There’s a common refrain among RPers and men in general that women like the stereotypical “macho” man who has giant muscles and is super cocky. While those men may have success with women, you still see a ton of women that like men that aren’t very macho.

A lot of men express surprise that women can like feminine traits in men. They scoff at the idea that people like Timothee Chalamet or Damiano David or K-pop boy band members could be attractive, and mock them and call them gay. They have wonder how women could be sexually attracted to a skinny man that spends time on grooming and clothing, and not “real men”.

But those men are very successful. And one big thing I’ve noticed is that it’s usually middle to upper class women that like them. This shows both the status of the man and the woman attracted to the man. A man who can afford to look like prey is a sign that the man is from an environment where there is little violence, usually a suburban or gated neighborhood. The fact that the man can spend time on grooming is a sign that he does not perform manual labor for a living, and is therefore financially well off. And a woman who is attracted to a man like that must be of the same social class too, as she can afford to flaunt a physically incapable boyfriend without worrying about her safety. In lower class neighborhoods, having physical strength and the ability to win physical fights is important, so in those neighborhoods, it’s the traditional jacked tattooed aggressive man that women like. There a reason why “polite society” refers to the upper class. The general idea is that upper class people are polite and respectful, and lower class people are loud and aggressive.

This is somewhat like what some people call “peacocking”. Female peahens choose the most useless peacocks (with the more visible tails) because the fact that those peacocks can afford to have traits associated with being prey, and still live, is a sign that they have good genetics.

This is especially true these days, as lower class men work manual labor and upper class men work in offices.