To fight it, you gotta embrace the things your thankful for and strive to see life in a more positive light.
You wouldn't be here and you wouldn't be so frustrated if dating wasn't important to you, so don't entertain those "it isn't worth it" thoughts. That's just an ego defense mechanism speaking. It is worth it and you will succeed... if you focus your energy in the right direction.

mgarro385 · 2022-09-27T02:47:46+00:00

Are you working on your game with approaching and interacting with women? Or just working out?

TLDR21 · 2022-09-27T02:58:55+00:00

Don't waste time talking to 100's of women do something you love, probably equal chance of meeting a quality woman if you take up a social hobby.

elizabethmar · 2022-09-27T03:07:29+00:00

have you considered that your bitterness is what’s sending the ladies away

Contango6969 · 2022-09-27T02:29:08+00:00

Only you can say if the juice is worth the squeeze. If you haven’t fucked any hot girls or had any good relationships then do what you gotta do. Evaluate when you have perspective.

There are better reasons to be resentful than they won’t fuck you without some effort lol

Dangerous_Wasabi_523 · 2022-09-27T06:06:46+00:00

Advice? Shut up and game.

SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. AND. GAME.

PugsleyAdams4 · 2022-09-27T07:08:24+00:00

Jesus, what a load of bullshit. You could also be a short ugly fat Russian man stuck in a freezing trench somewhere in Ukraine jerking of into mud waiting to die. Slap yourself and get off your ass. Do something about your problems or stay home and shut up.

Nullroute127 · 2022-09-27T05:17:03+00:00

It sounds to me like you're hoping for too much at once. Also, that you've convinced yourself that you're not attractive to anyone without any concrete basis. You haven't tested your theory enough times to come to a conclusion.

I'm 5'8, half asian/white, some muscle, but higher bodyfat than I'd like. I don't have an issue pulling girls I'm attracted to. I have more success in person than online. I do have success with OLD, but at this point I've relegated it to something I do on the toilet, in airplanes, riding as passenger in a car, etc. VS anything I put serious effort into.

One of the things I've noticed about modern society is that we project onto the other gender what we would want in them. Meaning, women overvalue having a career/job title, degrees, etc. and think that men value those. Men, we assume that women value our looks as much as we do theirs.

I'd say that on the average, women care significantly less about looks than men. They care much more about the emotional experience you can give them, and value such as your intellect, security, resources, status, etc. There are absolute OGRES of men out there dating dimes.

That said. I don't know what to tell you other than you can only offer the best version of you - some will take you up on your offer and others won't.

chonglang_gaoshou · 2022-09-27T02:57:23+00:00

How tall are you? I'm 5'6 and I still have casual sex constantly with different girls off Tinder

5_7pickup · 2022-09-27T03:59:08+00:00

You're unhappy about your sex life yet you don't want to put in the effort to improve it...? I don't get the point of this post. You reap what you sow. You're lazy. That's why you don't get laid. Talk about entitlement.

creativedave73 · 2022-09-27T04:00:41+00:00

Being bitter doesn't do you any favors. When you talk to a woman, she can sense your insecurities because of the way you carry yourself and your mind game. You're setting yourself up for failure.

You need to develop a new mindset. Watch movies with actors who are short and not traditionally attractive, but they get women. Make Danny DeVito your new hero.

If women were only attracted to tall, super attractive men, men like Danny Devito would never get laid. Sure, he's a famous actor/producer/director, but there has to be some level of attraction.

There are plenty of nonfamous short, physically unattractive men who attract gorgeous women. Once, I was at a doctor's office and there was a fairly young man in a motorized scooter. In addition to his physical disability, he was average looking and overweight. His gorgeous wife/girlfriend was with him and by all appearances loved him dearly. He seemed like a very positive, fun guy. They were laughing together and holding hands. If I remember correctly they picked up a magazine and read it together. He would make a funny comment about an advertisement or something they saw in the magazine and just start laughing together. It was great to see and gave me ideas for something to do on a date or when I'm in a relationship.

mega_simpppp · 2022-09-27T05:23:46+00:00

Asks for advice on how to not be bitter but doesn’t take any of it. Yeah you’re definitely helping yourself buddy!

zoepaige11 · 2022-09-27T05:21:45+00:00

Ok I know this may be wild to you, but try this approach: 1. Women are for more than just getting laid 2. Try dating ugly & short women, since you are ugly and short yourself.

