Sure, maybe your best friend Allen just got laid last weekend and now all the sudden you’re so full of jealousy your dick is about to fall off.

Here’s the thing.

You can always be jealous about something. Right now, it’s your virginity. In 10 years, your coworker is going to get a 20% raise and you’re only going to get a 10% raise. You wanna be jealous about that too?

Or how about in 30 years when you have 3 kids, a mortgage payment, and a white picket fence--when you find out your neighbor Chris just bought a goddamn ferrari. You wanna get jealous about that too?

The point is, even if you’re the next Mark Zuckerberg you can still find something to feel insecure about unless you start handling that part of your life now.

Practice letting things go now.

Yes, I know you think about losing your virginity, morning, day, and night.

But you don’t need to make yourself miserable over it. It doesn’t serve you any good, I promise.

Your Manhood is Not Attached to the Women You Sleep with

“That Benjamin Franklin guy was such a badass. I bet he got A TON of pussy.” - Said no one ever

Guys, your validation as a man does not come from sleeping with women. I know it certainly feels that way with Western culture jamming it down your throat every second. But you are no different as a man whether you have sex or not.

If you feel the urge to tally up a bunch of women so validate yourself. Ask yourself this, when is it enough?

1 ,2, 20, 30? Why keep track in the first place? What does that prove? Nothing.

If your friends judge you and put you down because you haven’t had sex they are shitty friends. The reason they are putting you down is because they are just as insecure and need a way to validate themselves too.

Being in high school / early college is actually a shitty time for guys for meeting women

In high school I was in a band with some friends, I had a job, I went to parties, I played a lot of World of Warcraft. I was your middle of the road, average guy. For the life of me, I couldn’t get any women interested in me. I thought I was fucked.

The strange thing about high school is that most dating is based around status. Football players, athletes, popular kids, they all get first pick. There’s some research proving why, but the reason is because women are just as clueless as you are when it comes to dating / sex.

A while back I was dating a girl and we brought up the conversation about dating in high school. She told me she dated a soccer player because he was a soccer player. They had nothing in common, and it would have never worked in a million years.

High school is a weird time. Ask anyone out of high school and they will agree.

It gets better, if you try

I promise, if you put in the effort it will pay off big time.

BUILD RELATIONSHIPS - Go out and make friends. Hang out with your friends and do fun stuff with them. You will remember those moments forever, and it will make your life 100x better.

GET IN SHAPE - You look better, feel better, and have more confidence.

FOCUS ON WHAT YOU LOVE - If you love programming, start building apps, websites, whatever the fuck comes to mind. if you love cars, build cars and then sell them.

If you are absolutely clueless like I was at your age, move to a ski resort and snowboard every day for a year. Or travel the world. Both are awesome.

DO ANYTHING - But be the guy who sits on the couch all day. Your life can’t improve by staring at your phone all day.

WORK ON SOCIAL SKILLS - I used to be painfully shy and awkward. I got over that by practicing conversation. At first, I would smile at strangers on the street. Then I would practice with baristas at Starbucks. Eventually I worked my way up and people tell me, “Wow, you’re really outgoing.”

Little do they know I’m super introverted and used to not know how to look someone in the eye and say hello.

No one actually cares

No one cares you’re a virgin, except you. Just like no one cares that you ate pizza for lunch and decided to upload it to Instagram. Or how no one cares that Kanye is running for president in 2020.

People by nature are self centered. This doesn’t mean no one cares about YOU, they just don’t care about your small problems.

Take the imaginary magnifying glass off yourself. People aren’t just constantly looking at you and judging you for what you have or haven’t done.

Most of all, relax

When I start talking to my friends now we talk about how no girls were into us. We always laugh because we put more effort into trying to get girlfriends than was healthy.

But most of all when I think about high school I think about how I hung out with friends, laughed, and, how easy life was.

It will be ok.

-Mark