Why is do people think that getting relationships is easier for the average or below average man than casual?

heartofpeerpressure · 2023-01-13T20:16:04+00:00

what is there to not understand? in relationship there are many other factors to consider which reduces the importance of looks.

a lot of women out there in happy relationships with men whom they wouldn't fuck without getting commitment. sad but true.

blebbyroo · 2023-01-13T20:14:11+00:00

Because with a casual partner you do not care if they are compatible with you or a good person. Their only qualifying factor in most cases is their looks.

In a relationship looks are only a small part of the equation because people you wouldn’t normally go for can become attractive based on their other attributes like personality and humor. You cAre about the personality in a relationship because you spend a lot of time together in a relationship.

This average guys who don’t look bad but also don’t looks great can get relationships because their humor or personality or personal Interests can match well with a woman’s and they can enjoy spending time together

With a hookup you don’t spend time together things like personality have 0 effect except for charisma / confidence because even hot shy guys will struggle to get hookups if it’s not on an app

januaryphilosopher · 2023-01-13T20:51:41+00:00

Because there are way more women who want relationships than casual sex. You're assuming all of them want both and it just depends on how attractive you are.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2023-01-13T20:44:27+00:00

For the average guy a relationship is easier. It’s the below average where it’s a wasteland.

CimZim · 2023-01-13T20:46:29+00:00

What I don't get is how why would it be easier for average men to get relationships but not casual? Like I'm not attractive enough for casual sex but I'm good enough to have a relationship?

Presumably because you have other traits that help make up for the lack of physical hotness. Hookups are just random sex, the only things that matter seem to be hygiene and attractiveness. A longterm relationship involves lots more factors of your actual values and personality.

Why is it assumed that if women don't want you for casual but they would for relationships?

I actually think this should be taken with a grain of salt. It's not really healthy, or good for either partner if you think about it. Could easily lead to a dead bedroom.

Relative_Bee8356 · 2023-01-13T20:30:42+00:00

Because there are more women who are open to relationships than women who are open to casual sex, and there are more men than women looking for casual sex. This is just basic supply and demand.

You can turn it into some silly conspiracy about AF/BB or whatever, or you can just accept that it takes more time and effort to sort through a pool of 500 people than it does through a pool of 50 -- and if there are a whole lot of acceptable options among that big pool, some of them are gonna get ignored solely due to time constraints.

tired_hillbilly · 2023-01-13T20:17:48+00:00

Not a woman, but there's no automod to reply to, so I'm forced to post top-level.

Relationships are easier for less attractive people because more than physical attraction matters. You might be ugly, but you can make up for that in a relationship with personality, ambition, wealth, etc. But for casual sex, all that matters is physical attraction.

Bikerbats · 2023-01-13T20:21:27+00:00

No automod. It's BS man. Few here want to admit it, but most relationships start off as something more casual. I can't count the relationship stories that begin with, "She stayed the night and never left" or some variation thereof.

YaKnowEstacado · 2023-01-13T21:11:56+00:00

I'm not really sure why this is a Q4W because it's usually men I see making this claim.

I agree with you. Most people in current year don't wait for a committed relationship to have sex, so I've never understood how a guy could get a relationship easier than he could get sex.

chalkandapples · 2023-01-13T20:30:46+00:00

There are less women than men that are looking for casual sex than a relationship. So if you're looking for casual sex, you're competing with more men on a smaller pool of women that will be up for stuff like that. In this situation, women can afford to have higher or even unreasonable standards than she can otherwise.

relish5k · 2023-01-13T23:58:56+00:00

In a relationship you have more to offer than your looks. Casual sex, less so.

localmicrodosechamp · 2023-01-13T20:38:46+00:00

because less women want casual than relationships

GhostofCamus · 2023-01-13T20:56:34+00:00

Because almost any guy can comb his hair, and find a woman that will tolerate him enough to be her house simp. Meeting a chick that lusts for you is rare for a lot of men.

Safinated · 2023-01-13T21:29:56+00:00

Because casual is for above average people.

Why suggest something that is unlikely to be successful, instead of something more likely to be successful

suj1290 · 2023-01-14T02:37:42+00:00

Another nonsense belief that is being spread

Technical_Touch1162 · 2023-01-13T09:06:38+00:00

Figured I wouldnt get an amswer to this because itz true.

houstongradengineer · 2023-01-13T22:33:50+00:00

Because it's easier for ALL men, even "above average" men. Not all women are down for casual, but most like to have meaningful relationships in life. This is normal. if you had a daughter, I'll bet my bottom dollar that's what you'd say, too.

RocinanteCoffee · 2023-01-13T20:19:44+00:00

I've never actually heard that but I would assume somewhat differently and that it's easier to have sex with someone than to have a long-term relationship with them because you have a lower threshold for casual/occasional sex with someone rather than having to live with them.

For example, I couldn't live with anyone who smokes in their home or have a long term relationship with a smoker. However, if I am just an occasional guest at their place and they are an occasional guest at mine, we can just run the fan at their place, open a window and maybe he'll agree not to smoke inside while I'm there for a few hours.

Being compatible enough to live together is very different than being able to enjoy a night together.

gobble6gobble9 · 2023-01-13T23:36:21+00:00

Casual hook ups are determined on a narrower set of attributes that usually cannot be changed quickly. The idea is that relationships allow for a broader set of considerations.

odd_cloud · 2023-01-14T01:42:55+00:00

Because for a long term relationship a man’s value is (himself+commitment). This value may be higher than the value of a top guy who is not going to commit.

2023-01-14T13:10:43+00:00

A lot of women don't enjoy casual sex or don't even view sex as a casual thing. Even if that's what media has glamorized, a lot of men and women don't think about sex that way. I barely know any guys that only want casual sex and not a relationship.

Title	Why is do people think that getting relationships is easier for the average or below average man than casual?
Author	Technical_Touch1162
Upvotes	21
Comments	48
Date	January 13, 2023 2:49 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/10aj0wp/why_is_do_people_think_that_getting_relationships/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-is-do-people-think-that-getting-relationships.1148545 https://theredarchive.com/post/1148545

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