How to avoid the friendzone

Silly_Randy · 2024-10-09T09:12:35+00:00

"let's just be friends".

" No that's okay, I have enough friends".

NorCalBull530 · 2024-10-09T13:08:39+00:00

But you say he's just a friend

Dwerg1 · 2024-10-09T17:29:57+00:00

I remember this one time I got friendzoned after fucking her. This was a chick I met on OLD and told her she could come to my place as a first date. I wasn't really expecting that to work, I just didn't care to do it "properly" that time around. For some reason she went along with it and didn't flake.

Problem was that at this point I was very much inexperienced and hadn't practiced any physical escalation, so it was kinda the first time for that. I went waaay too slow and I definitely felt very awkward because she was pretty passive as well, but it really was just a case of her expecting me to make all the moves. I just kept pushing through my feelings of awkwardness and somehow we ended up fucking.

Anyways, after the date she texted me saying pretty much directly I was "like a priest or something" and that it's better we're just friends. I thought that was the end of it and I certainly wasn't going to hang around to be blue balled, so I told her that there's no fucking circumstance that I'll be her friend, it's either something more than that or it's nothing.

By some miracle she did a 180, blew up my phone and wanted to come over to fuck again ASAP. So she did, this time I didn't hold back.

Sounds like a success story, but within the 2 weeks of this thing with her I discovered she's a lying cunt. My game might have been weak, but my boundaries were strong. So it ended with me ghosting her and she literally begging to have me back. Fortunately she stopped blowing up my phone within 2 days of me not responding.

Wildest friendzone experience I've had, completely turned it around just to realize she was never even worth it. Helped a lot breaking down my naivety towards women, to not just try to get them, but to think of whether I even want them.

Sandvicheater · 2024-10-09T22:40:20+00:00

Playing too safe in your actions and answers means you'll never get a 2nd date or laid.

An example I'm very politically moderate with some conservative opinions which grinds gears with a lotttta women in Los Angeles who are liberal feminist. So one date girl gets all political asking me about my thoughts on abortion (i'm all for it about choice) and next question was about gender pay gap. I told her that gender pay gap is not so black and white and that there's huge grey area regarding that and her face blew up I saw it. I triggered her ass into a nuclear zone. She had raised tone and started blasting me with facts and statistics and i respectfully rebutted with my own facts and figures. This heated conversation went on into the night and I figured she was gonna ghost my ass but to my surprise she invited me up to her room for some miracle reason. Dunno if she wanted to "convert" me, hate fuck me, or attracted to man who willing to express his opinion even if it meant opposition to hers who knows.

2Lazy2beLazy · 2024-10-09T18:32:27+00:00

It's OK to have women friends. But, you can't be interested in them sexually or romantically. That will be a disaster. You're going to have to be OK with them meeting other men, ignoring you, and hooking up with others who are not you. Remember, you're just friends. It's possible you may have hookups with your friend, but she's not going to date you. Dont make it weird if you hookup.

There are benefits to having female friends. They make better wingmen than the boys. They'll have an excuse to get you into a night with the ladies(he's my DD). Going on a date, their going to be straight up about your appearance and tell you to change it up, shower off the cologne, etc..

Downside, having to carry you drunk friend out of the bar frequently. You're going to hear frequent girl gossip and problems. You're probably going to catch feelings at some point. They're going to call you in the middle of the night before some big presentation you have I. The morning because they need to be rescued.

aeturnus95 · 2024-10-09T08:48:13+00:00

Solid advice sir. Love it. 👌

smalleyesx · 2024-10-09T15:32:24+00:00

Don't be too available.

GordonGartrelle2020 · 2024-10-09T18:45:41+00:00

I was dating a girl who was still going through a separation and she said she still had too much emotional baggage to date, so after we had sex she told me she really liked me but she needed to pause dating for a while. I assumed the real issue was she didn't feel a physical connection, although I was surprised since it was definitely a good night.

