Fired due to false accusations of sexual harassment

AdamIsAnAlias · 2022-09-01T05:35:35+00:00

This happened to a friend of mine in the army, but he was accused of sexual assault. The gal left on orders an the guy was held in training for a year due to pending potential charges. After a few months, the case went no where, with multiple individuals (including the girls friends) telling the XO that she made it up.

He now has a record for investigation on SA charges in the military that will follow him for the rest of his career. I knew this man. He was sweet, but tall and a minority, he fit the part. It was horrible. She received no repercussions following his hold and dismissed charges. But he suffered for about a year in training. TBF, almost all of the soldiers believed him, but XO had to take it seriously, not the commanders fault.

OldEgalitarianMRA · 2022-09-01T01:36:34+00:00

Are you going to get a good letter of reference? If yes then you don't want to be known as someone who sues your employer so just move on. If this will follow you and hurt you then lawyer up and defend yourself.

And never get romantically involved at work again. Consensual or not.

test90002 · 2022-09-01T02:37:39+00:00

You can certainly speak to a lawyer about it, but the odds are against you. Even if the allegation is proven to be false, you aren't entitled to work there and they can fire you if they want.

Since it is a big tech company, threatening a lawsuit might get you a sizeable financial settlement depending on the circumstances.

shit-zen-giggles · 2022-09-01T01:42:43+00:00

Contact a lawyer and discuss the case. Keep the lawyer in the background as an advisor (don't reveal to the company that you're getting legal advise), unless the lawyer advises it to be strategicly beneficial to reveal their involvement.

other than that: /r/SupportForTheAccused is a sub dedicated to this topic and might have more expirenced and expert advise.

Shaundorian · 2022-09-01T08:09:21+00:00

Seems like another "Male privilege" to me.. getting fired by false accusation..

On a serious note, I'd definitely seek legal advice before just dropping this, but I bet it'll come down to he said she said so I doubt its something you can win, in today's world. :/

TerraBranfordFFVI · 2022-09-01T10:55:41+00:00

Sorry man that's really fucking annoying. She sounds like another fragile whiny adult female there are so many of them. Women that do this pathetic shit remind me of a elementary school kid telling on a kid for saying a bad word or something equally trivial. So much for women's power when their 'power' is merely telling on men for trivial things.

I hope things work out for you. I've never been in this situation so I have no idea of any advice I can only offer sympathy.

TabulaRasa5678 · 2022-09-01T14:46:36+00:00

This happened to me, but my situation was that she was an intern that I was forced to train, stealing my work, 500 miles away, and I never even met her in person. I sent out homemade Xmas candy to people on my team. I had the emails of her asking me for the candy, thanking me for it, and a third email, asking me to send her more in the future.

She knew that she was going to lose her internship because she was stealing my work, so instead of trying to do her own work, it was easier to point her finger at me and scream, "inappropriate behavior". My female regional manager stuck up for me because she knew what the intern was up to AND I showed all three emails to HR. They still fired me.

Now here's the information for you, OP. A woman can claim any form of sexual harassment against a man.... forever. Yet, your statute of limitations for false accusations starts at the very day it occurred and you have one year to the day to get the process going.

Good luck trying to find a lawyer for this. I tried to contact nearly three dozen lawyers. I eventually had to start looking outside of my local area to about a 200-mile radius. Most lawyers, I left a message with and they never returned my call(s). One lawyer was kind enough to call me back and talk to me, free, for a half hour. He told me that taking it to court would be a waste of time and money and that it would be better to take it to arbitration. This is where there is a third-party arbitor and it's you, your accuser, and any legal counsel in a room. But... the lawyer said that he couldn't think of one lawyer that would take a case like that because due to this MeToo crap, defamation cases "are largely unwinnable". I also asked him about suing the company and he told me that I should have deep pockets and "lots of time" because a large company will bury me in delays... on purpose.

I'm giving you the benefit of my experience here and it will frustrate you like nothing else. It's been four years and I'm still pissed off about it. I hope by telling you all of this, you will realize that it's better financially and mentally, to just move on. Good luck!

TRUCKBOB · 2022-09-01T01:37:53+00:00

since ur fired now u will need a lawyer to fight it. doesn't mean u'll win, by any stretch

Oil_and_gas_RTOC · 2022-09-01T02:10:49+00:00

Don't dip uour pen in company ink, that's just retarded. When it invariably doesn't work out you have to work with that person or quit. It never works out well, like ever... case in point. Just don't do it again.

ZekalMacabre · 2022-09-01T06:59:08+00:00

Never ever be alone with any woman at work, it WILL end badly for you. In this age where false accusations are extremely frequent and just believed immediately, it's not a good idea.

