Man I'm tired of women blaming me for not crying enough and never calling out this shit. How am I supposed to deal with these it is honestly driving me to the point of self hatred. How do I deal with this? Please Help! I feel so weak and defeated.

a-man-from-earth · 2021-03-29T08:21:33+00:00

We understand, and we are here to support you.

https://www.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/m3ryls/its_okay_to_be_a_man_being_a_man_is_not_a_crime/

And please take care of yourself. Consider calling a helpline if you need to talk.

DefiantDepth8932 · 2021-03-29T06:12:14+00:00

I'm sorry that I came off as kinda rude about women in the post I didn't mean to do that and realised it only after I had posted that.

But yeah I feel so crushed by the fact that me being expressing my emotional will only make these women gloat about how belittled they've made me feel while they blame me and my toxic masculinity if I don't cry enough. I've had enough of it. As a man, I don't want to live anymore. If I don't express my feelings, I am going to be blamed for toxic masculinity whereas if I do, women are going to gloat about my suffering.

Somehow 'boys will be boys' is considered more of an offensive term to put on a t shirt than this stupid shit. All the man hate on the internet has caused me extreme distress. Most of the friends I have had are female and for the past couple years I've seen them all say similar shit on the internet and they all abandon me after I call them out on this shit. I don't know how much I can go on.

matrixislife · 2021-03-29T09:33:50+00:00

Something to remember. People lie. They lie to avoid blame, they lie to make themselves feel better, they lie to make others feel better about them, they lie to make others feel worse about themselves.

When someone is trying to tell you that you are inherently bad/evil/toxic because of your sex, they are lying. Mostly they are lying because it gives them a political advantage, see feminism, but occasionally it's because it's what they have been told to believe. It doesn't really matter though, what matters is that they are lying. Anyone talking about toxic masculinity is lying for power over you, so don't feel a need to believe them.

There's this big culture war been drawn up, promoted like a boxing match, men vs women. It doesn't exist. Men and women are partners. If it ever does get to be a war then the human race is doomed, and there's no sign that's going to happen. There are millions of women out there who think men are kinda cool, and vice versa. Men have spent millenia protecting and cherishing women, and again women have done the same for men, so don't let a quick blip these last twenty years convince you otherwise just for someone's shitty politics.

Old-Compote-9991 · 2021-03-29T11:27:50+00:00

I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling that way. Feeling hopeless and loss is becoming more and more common amongst men and posts like this don't help at best and at worst, they actively hurt men.

Women's opinions about what it means to be a man are irrelevant. Women who want to control you and tell you how to act will never be man and never know what it means to be a man. Anyone with opinions like the post are simply people you know to avoid.

LettuceBeGrateful · 2021-03-29T11:44:32+00:00

If you ever feel like the hate is overwhelming you, check off social media and engage in the IRL things that make you happy. I think you'll be surprised how effective a short social media detox can be on your mental health.

And for the love of god, don't be friends with people who think toxic shit like that is okay.

Cold_Conversation_51 · 2021-03-29T14:46:30+00:00

And they wonder why men don't want to open up about their feelings.

BloomingBrains · 2021-03-29T17:36:49+00:00

I have a very simple rule. If it would be considered unseemly for a man to make a statement like this in the reverse (I love to make women cry), then the same situation applies. It isn't worth getting upset over one angry feminist that has it out for men. Someone who is that vindictive obviously isn't in that great of a place in life to begin with, so don't let her drag you down into her misandry and misery.

I get that you can extrapolate this kind of sentiment to one that a lot of people have in general, but sometimes you have to evaluate things individually to stay sane.

ShortTailBoa · 2021-03-29T08:42:43+00:00

Why the fuck would you hate yourself instead of the people doing this?

I don't get it. I see this a lot on stuff like /r/MensLib and I just don't understand it.

Cyb3rd31ic_Citiz3n · 2021-03-29T08:17:53+00:00

First step is to stop giving a single solitary fuck about what people like this think about you. If this is what they think of men in general they're not good people and not deserving of your care or consideration. Usually the women who wear shit like this are in their late teens to early twenties, have had next to no life experience, are edgy Feminists who haven't had to face any men's issues because of their female privledge or class status. Also, you're very likely to see this kind of misandry online so take a break from those spaces for a while.

Next is to turn your attention onto you. Really look at yourself. Are you happy? If so, why and if not why not? What are you missing from your life? Now take that a step deeper - what's holding you back from getting these things? Lastly, how can you go about achieving the things you want.

This shift of your attention from outwards onto your own needs and desires will ensure that you're not externalising your problems and moving towards being happier with yourself and you're life.

