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A woman who exploited lonely and vulnerable men by promising to introduce them to their "perfect match" has been ordered to pay back more than $342,000 in compensation.

EvilPundit

November 13, 2012

525 upvotes

/r/MensRights

http://www.smh.com.au/nsw/true-love-con-lonely-men-scammed-out-of-thousands-20121113-29a4a.html

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Title	A woman who exploited lonely and vulnerable men by promising to introduce them to their "perfect match" has been ordered to pay back more than $342,000 in compensation.
Author	EvilPundit
Upvotes	525
Comments	119
Date	November 13, 2012 7:26 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/134xqr/a_woman_who_exploited_lonely_and_vulnerable_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/a-woman-who-exploited-lonely-and-vulnerable-men-by.1009307 https://theredarchive.com/post/1009307

Comments

[–][deleted] 32 points33 points34 points 13 years ago (18 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Lucaribro 5 points6 points7 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Xombieshovel 5 points6 points7 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Closer to the placebo effect I imagine. IF people believe it's gonna work for them, then it's gonna work. Statistically, you're bound to have something in common with whoever you meet, and that's immediately gonna be the first thing your mind goes to on that first date.

"Oh wow, she loves dogs, cars, and pizza. eHarmony really nailed it!"

You ignore just how much she doesn't share in common with you so that even if you had reservations at the beginning, they're quickly diminished. You want it to work, you believe it'll work, and even if you didn't you quickly start to think it has worked.

The rest is simple. eHarmony works, but it works by making people believe it works, even if it doesn't in actuality. Despite this, the most important thing is that people end up happy and together, and regardless of method, eHarmony is putting people together.

The question is, can eHarmony be replicated, minus the cost of actually paying for it?

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[–]EvilPundit[S] 5 points6 points7 points 13 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link

oh man why didn't you write all that to begin with?

My bad. When I see stuff like this, I tend to go outrage first, analysis later.

so let's talk about this, starting with:

the guilty parties seem to have escaped appropriate punishment

she has already been sentenced to personally pay back the $342k she scammed her 'clients' out of - resulting in her declaring bankruptcy, in addition to being legally barred from ever working in that industry. what further punishment do you think would be appropriate?

Well, for one thing, by declaring bankruptcy she can probably avoid paying the fine, keep her house and other essential possessions, and have her bankruptcy discharged in seven years.

The fact that all of the scammers have declared bankruptcy stinks of them having stashed the money somewhere in preparation. In effect this could be no punishment at all.

And a lifetime ban from running dating agencies? That's a joke. There are plenty of other ways to make a buck.

What would be an appropriate punishment? In my eyes, her crime is the equivalent of serial rape. She should serve a lengthy jail sentence without parole, and be placed on the sex offenders registry.

[–]mattlohkamp 6 points7 points8 points 13 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

There's no way I could ever agree with you about the rape equivalency. This was an entirely non-violent crime. There was nothing even approaching rape or molestation or even anything sexual about her conduct. Putting her on the sex offender's registry doesn't make any sense whatsoever. That list is for actual sex offenders.

A jail sentence wouldn't be uncalled-for, I agree - because you're right, it'd be easy for her to run other scams that don't technically fall under the 'introductions industry.' She needs to be removed from the luxury that her crime has afforded her, as punishment for her actions.

the bankruptcy thing - I'll be honest, I'm not a legal or financial guy, so I don't really know about all the implications - but I didn't think it was a loophole for getting out of repayment. Doesn't it simply allow the bankrupt party a period of time to get back on their feet financially, before resuming repayment? The idea being, if you're poverty-ridden and homeless or whatever, you're probably not going to be in a great position to pay back what you owe - whereas if you could pursue new work, you'd have an income that you could put towards paying off the fines?

[–]EvilPundit[S] 4 points5 points6 points 13 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

There's no way I could ever agree with you about the rape equivalency. This was an entirely non-violent crime.

So are many rapes, as currently defined by law.