I would absolutely lawyer up. What they did is sexist and discriminatory. They should be punished for it and the only way to punish a large company is to hit them in the bank account. It's the only way they will learn their lesson.

I'm sorry this happened to you.

8nt2L8 · 2022-09-01T15:46:35+00:00

To be specific we did kiss but

You violated an age-old rule: Don't shit where you eat.

thepogopogo · 2022-09-01T05:42:17+00:00

Accept you were a damn fool. Read your contract. Lawyer up if the job was worth enough money to afford one. It depends on the country you're in as to what rights you may have.

In the future never so much as let yourself be alone with a woman at work, always have the door open or another person in the room etc.

hottake_toothache · 2022-09-01T13:02:30+00:00

Take it as a lesson. Keep your guard up around women. Protect yourself at all times.

Any_Drama3272 · 2022-09-01T07:07:58+00:00

Even as a woman, I would never get involved with someone I work with. The point of work is to do a job, not social high school bullshit.

Assuming this is in California since you said big tech, I wouldn’t lawyer up. I would just keep my mouth shut and look for a new job and then when anyone asks what happened, I would claim recession made the work situation tense and now you’re looking for a new job just like a couple thousand other people. With timing like this, it will probably never come up and fade in the background.

Regarding confirmation by contacting previous employer for proof of employment—- all they’re going to know is yes or no in ‘was this person employed from X date to Y date.’

The reason I would not lawyer up is because if you take this to court and anyone who does a background check and happens across existing court records or if it somehow manages to get mentioned online and found in a google search by the next potential employer, you’re stuck that way. Take the L and look somewhere else.

Grouchy_Attention963 · 2022-09-01T05:55:18+00:00

Welcome to the world of being a man. Never get involved with women where they have power over you. Work, getting married etc. never give women power

Ownedby4Labs · 2022-09-01T10:53:51+00:00

You created an untenable situation for management in todays environment.
This is why you NEVER fraternize with co-workers…ever.
E V E R.
Remember the employer creed:

“When there’s trouble, when there’s doubt, fire their ass and toss them out.”

ijustdontcare74 · 2022-09-01T10:43:52+00:00

This is why you never ever shit on your own door step. Never get involved with coworkers. Always keep personal and professional separate.

DenimCryptid · 2022-09-01T13:08:11+00:00

You're probably fucked.

Never under any circumstances should you ever even so much as jokingly flirt with a coworker. No kissing, no dates, no hugging (if they go for one, respond with a side hug), and reject all advances.

Don't do it. Even if they're super hot and tell you they want to suck your dick, DON'T FUCKING DO IT unless you are prepared to risk losing your job.

Easy-Dimension-1844 · 2022-09-01T15:29:39+00:00

Don't get romantically involved with co workers. Please consider this as a lesson learned.

AcadiaLegal6386 · 2022-09-01T02:28:24+00:00

So what I do when I flirt w girls from work is TEXT !! say it forget I it, write it regret it. Have any flirty texts from her ? Like once they send a nude, that sexual harassment BS isn’t even an option anymore.

denvercaniac · 2022-09-01T10:03:32+00:00

Explore your options, certainly.

May you learn from this.

Handle-me-timber · 2022-09-01T11:55:33+00:00

Sounds like you should look into a wrongful termination lawyer. Especially if you have any proof of that consent. Only a lawyer can tell you if you really have a case. If you do get to trial maybe you could get lifetime wage and retire off the back of it.

veedub447 · 2022-09-01T12:10:40+00:00

Depends on what state/nation you are in and the employment laws and your company policies. . It wouldn't hurt to talk to a lawyer as typically the initial consultation is free.

aries0413 · 2022-09-01T13:01:15+00:00

Move on and learn you lesson. Remember you are guilty until proven innocent. The amount of effort/money is probably not worth it.

SteveorJimmyorJack · 2022-09-01T14:43:15+00:00

I don´t know. I would fight the case, not for the job, but for my honor. I would even plant another guy to test her and record, and show in every social media the results. Specialy to splat that in my bosses face next.

sharksville · 2022-09-01T15:58:29+00:00

Yup. Lawyer seem like the way to go. Have her do a polygraph test as well maybe but you can argue that if it was not consensual, why did she report the first time. Why did that kiss happen twice? Also if it was not consensual and sexual harassment, then her first instinct would be to fight back as in she would push you away or leave her mark on you that proves that it was not consensual. Ask for security footage as well. If there’s none produced, take legal action against that company as well. A big tech company, but doesn’t have functional security cameras that can provide video proof of what actually happened.

BaconCatBug · 2022-09-01T18:49:58+00:00

You made your bed, now sleep in it.

