Stop turning your dates into interviews

Thispastwknd · 2024-05-31T03:09:35+00:00

I love when people say “be yourself” such a fucking lie😂

Blazing_Swayze · 2024-05-31T02:48:53+00:00

An eye opener. Yesterday I was chatting up a little brunette and while I did talk about my own knowledge on the subject I asked too many questions and she unmatched me. The chat disappeared so I couldn't study why but this makes sense. I never was one to talk about myself though.

Mc_Dickles · 2024-05-31T02:44:36+00:00

Bonus points, throw in some statements in there that you can heavily flirt with locking eyes. Sometime in the middle of the conversation just say heavy like “I really like talking to you” or “wow, you’re really interesting. I didn’t expect that from you.”

Her responses will allow you to really tighten in and flirt.

Kagenikakushiteru · 2024-05-31T10:12:13+00:00

If a guy has to keep asking stupid questions the chick is probably boring. Stop putting these women on a pedestal it’s up to them to carry the conversation too

FlexViper · 2024-05-31T02:34:29+00:00

This post actually makes me think alittle or try to play a conversation in my head. But some of the attractive guy lines sounded like a yes or no answer so basically just try not to make it one line question?

I am guessing is like asking her questions while adding in your own opinion and input into the subject you're asking? like anime convention for example. I remembered asking a random girl who I don't know questions.

like for starter I go with "hey my friend wants to know what character you're cosplaying as since I am not a very cultured person sometime" then after she answered my question I follow up with "do you cosplay often?" I know it's boring way to break the ice but I was going with the flow doing cold approach once you started you can't think or have time to come up with something witty.

But when I asked her "so uh whatchu doing right now? Taking Pic with rando in your cosplay outfit?" she answered me by saying she's here to buy vtuber merch.

I know alot about vtuber culture so when that subject comes up and I talked with her about the latest drama and scandal we seem to hit it off. But I am still a newbie in this so I forgot to asked for her social like Instagram or number.

So basically from what I can remember I did unattractive guy lines like 3 or 4 times without my input and opinion in some of my questions. But then those 3 or 4 of those lines is where I legit have no opinions on just wanting to break the ice in general.

t1gerrr · 2024-05-31T06:05:37+00:00

That’s such a bullshit. Just fucking be a decent humans being and that’s usually more than enough. No need to make a clown out of yourself.

Dandys3107 · 2024-05-31T06:49:48+00:00

I believe the thing is more about directing a conversation in a specific direction. To recognize some mutual points, get to know each other, trigger emotions, get more personal and intimate mentally etc. Going through random topics won't get you anywhere, and may even negatively confuse the girl about your motives.

Kylearean · 2024-05-31T12:43:09+00:00

100% This is the biggest mistake most guys make in both text and in person.

PainFreeDating · 2024-05-31T04:43:32+00:00

Oh man, yes! I definitely try to share far more than ask. Stories > questions

hairlx · 2024-05-31T11:24:36+00:00

Bro sometimes what ever you do you are unatrractive as a pshycal just talk and try her.

K-kitty9218 · 2024-05-31T12:17:15+00:00

I think this is half true. Endless questions that don't glean anything or lead anywhere are sort of pointless. Dates are not just meant to be peacock fests. They're like 10% vetting, 35% charming the opposite sex. The rest is meant to get to know the person you're with to see if you like them. The best advice here is to know how to use questions to initiate meaningful conversation. Don't ask pointless questions. Ask genuine things you want to know (within reasons, stay polite, check your manners.)

Ex:

Person1: I'm partial to italian myself, what food do you enjoy.

Partner: Oh I like sushi.

Person 1: Oh really, do you have a favorite restaurant? I really like Blue Fish, they have a dragon roll that is to die for. Do you like fish, you might enjoy ceviche

Partner: I've heard of ceviche, isn't it a spanish dish? Its---- blah blah blah you get it.

Also women are not static people in a conversation they can take charge too. Just be genuine, not a creep and polite. Not all women are crazy hard to please.

epimpstyle · 2024-05-31T18:22:59+00:00

Of course, when you get short answers, you try to keep asking questions until you find a "hook" to talk about.