There was nothing even approaching rape or molestation or even anything sexual about her conduct.

Her behaviour amounts to emotional sexual abuse of the worst kind. I believe it should be regarded as a crime.

the bankruptcy thing - I'll be honest, I'm not a legal or financial guy, so I don't really know about all the implications - but I didn't think it was a loophole for getting out of repayment. Doesn't it simply allow the bankrupt party a period of time to get back on their feet financially, before resuming repayment?

I'm not a legal or financial guy either, but as I understand it, bankruptcy discharges most debts. Whether that would apply to compensation/fines in Australia, I don't know.

[–]NiteTiger 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]mattlohkamp 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

There's no way I could ever agree with you about the rape equivalency. This was an entirely non-violent crime.

So are many rapes, as currently defined by law.

that is an entirely fair point, I'll concede that a crime doesn't have to be violent to count as sexual abuse.

Her behaviour amounts to emotional sexual abuse of the worst kind. I believe it should be regarded as a crime.

no one is arguing that it isn't a crime, obviously - I assume that's a typo and you were referring to it being a sexual crime, equivalent to sexual abuse, specifically rape according to your argument.

I know, it seems silly to make sure we're copacetic on a definition of 'rape,' but it makes sense to me to talk about 'rape' as it is legally defined in Australia - is that what you had in mind? note that every definition appears (I only skimmed it, to be fair) to deal specifically with physical activity, not emotional.

bankruptcy discharges most debts

seems like a completely unfair loophole, doesn't it? declaring bankruptcy can't be a legitimate 'get-out-of-jail-free' card - why not just rob a bank, spend all the money, then declare bankruptcy? I guess one of us needs to do some research, though, since neither of us knows for sure.

[–]EvilPundit[S] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]kronox 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

What the hell happened to this subreddit? How is this the number one front page thing? These guys were dumb enough to give in to an obvious scheme. This happens a lot, to all sorts of people. Old ladies, old men, dumb women, dumb men, dumb kids with credit cards... This is clearly not a men's rights issue and this sub should be ashamed by having this at the top for even a moment.

I have been here for over two years and honestly im starting to feel the recent influx of subscribers is to our detriment. We don't need zealous victimhood pursuers. We need to focus on things that specifically affect men. Yes, it would be nice if schemes didn't exist and honesty colored the land like crayola rainbows but that's a different topic altogether.

Whether it takes having keywords on the sidebar that submissions have to be related to or moderator criticism or something else i think something should be done.

I love this place, a lot. It really has gotten me through some seriously tough times, so the thought of us looking like something we clearly arent angers me. I hope all of you agree with me.

[–]EvilPundit[S] 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

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...How often do normal people say "Oh, they should be put to death because they are assholes."?

1 For a crime this serious, quite a lot of people.

2 This isn't exactly "asshole" behavior. Asshole behavior is playing your music loud on a wednesday night, or egging someone's house, or tailgating, or bumping into someone and not saying excuse me. Scamming someone out of their life savings and forcing people into poverty, especially people who might be retired with no way to earn that money back, is quite a bit more serious than asshole.

I might not rationally agree with a call for the death penalty for the crime of scamming, but I absolutely do understand the sentiment. Scammers are scumbags, and they deserve to have awful things happen to them.

actively looking for any way to discredit your cause

"Lookit those guys! They're upset about scam artists!" I don't think it's something to be concerned about.

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for one thing, it assumes that they're putting time into making money. they could be independently wealthy, they could happen to have a very high-paying job that they don't have to work hard at. They could have some sort of social anxiety -type disability. They could have no interest in playing the 'dating game.' Who knows? You and I certainly don't know.

Here's the thing, time is money - and strictly speaking, putting time into meeting women or paying someone else to find a woman for you amount to the same effort, just from different angles. If someone knows you really well, and sets you up with someone else they know really well, because their intimate knowledge of the two of you brings them to the conclusion that you would pair well, and you pay for that service, does that make your relationship with your partner any less legitimate?

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