Teaching boys and men how to self-actualize their needs is a key step to helping you achieve good mental health and deal with life in general. It'll keep you from being stressed by elements you can't control and help you learn how to test the limits of what you can control and how to go about better grasping your own autonomy.

Also, know that the fact you reached out for help doesn't make you weak. True strength comes from knowing one's self and one's limitations. A boy thinks he can take on the world, a man knows it takes everyone because everyone makes up the world.

Know that you're going to be fine. I promise. Take breaths, distance yourself from what makes you feel ill and step towards that which you can influence. It's a tough life lesson that, frankly, no one seems to teach anymore. But if nothing else know that life won't get better until you make changes to yourself first, the rest will follow.

mingray · 2021-03-29T17:58:18+00:00

Lisa is a kpop idol with a sizable young male audience, and she decides to post stuff like this...disappointing :(

Suicidal_Alone · 2021-03-29T16:31:33+00:00

I just don't think a lot of them know what they're doing. I think it's partially just a joke. But when it's over and over again the jokes start to hurt, especially if you're someone like me who is struggling with depression and other mental health issues. It makes me feel like I don't deserve to be alive, it's humiliating.

RedSandman · 2021-03-29T10:14:53+00:00

I’ve always hated this mentality. (Her’s, not yours). Imagine trying to coax a cowering dog out of a bush, only to smack it when it finally trusts you enough to come, then demanding it be put down when it growls at you. That’s how I see this.

bobbybobsonday · 2021-03-29T12:40:04+00:00

Listen to Patrice O'Neal. It changed everything for me

FearlessReaction5 · 2021-03-29T16:28:27+00:00

Girl power teehee

Stanesco1 · 2021-03-29T18:14:33+00:00

Man... 3rd wave feminism is just about capitalizing a new market sector, don't gove a shit about what they think. Get along with cool women and men, then you should be fine. Don't let anyone shit on you just because u r a man. Fuck them.

Virtual-Knight · 2021-03-29T10:14:20+00:00

These women are the most hypocritical parasites on the planet. If you do express your feeling more, they'll just bully you even worse. Feminists claim they want equality, but will they realise that it means women getting longer prison sentences, more women becoming homeless and women getting punished for false rape claims? Feminists are just bigots. I wrote an essay about it a couple of years ago, but some of the links are dead.

Henry_Blair · 2021-03-29T09:53:50+00:00

You and all men are currently living under incitement no less severe than in some of the most brutal historical racist societies. This will be resolved only with a relentless struggle that will result in a humanist revolution against feminism, and it's replacement by humane equality. Until then, you need to maintain your mental health. First, you need to transform as much as possible your exposure to the feminist incitement and legitimized hate speech, from passive exposure to active engagement. If you are not planning to resist it in a certain time of the day or the week, do not expose yourself to it. Because how ubiquitous it became, this might mean not opening the newspaper on certain days, and not scrolling through social media. Expose yourself to this incitement, hate and cruelty only when you are ready to engage it. Second, you need to remind yourself that while the social selves have become corrupted, the inner selves stayed the same. Most women love men and don't want to hurt men, not do they have any agenda of earasing menhood or controlling it. Most are not even aware of what all men are currently living under. Likewise, most men are like you, and only very few, with high exposure, are actively joining the oppression. The inner selves are inaccessible to you because of the social oppression that forbids their exposure. But for your mental health you must expose yourself to their existence. Watch standup comedians on YouTube, such as Bill But, it's a great way to regain a sense of reality.

Also, and I know this might sound strange, but it's relevant - do not watch pornhub. This has become a progressive site that promotes male inferiority that belongs in BDSM and gay sex, to straight vanilla men. The unwritten code of separate interfaces for gay, straight and BDSM has been violated by the site without announcing it and this is detrimental for the ordinary man, because it may distort the sense of reality about the relations between men and women and what their drives are.

There is no way for you to survive these times mentally, without actively filtering your exposure to the messages you are absorbing from the world around you. You will have to bypass the layers of dictation and manipulation, that conceal the inner selves of the majority of the people around you, in order to access these selves and gain a sense of trust and hope. Engage the publicly legitimized anti-men hate speech only when you are willing to confront it, and actively reach out for authentic responses such as standup and YouTube channels. And do what you can to bring the revolution. Support those who start it. Join them if you can.

tiredfromlife2019 · 2021-03-29T16:14:50+00:00

Stop listening to women. Get male friends that are not Feminists.

2021-03-29T08:17:00+00:00

[permanently deleted]

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