In your example below, there isn't that much to say:

Unattractive Guy: What was the most interesting exhibit you saw?

Woman: **Getting annoyed** I don’t know, I saw a lot

I am taking such short answers as IOD and I am preparing to leave, my presence is not welcome. In this example you gave her the option to create a complex sentence and she replied, "I don't know, I've seen a lot"... that's not good.

Also nothing wrong with this:

Unattractive Guy: That sounds cool, I’d like to travel there sometime.

Woman: **Feeling awkward** Yeah you should.

Of course, the guy will say this playfully, but if he still gets such an answer, he should not stay there.

MaxPhantom_ · 2024-05-31T04:16:23+00:00

How do I practice this?

Chomprz · 2024-05-31T11:41:38+00:00

I realized I’ve always enjoyed teasing their imagination, kind of painting a picture of those hypothetical “us” and “we”. It’s fun and it gets them to be more passionate during convos.

RainMystery · 2024-06-03T07:43:35+00:00

Questions and topics that work for me.

Asking what age they first got drunk

Topics related to tattoos, if they have some ask which was their first, it's also a potential opportunity to add touch comfort.

Topics related to food, especially dessert, not sure why this works for me maybe it's the association with treats or it has links to memories of being on vacation in the sunshine?

To get out of work Topics ask about what they dreamed of being as a kid, it can usually lead to making the conversation funny.

Asking if they used to get into trouble as a kid, if they did the line of questions that follow should be obvious, if they were always good then you jave to ask questions that try to tease them to be more rebellious, I've found that this has them trying to provide their badass side to me.

These general work well for me,l.

ZenoGeno · 2024-05-31T11:04:47+00:00

I think this is BS to a point, if the girl in the first example is attracted to the guy she'll ask questions back, you made it seem like the dude cold approached her and she didn't want anything to do with him.

GaryOak7 · 2024-05-31T15:20:23+00:00

I find the opposite to be true. Women are the ones who turned the dating scene into interviews with low effort and a negative mindset. She’s looking for red flags before you even know her last name.

It’s your job as the man to de-escalate the situation with humor, especially with online dating. Everything is doom & gloom with them and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve went on dates or engaged with women and their conversation was drier than the Sahara. Being rather the attractive guy or unattractive.. you’re dealing with A LOT of time wasters. This isn’t isolated either, you can observe it and I’ve seen it happen to numerous friends.

Women who weren’t time wasters get to the point. They give you days they’re free and they don’t take forever and a day to reply.

You’re asking too many questions, you’re not asking enough questions.. it’s never right. It’s a numbers game at the end of the day. It’s better for her to make the first move and most of this is avoidable and the tone is set.

AsianLatina2020 · 2024-05-31T06:51:24+00:00

Exactly

Mecinanos · 2024-05-31T17:44:05+00:00

In your example the attractive guy sounds a lot more like a loser than the unattractive guy

Afraid-Air1243 · 2024-05-31T14:36:46+00:00

Bro just ask questions genuine and try to relate to what the woman is saying. Joke around be playful dont be serious be confident in yourself to take things too seriously. It's a game after all ;)

bannedcanceled · 2024-05-31T20:22:11+00:00

Ahahahha. Bro i went out with a peruvian girl yesterday and she asked me if i tried guinea pig while i was there

GLOBALKEBAB · 2024-06-01T12:42:31+00:00

We need more examples like this

Chipster339 · 2024-06-01T14:26:35+00:00

Well sure, lying and saying stuff women wants to hear must be great.

We both know you don’t want to travel with her anywhere

Unlucky-Pie-801 · 2024-06-01T18:28:04+00:00

If only it were that easy but you’re spot on.

Kobe_curry24 · 2024-06-01T18:46:04+00:00

What you want to be is interested, and you want to see if you actually like her also this why I hate sit down date y’all should be on the move

Title	Stop turning your dates into interviews
Author	MO_drps_knwldg
Upvotes	296
Comments	61
Date	May 31, 2024 1:38 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1d4k42w/stop_turning_your_dates_into_interviews/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/stop-turning-your-dates-into-interviews.1520099 https://theredarchive.com/post/1520099

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