STBXW suicide attempt

dday_throwaway3 · 2022-12-04T12:01:19+00:00

5150 72-hour psychiatric hold. You *must* do this when she attempts suicide. It's to protect you and your kids. Not doing this will be used against you later when she tries something even more extreme, like false DV accusations against you.

You need to file ex parte for a TRO and exclusive use and occupancy of the marital residence. Need to keep her away from the kids until she's completed court-recognized therapy.

> So I informed her it’s happening

Shut. The. Hell. Up. Radio silence. You don't speak to her unless it's about the day-to-day caregiving of the children. And with her out of the house, you won't have anything to talk to her about.

Brian-_S · 2022-12-04T10:52:10+00:00

All ill say is dont stay for the kids, or to stop her. If you're not happy you NEED to keep to your guns and leave now!

If you stay your unhappiness will grow 10 fold because now you don't see a way out.

Keep your friends close and hope for the best.

IF you still have love for your Wife this could be hard, and if she is successful there is always someone who knows the situation and will try to blame you for it. ITS NOT ON YOU BRO. Also if she lasts the divorce STAY FROSTY IF YOU HAVE TO DROP OFF YOUR KIDS TO HER!

My Best Friend is going through this. He stayed and it turned into him trying to take his own life.

EvidencePlz · 2022-12-04T12:07:34+00:00

I'm gonna say something very controversial but she is your STBX which means you already have to think of her as your worst enemy. Don't be fooled and blindsided by this illogical thing called love. It doesn't exist in today's hedonistic, gynocentric and immoral society. Be strong, get your kids out, see immediately if you can get restraining orders and end contact with her. Her wanting to commit suicide is not your circus, not your monkeys.

Gattsama · 2022-12-04T11:42:39+00:00

Sorry you are going through this. Whether she is mental unstable, manipulative, histrionic or a combination of the above; you can not help her. She needs the help of mental health professionals, which hopefully it sounds like she is getting. I work in healthcare, and when these situations come up, the person that threatens suicide should be believed and their partner needs to set firm boundaries and limit contact. You are still married so you are her DPOA, ask her doctors what the best role for you is, while telling them you are proceeding with the divorce.

I am highly biased here, because I work in the hospital I only see the worst possible outcomes, and this is not my specialty. But have cases where the (normally female) kills the kids, attempts suicide or calls for help right after. You can not control her and you are not responsible for her actions/choices.

Just help her get the help she needs and keep the kids safe. Look I might sound like an asshole, but consider getting a TRO until she's better to keep her away from the kids without supervision. Again, my own personal bias is being projected onto your situation.

upvotersfortruth · 2022-12-04T11:21:02+00:00

She needs help. You need to keep your kids safe. That said, there are better subs than this for dealing with family members threatening suicide.

TenuousOgre · 2022-12-04T16:59:55+00:00

Your responsibilities in the order of importance:

Ensure your kids are safe and well
Ensure you are safe and well
Encourage her and her family to get her professional health (she's your STBX and no longer your responsibility)

CB33isGMC · 2022-12-04T20:27:29+00:00

If she doesn’t care about her own life she damn sure won’t care about yours. Play hardball and have her removed asap.

Had similar issues with my ex, even though she was the one constantly talking about wanting a divorce. When I finally pulled the trigger on filing she became suicidal and started behaving erratically. I ignored it and stayed put in the marital home because I thought I was minimizing disruption for the kids.

Long story short, I’m a half inch and a split-second reaction away from being six feet deep. She literally tried to kill me. Learn from my situation bro.

Pachuko_Cadaver · 2022-12-04T21:30:51+00:00

Her threatening to commit suicide unless you stay married is coercive control and is a form of domestic violence. Does she have a history of controlling behaviour?

She needs help. Urgently.

SadWatermelonlesson0 · 2022-12-04T15:58:58+00:00

Yes. Get out. A friend of mine was married to a man who repeatedly threatened suicide. She went to visit him one day after moving out, and just after she left, he shot himself and his dog. She's still suffering that: not only could she have stopped it, but what if he'd decided to take her as well. It's not for you to decide what is manipulation and what is genuine.

Radio-7159 · 2022-12-04T11:48:39+00:00

I had this a long time ago, her family need to help her now. They need to support her, they need to find her the help she needs. take the kids, look after them if she needs serious care, let them see there mother as much as possible if safe to do so. All you can do be understanding, talk to her family/friends if that option is still open.

They will help with the children as well, especially in terms of logistics, picking up and dropping off etc as she may find it difficult to recover if she keeps seeing you. If you wish, you can help indirectly by finding professional therypy and passing the details on to family or fund her treatment through her family or other means.

Don't rush the divorce process or housing situation, take it steady as she'll be in no place to deal with any of that at the moment.

I stayed too long because I thought this would happen and it did. I found her almost gone after spending the night searching for her after she'd gone missing. I will never forget that night. thankfully she survived and is now happy, healthy and a good mother, ironically she has been quite supportive during my recent divorce.

I blamed myself massively at the time, but she needed professional help and there was nothing I could do but look after and protect my children and take some of the load off her until she was back on her feet. it was a horrific experience. I never spoke to anyone about it at the time, I just kinda burried it which is never a good idea. So maybe some councilling for yourself.

C20H25N3O-C21H30O2 · 2022-12-04T19:00:16+00:00

First, make sure your children are safe, then tell her that if she is successful at her suicide next time, you will no longer need a divorce.

Snakygolden · 2022-12-25T20:37:05+00:00

Update bro. How’s it going?

Title	STBXW suicide attempt
Author	FuckMatias
Upvotes	19
Comments	20
Date	December 4, 2022 9:25 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/zc5b5v/stbxw_suicide_attempt/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/stbxw-suicide-attempt.1142999 https://theredarchive.com/post/1142999

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