I hate everyone

WiteOut · 2012-03-26T00:24:34+00:00

The best way to overcome this problem is to do the opposite. Rather than looking for their imperfections try to find something good and unique about them, don't be afraid to tell them either. You have to teach yourself to have this mentality, eventually it naturally happens.

Zeptometer · 2012-03-25T22:12:18+00:00

Solution: don't be an ass.

now, for a real answer: that sounds like a symptom of something else that could be a problem with your seduction: without empathy, you'll have a hard time appropriately gauging the proper reactions to things, and, also, it sounds like you're making them 'the enemy', when they are more aptly called, 'the opponent.' very different things.

Ragas · 2012-03-26T00:38:57+00:00

I had this phase too eventually it's probably not them, it's you. I think Zeptometer hit it on the head.

Try beeing more positive about yourself.

totalradass · 2012-03-26T06:32:12+00:00

Some people have a very narrow view of what makes a person cool. I think the thinking that is at the root of this behavior, only serves to narrow their experience of the world. It isn't even about being judgmental or not, it is about enjoying the world around you.

There is a fundamental difference in thinking between "looking" and "appreciating" the world around you. As soon as one "looks" for something then they are going to miss everything that isn't that.

I have my favorite kind of flower, but if I'm out walking I don't say well that's not a lily so it can fuck off. I try to enjoy whatever is around me, and still be able to tell when a weed is a weed.

libreg · 2012-03-25T22:22:21+00:00

Well, are they stupid? Uninteresting? Boring? Materialistic? You might be going after the wrong girls.

philofthepresnt · 2012-03-26T02:03:07+00:00

Yeah same boat here to, I would love to practise my seduction skills but rarely do I find a girl I could be bothered to talk to. That's why I like to drink.

gosgood · 2012-03-26T02:13:02+00:00

The Seinfeld Dilemma. When looking for it, we all have a fatal flaw. I can be guilty of trying to find something wrong just so I don't have to pursue her. This is obviously the wrong approach and will lead to fewer closes. I tend to be very picky and if I find this fatal flaw, I will have a "friend zone" conversation. This is counter productive and something I really need to work on. But really, who wants to date a girl with "man hands"?

ichlibejuice · 2012-03-26T02:02:56+00:00

You judge too quickly. I have the same problem though. A couple weeks ago these girls came into a party I was at, and immediately--just by the way they were dressed and their body language--I assumed they were just dumb party girls. We still hung out all night. Turns out my assumption was wrong. They liked to party but weren't dumb at all. But that wouldn't have meant they had bad personalities or anything anyway. Eventually hooked up with one who had been throwing glances at me all night. I found out the morning after that she's a very successful model for a pretty major magazine (think hawaiian tropic type stuff, but less sleazy). Her friends told me the night before but I thought they were full of shit. (not because she wasn't absolutely stunning, I'm just skeptical when girls say shit like that)

wtjones · 2012-03-26T03:27:43+00:00

Six Pillars of Self-Esteem will help.

sillymallard · 2012-03-26T08:32:09+00:00

It's okay to be picky. That's an admirable trait, but you sound like a glass half empty kind of person. Something else might be keeping you fully happy and content with life besides girls.

2012-03-26T15:19:18+00:00

the only time i reject a woman right away is if she's religious, repressed or right wing. Other than that i try to get to know them. Sounds like you might be finding fault with them to avoid risking rejection by them upon pursuit. I catch myself doing that.

Estatunaweena · 2012-03-26T16:12:23+00:00

Stop masturbating all the time.

hux1ey · 2012-03-26T07:57:21+00:00

You sound like a sociopath.

cptimmy30 · 2012-03-26T00:06:56+00:00

[permanently deleted]

lookiamapollo · 2012-03-26T01:19:41+00:00

I am in your same boat a lot. Eventually you get in the right mood and find the right girl. They are out there, just rare.

obviously_subtle · 2012-03-26T09:54:50+00:00

Oh, I have that too. It might be the negativity effect, which cause you to assume flaws in someone else are what defines them as a person, if you don't like them already. If you want to overcome that, you'll have to think "s/he's acting super stupid right now, but I'm biased too". Then again, sometimes they just are stupid.

2012-03-26T13:17:01+00:00

It's easy to immediately dismiss someone for a certain trait. On one level, it's too judgmental. On another level, you have standards in a partner.

Find the right balance. Give the girl a shot. If all you have is a first impression, then you don't know her at all.

krypto1339 · 2012-03-26T16:08:55+00:00

One of the most valuable things I've learned in pickup (and life, for that matter) is that the world will not change for you. Sad, but true. But the anxiety often comes from the idea that there is no part of the world that can match up to your expectations.

It might be that you're expecting too much too fast. Remember, the bitch shield is a strong one, but there's a reason we hack through it. Because once you do get to the center of that tootsie pop, you remember how much you fucking love chocolate. It's about building a connection, and you aren't going to tap someone's core in a single approach.

2012-03-26T16:22:03+00:00

It could be a defense mechanism for you... kinda like dumping someone before they dump you and spare yourself the pain (which doesn't really work). Maybe explore your thoughts a little more and get to the heart of the matter.

breadrising · 2012-03-26T17:25:13+00:00

Just think, most people you meet are just as nervous as you are. Its very easy to say stupid shit that you didn't mean or come off a certain way on accident, especially when booze is involved. Take what they say with a grain of salt and just enjoy a natural, flowing conversation.

Its good to have standards, but try to go into the night without the bar set so high. If all else fails, the age old trick of fake it til you make it works suprisingly well.

PrincePUA · 2012-03-25T23:21:31+00:00

If this is just been on the off-occasion then its probably just a bad spell of girls. But if this is a consistent theme with engaging new girls, then its almost certainly something about you - maybe you should consider the notion you're just not interested in picking-up girls at the moment, that could be why everyones coming across as unappealing (despite physical attraction)

cptimmy30 · 2012-03-25T23:22:26+00:00

Its all of those libreg. Some are stupid, some are inconsiderate, and others I feel like I'd get arrested around them because they do stupid shit. And these aren't girls I'm trying to flirt with. I just run into them when out in public or through friends and I meet them and I just think "you are a terrible person." Generally it has helped my social life because I avoid drama, fights, and the trouble that the person brings that I've suspected from previous interactions.

nrvale00 · 2012-03-26T03:24:27+00:00

Been there. Maybe you are being glass-half-empty and investing too much in the interaction?

Just do activities you enjoy and don't take the interactions that seriously. Even the women who turn you off are still fun to tease. Plus, your initial impressions of someone rarely give you an accurate idea of the full package. Maybe they are copping an attitude because they had a bad day at work or are getting over a bad break-up or aren't happy with their hair that night or whatever.

"I'm a cool guy and I'm here to have fun and I'm not going to let you bring me down."

Drapetomania · 2012-03-26T04:29:38+00:00

I think you're just coming to understand that good-looking girls have had easier lives and they become docile and soft-brained like your average cow.

Title	I hate everyone
Author	cptimmy30
Upvotes	10
Comments	55
Date	March 25, 2012 10:08 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/rd8gt/i_hate_everyone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-hate-everyone.1291983 https://theredarchive.com/post/1291983

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