CaptainSaveBPD · 2022-09-27T05:40:28+00:00

I was never in your situation so I won’t speak from personal experience

I am friends with many people who are short and/or ugly, yet they get laid a lot Personally i would advise you to put excuses to the side and work on everything that you can work on One of my closest friends if 5 ft 6, he has been in many relationships/has been with many beautiful girls (note that im also european, and the average person here is taller than the average person in America) But if you really want to then just work on your status, chances are that’ll bring girls/make it easier with girls due to the fact that girls are attracted to high value men

Ambitious-Ice2357 · 2022-09-27T04:00:06+00:00

You answered your own question in the last paragraph. Keep studying, keep working hard and the juice will squeeze itself.

berttbeans996 · 2022-09-27T05:18:40+00:00

How old are you?

Strawberyblonder · 2022-09-27T05:29:23+00:00

I think you should maybe try a screen fast for a couple of weeks. I glanced through your post history and I feel like maybe you fall into the comparison game unintentionally? Not trying to be cheeky, but you gotta love yourself first. :)

iswear2drunkimnotgod · 2022-09-27T06:12:32+00:00

My boy is short, chubby and funky looking, but has thr confidence of 1000 men and pulls. Where's your confidence? Without it, you have nothing in this game

SwayzoMad · 2022-09-27T06:41:39+00:00

Went through this whole post to see if I can give some new advice but based on your comments I have to ask:

Do you really want help OP?

notaproblem333 · 2022-09-27T06:46:17+00:00

I’ll give you some no bullshit advice:

Travel. Preferably get your ass out of the United States and go to some country where you can be placed at the top of the dating market just by being American ( Thailand, Latin America ).

Stay at the gym. You probably don’t have any real gains to show yet. If you keep at it, women will notice, trust me.

Finally, ignore bad career advice and find a way to actually make bank. It’s not a sin to be rich.

incognito3107 · 2022-09-27T07:15:28+00:00

It's definitely not worth becoming permanently bitter because of it. Dating game is one of the most shallow and rigged things in social life. You should stop exposing yourself to stories about "easy sex", oversexualized women's portraits and putting sexual affairs on life pedestal. You should improve your sexual attractiveness just to attract a good partner for you, that will mirror your sexual dynamics and be a good company for life circumstances. I believe most guys are capable of that, but some struggle too much with breaking seduction code with poor assets, which is definitely a waste of time.

AncientSatisfaction4 · 2022-09-27T07:24:01+00:00

if you're willing to make some big sacrifices to your personal life, there's a few more extreme measures you could take:

Following Peter Thiel's principle of 'competition is for losers' combined with the book 'dateonomics', you can move to countries/cities where you have a much greater advantage:

Many cities around the world have a high female to male ratio, and via supply/demand the "lower status males" are increased in status
The same principle applies to universities where it's 3 women to every 2 men, and is even higher ratios at some schools.
Different countries/states/provinces have different average heights. You could move somewhere where you're the average-above average height
There's hella short babes in certain countries. Going to a country full of short hotties also has the advantage of you being perceived much higher in socioeconomic status, which greatly increases a male's attractiveness
They have surgery that can increase a guy's height one to three inches by stretching the bones in their leg. Not sure what it's like, but it's an option
And, probably the most difficult. But there was a study done where a 5'6" guy was rated in attractiveness by women in comparison to a 6' guy, and it was found that for the 5'6" guy to become as attractive to the women as the 6' guy, he had to make $220,000 per year. After he made that income, he was perceived equivalently attractive. The study was ONLY measuring height, income, and perceived attractiveness though, so don't take it 100% to heart. It doesn't account for how being smart, funny, charming, dominant, etc. can improve perceived attractiveness
use shoe sole boosters for an extra inch and a half?

Title	How do you not become bitter?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	37
Comments	100
Date	September 27, 2022 1:53 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/xp30rl/how_do_you_not_become_bitter/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-not-become-bitter.1249317 https://theredarchive.com/post/1249317

Comments