You knew the risks, and took the risk regardless. Zero sympathy for idiots who don't protect themselves.

buppyu · 2022-09-01T18:52:48+00:00

Yes, any women can have you fire with a word and with no risk to herself for issuing false allegations. Keep telling me those stories about the "Patriarchy". The people in charge do not give the power to destroy them with a word to other people. If a population has this power, they are clearly the ruling class.

We are so far past equality at this point that it's grotesque. Men are an underclass.

pablitosocool · 2022-09-01T20:18:22+00:00

you got MeToo'ed I'm sorry.

shoetreemoon · 2022-09-01T20:27:35+00:00

Accept. Adapt. Move on. You're screwed. Trust me...I know. Best thing to do is work your network and find a new position that doesn't require cold calling to the company that just terminated you.

mantools · 2022-09-01T20:59:45+00:00

Best thing to do here is learn from your mistake & never shit where you eat in the future.

Professional_Ad8074 · 2022-09-02T00:02:15+00:00

Shit makes me sick. As a female, I get my head chewed off for saying how toxic and insane the metoo movement/ cancel culture is.

I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I wish I had advice. The only thing I can say is, the universe has a better plan for you….but don’t go out without a fight. ❣️

Edit: Always, always go with your gut, not your ego. I can guarantee you’ll end up with a much better job that you love

nomancelad · 2022-09-01T01:48:34+00:00

Move on and don't shit where you work - duhhh.

I would of fired you too. Think about it. As a business, the risk/consequences of 'believing you' even if you actually did nothing wrong and she is lying.. outweighs the benefits of fighting a lie. Be it time spent into looking into it, media coverage, her suing you for not 'believing all women', the headache/stress, etc.

It's like a bar refusing entry to an already intoxicated person (or if they even think you are, but you actually aren't). It's just easier, smarter, smoother... to turn you away because the risks/consequences (maybe cause a scene, start a fight, get fined for serving alcohol to already intoxicated persons, perception of the public in regards to who you let in to your bar etc) outweighs the few bucks you might spend - even if you are the best patron ever, buy everyone beers and spend thousands.

The lesson is simple. It's not fair or 'right'. Knowing this... don't put yourself in that situation ever again. Just like you wouldn't drink and drive (even if you really have to get home to sleep). You then pay for an uber.. or don't go out at all. Be an adult. Be a man.

ninodelumbre · 2022-09-01T11:16:54+00:00

Lawer up, sue her and the company, then avoid westernized female relationships.

No marriage, no girlfriend and no cohabitation, just smash and dash.

Thesushilife · 2022-09-01T16:55:50+00:00

Was this during work hours? If so then they are correct for firing you. No dippy ink on company time.

Also consenting isn’t a catch all because if she felt like she couldn’t say no because of the circumstance then there could even be criminal charges. For example if you continually made advances and she didn’t want them but didn’t tell you out of fear of retaliation or fear of anything else.

Did this happen outside of work? Then you need to show she was interested. Text messages, phone calls, emails or anything else that’s shows outside of work contact. It can’t be work related communication because then your actions weren’t wanted.

Either case if your actions were not wanted then you may want to consider salvaging your reputation.

MRA_TitleIX · 2022-09-01T13:59:23+00:00

If in the USA:

One option could be to file with eeoc if you want to go that route.

I would file for unemployment. They will probably deny it, but if you do sue, you will want to be able to show you tried to limit damages. Similarly, document your job search and apply to jobs every week as if you were trying to meet the unemployment criteria.

Rev_Irreverent · 2022-09-01T17:05:14+00:00

Get a bodycam.

Rahbin_Banx · 2022-09-01T18:15:03+00:00

So she withdrew her consent after the fact? I say you do the same. Sue her personally. Withdraw your consent for her to kiss you as well. Then people will how stupid the company is.

2022-09-01T18:35:39+00:00

Sue the bastards

2022-09-01T19:24:51+00:00

Surely they would need proof to terminate a contract?

Is there a possibility that this was an excuse they needed to manage you out of the business?

BerserkerDude · 2022-09-01T20:08:53+00:00

This doesn't look good at all for you. You could always talk to HR. Unfortunately in today's society, men are always wrong in harassment and or sexual assault allegations. But couldn't hurt to try.

_Denzo · 2022-09-01T20:12:11+00:00

And women complain about “tHe PaTrIaRcHy!!” While pulling this shit always remember: AH

Title	Fired due to false accusations of sexual harassment
Author	shouldIworkremote
Upvotes	391
Comments	90
Date	September 1, 2022 1:13 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/x2u9lz/fired_due_to_false_accusations_of_sexual/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/fired-due-to-false-accusations-of-sexual.1130543 https://theredarchive.com/post/1130543

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