A few months later she started blowing up my phone, so I assumed she was telling the truth the first time and we went on a date. Shortly after she had a bunch of personal family stuff land on her and she decided again that she wasn't ready to date. I confirmed again that she felt a spark and she liked me, and based on what she was going through I could totally understand that it was a lot for her to deal with.

I told her I'm happy to be her friend for now. TBD if that was the right decision, but for now it feels right so we'll see how it goes. I have other dates lined up so I'm not waiting for her or anything.

New_Atmosphere_9247 · 2024-10-09T19:19:24+00:00

Think about the offer, though! She might have other hot friends!

hyyg7 · 2024-10-09T13:31:20+00:00

In march, after 2 dates, a girl I reaaaally liked told me she wouldn't go further with me. I told her we could still be friends because we had a nice connection but not in a romantic way in her opinion. So we became friends, and a few months later after getting to know me better, she began having feelings for me. My plan worked, we're together for 2 months now. Never give up, you can get out of the friendzone my boys.

letsbehavingu · 2024-10-09T15:10:00+00:00

Meh my cousin has a beautiful wife who had him the friendzone for a long time

TuneSoft7119 · 2024-10-10T02:30:49+00:00

how can you avoid the friendzone when you have to be friends with a girl to like her?

csgecko · 2024-10-10T03:12:07+00:00

Be more attractive

combustiblelemons9 · 2024-10-10T05:34:58+00:00

What does "be clear about your intentions" mean? Do I just tell her I love her the first time I see her?

IGetBoredSometimes23 · 2024-10-10T06:51:27+00:00

It feels like all of your posts were copied and pasted from material from other dating coaches.

KarmaKollectiv · 2024-10-10T07:08:24+00:00

Solid advice, but you’re missing the fact that even if she isn’t interested in you romantically, this is fine. Not everyone is going to be. However, she presumably has friends she could introduce you to and a warm intro goes a long way…

Love is plentiful and abundant boys. Women can be wonderful friends. Don’t be short-sighted.

Acceptable_Act1435 · 2024-10-10T07:47:59+00:00

I have a hard time understanding the "women enjoy the attention even if you are friends", as if it was a female characteristic to manipulate men into not having sex and getting the only thing they want (attention), while for men it's the other way around, they only give attention if they get sex in return. Women also like sex and men also like attention and sometimes women don't want the attention and men don't want sex.

I also enjoy the attention from friends, male or female and sometimes I friendzone my dates, too, sometimes before and sometimes after having had sex. I'm not always thinking about how to fuck every women that crosses my path. To me that's too much thinking outside of the abubdance mindset. I don't avoid the friendzone at all cost, because sometimes it's just very clear, we are not for each other, because most times I don't (or she doesn't) make intentions clear or nothing happens, it's just not ment to be because of lack of chemistry or attraction.

If you are not interested in having her as a friend, just move on and if you're always getting friendzoned, stop treating her as only a friend.

bossscran · 2024-10-10T09:51:42+00:00

I f*cked up :(

punktfan1 · 2024-10-09T19:44:36+00:00

My favorite advice stems from here.

https://youtu.be/BT9h5ifR1tY?si=hEc3gNFxQ2s3yicc

epimpstyle · 2024-10-09T11:03:38+00:00

Actually, you can't avoid being friendzoned, but you can try, and if you are friendzoned, at least keep her because she will be your wingwoman for you. When you tell her to go out with you and drink something, she will bring 1-2 (female friends) with her, boom! You have the opportunity to meet new girls without any effort.

ControlInfamous8517 · 2024-10-11T00:04:55+00:00

For men out there just stay in the friend zone its lucky to even have friend with her Tip's :when the two of you talk creat a sexual tension or not talk at all

How to avoid the friendzone

How to Avoid the Friendzone

Why Women Friendzone Men

Comments

Title	How to avoid the friendzone
Author	BerichtenKoning
Upvotes	177
Comments	52
Date	October 9, 2024 8:27 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1fzmmh3/how_to_avoid_the_friendzone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-avoid-the-friendzone.1532512 https://theredarchive.com/post/1532512