Personal Opinion: FDS should be private indefinitely

pickmieshaexorcist · 2021-03-24T13:59:19+00:00

This has been discussed before but I think it was always decided to not go private forever in order to reach more women. The benefit of FDS being easily accessible to women who may need it outweighs the negatives.

Also I’m never too worried about smear campaigns from dudes because it only just drives more women here. So many new members tell the same story: they heard about this horrible man-hating hate sub worse than H itler full of ugly bitter fem cels so they came to see for themselves, only to realize it’s nothing like that and actually a pretty positive and supportive community.

WestAtmosphere · 2021-03-24T23:53:33+00:00

I understand your thought process with this, but like other's have said these "hit pieces" have benefitted us here.

We are making waves, and even if women do not know about the sub in particular the concept of FDS values is spreading like wildfire on social media platforms. All the FDS-like mantra on TikTok for instance has hundreds of thousands of likes, and thousands of shares. I've even seen the sub casually mentioned in the comments, it'd be good for women to be able to do research out of curiosity and see the sub. It's especially important for us to reach young women (18-24~) because this is such a vulnerable group still.

thinktwiceorelse · 2021-03-25T00:21:20+00:00

That would only make scrotes happy to be honest. They want us to be quiet and invisible.

localgirlcult · 2021-03-24T17:16:29+00:00

If it was private women would rarely find it and if they did stumble upon it, most wouldn't bother trying to get in. If you as a person who is not subscribed find it, you just get a page asking to contact the mods and wait for them to allow or deny you entrance. People read that and go...meh, no. You're not gonna bother even that much for a place you can't see and aren't sure you're gonna like.

MistyFiords · 2021-03-25T00:36:34+00:00

I think another important part of FDS being not private is that many women find their way to FDS casually: a peek here and there until they begin to wake up. I had trouble diving in head first when I first encountered FDS because it was so jarring to societal conditioning.

Remaining open will help those casual pickme lurkers in beginning their questioning and learning journey.

QueenNoir21 · 2021-03-25T01:26:32+00:00

I understand what you’re saying but without stumbling across an FDS post I wouldn’t have turned my life around. Even if just one woman benefits from stumbling on this then I think it’s worth it.

rawwwrrrgghh · 2021-03-25T00:52:28+00:00

I think it’s very important for fds to be visible. That’s the only way to reach people. It’s one of the few subs where women are protagonist, where they can speak freely about issues with men, pick mes, society and so on. If the sub goes private than that would mean (to me) that the scrotes won. You can’t change anything by sitting in your basement and talking to your friends. You need to be seen. That’s why so many women went out on the streets fighting for their rights. You need publicity, you need to be open to new members.

Ok-Firefighter-2266 · 2021-03-24T18:54:17+00:00

I don’t think this is necessary. Negative posts written about FDS is how many of us got here so I don’t see it as a bad thing. Also, it would just prevent people from finding us.

Jinxhourglass · 2021-03-24T13:44:04+00:00

How does going private work? There was a sub or two that I was a part of and they went private permanently. Even though I was subscribed before they went private the site said I didn’t have permission to view anymore 😭

melonmagellan · 2021-03-25T03:36:51+00:00

This sub should be accessible to as many women as possible, imo.

abby_ch238 · 2021-03-25T02:22:43+00:00

I think open is better because it takes time to be able to accept that you should have higher standards. I lurked for a while before I actually “got” it. At first I didn’t understand FDS because I thought what is the point of even dating then because men will never like that, they will never find a man this way. That was still my pick me brain. It took a long time til I realized that it wasn’t about men liking us. It was about us liking THEM. FDS wasn’t about finding the right guy so much as it was not staying with the wrong guy. Learning to walk away when disrespected. Took me a while to realize that this was even a possibility. Because we were all brainwashed from a young age to cater to the needs of men no matter what. So I’m glad this space was open and I was able to lurk for months before finally getting that I deserved better, that I deserved respect, and that it is absolutely okay to walk away, no explanation needed. It was great to hear stories over and over again of women sharing their experiences of walking away, because when you start watching others do it, and be happy doing it, then it starts to have an influence on you.

AngryBees88 · 2021-03-25T13:56:19+00:00

I'm glad it's public. It's catching on like wildfire out in the world, and will be just as powerful and life-changing as second-wave feminism. The more eyes we get here, the more eyes we will get here. Scrotes can die all scrunched up with bitterness for all I care.

Magnolia_Mirage · 2021-03-25T00:16:05+00:00

I would like that as well, but the issue is the women who find FDS later. It would be harder for them to even get here.

Unless they do another vetting process like sending a voice message or doing a video call?

worldnotworld · 2021-03-25T12:40:56+00:00

Niche group? Women are 51% of the human race.

FDS is necessary and should never be hidden.

Opening_Candidate471 · 2021-03-24T23:52:05+00:00

Agreed. I have a stalker (Hiiiiiiii survivingthecity!) and the only reason he doesn't harass me on here like he does every other place I post is because he can't be let in here. Would be even better if that fucking piece of shit couldn't see what I post at all, at least in this sub.

AffectionateEchidna5 · 2021-03-25T04:20:34+00:00

If you truly want a more private space considering FDS I think the discord is a lot more private as they do vet you before letting you in. I wanted to join the discord but I am more a typer than a talker and my anxiety would act like a fool.

nieces-pieces · 2021-03-25T01:08:59+00:00

What about an FDS intro sub where the Handbook is posted and just some good cross posts? The members can feel free to post in this space unapologetically and the other shows what we’re about. Sounds like a lot of work for mods though... I’m just spit balling.

LetsGetin_Formation · 2021-03-25T04:46:25+00:00

Sorry, is the community currently private? Who gets access to the private sub?

Summerisle7 · 2021-03-24T14:23:04+00:00

[permanently deleted]

LadyGrimes · 2021-03-24T13:58:26+00:00

I think this is a good idea too because then the scrotes would stop harassing members because they wouldn't be able to see their posts.

Yellowsunflowerlover · 2021-03-24T18:39:12+00:00

I agree.

Title	Personal Opinion: FDS should be private indefinitely
Author	Mind-Objective
Upvotes	142
Comments	58
Date	March 24, 2021 1:32 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/mc5rre/personal_opinion_fds_should_be_private/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/personal-opinion-fds-should-be-private.1189398 https://theredarchive.com/post/1189398

Comments