Men have fewer friends than ever, and it’s harming their health

ABeeBox · 2022-09-21T16:22:41+00:00

I'm a new college student and I've noticed women are either scared of men or completely ignore them.

I was talking to a female friend and a student approached, she completely avoided making any social contact with me, not even a look, and despite me being closer to her, she asked my female friend for directions, completely ignoring me. This was odd, but then I started noticing a lot of social circles just showed absolutely no interest in befriend a male. To make a conversation is a pain, you break your back trying to carry a conversation and they show no interest the other way. If they have any question, they'd ask another girl on the other side of the table than ask any of the guys sitting beside her.

It just looks so surreal.

delocalelectron · 2022-09-21T11:16:40+00:00

First thing you're likely to encounter on forming potentially long-term relationships with a woman is that she has some pretty strong negative views on your long-term friends...

elebrin · 2022-09-21T13:05:28+00:00

It asks why this got worse in the last couple of decades, and the answers include "socialization of young boys", "men share their feeling less than women", "traditional gender norms"

Are they claiming that modern men suffer more from traditional gender norms than they did in the '90s ?

hectorgarabit · 2022-09-21T12:11:07+00:00

They quite literally took all our spaces for bonding away. Any place that we had to be together away from the pressures of women has been systematically targeted and been either removed or forced to become ‘inclusive’.

This being Vox, I’m only surprised they didn’t make the article all about the negative effects of this on women. Also PMSL, they’re obsessed with this ‘socialisation’ bollocks aren’t they? They simply can’t accept that we may be different because then the floodgates open - if we’re inherently different they are then forced to concede that might be part of the difference in choices/outcomes.

It’s like talking to religious people. There’s no real point arguing - there are simply articles of faith.

thepogopogo · 2022-09-21T18:18:25+00:00

Men's friendships where destroyed on purpose. To make us all good compliant money makers who won't organize or cause no problems.

crz8956 · 2022-09-21T12:16:34+00:00

Ah, Vox, that left-fem outlet? Let me guess, men are somehow blamed on having less friends, and it hurts women in some way, yes?

But, Vox aside, there is something going on with it. I am not ages old, but I can see that people spend far more time online than socializing. I think three major factors evolved.

Economics - more inflation, less money you effectively get -you need to work more -you have less free time.

Covid -self-explanatory. Isolation is always a trial to friendship like any "geographical" separation.

And, probably fear mongering, (not always unbased, alas), that lead to escapism - a desire to curl up in your personal safe space - wich leads to overuse of social networks, wich also robs you from real life interactions.

I sometimes envy old ladies of my house, that get to play cards every Friday on a bench in the yard. Old hags have a lot of time, and look quite happy just chilling out, gossiping and talking to each other. Because they do not need to work anymore.

OldEgalitarianMRA · 2022-09-21T11:05:16+00:00

Vox: Feminist propaganda: Skip

It's like reading Two X.

guytime23 · 2022-09-21T16:10:09+00:00

I love all of you guys .

LettuceBeGrateful · 2022-09-21T18:42:54+00:00

Step 1: Cats and dogs.

Step 2: Find what you love to do.

Step 3: Go out and do stuff you love with others.

Step 4: Come home every night to animals who love you. People come and go. Your pets will be right where you left them.

TracyMorganFreeman · 2022-09-21T19:56:38+00:00

Well feminists take umbrage at men having male spaces.

JosephSmithSux · 2022-09-21T14:53:28+00:00

It's better to die alone than with a knife in your back.

Universalsupporter · 2022-09-21T17:22:49+00:00

I’m actually getting ready to see a buddy today. 30 minute coffee. First time I’ve done anything socially since January

Huffers1010 · 2022-09-21T21:57:19+00:00

One argument I have with that piece is the repeated claim - well, not even claim, statement - that the characteristics of men which make them lonely are entirely created by society. I suspect they are, to at least some extent, much as the stereotypical characteristics of women are also probably created by society to at least some extent, but that's certainly far from the whole story.

Another concern is that some of the things which make people (particularly men) lonely are discussed solely in a negative context. Self-reliance and stoicism is not intrinsically bad; everyone (men and women) needs some amount of it, and society as a whole needs some amount of it too. I've met a few people who could do with a bit more of both stoicism and self-reliance, particularly the more outspoken variety of hardline feminist who often seem very keen to blame the world for everything they don't like, and very reluctant to take any responsibility for their own lot in life.

Possibly what's causing this is the tendency, which is quite frankly a straightforward gender prejudice, to see stereotypically masculine, but not necessarily negative things, only in their negative light. There is no attempt, for instance, to examine the world's reaction to men's tendency to stoicism and independence separately from that man's own experience of it.

In short, it's begging the question in the formal sense: the article doesn't so much ask questions but repeatedly claim that masculine behaviour is bad because of the badness of masculine behaviour, with no attempt to caveat or understand the underlying realities. It's spectacularly lazy writing.

IR0NxLEGEND · 2022-09-21T22:34:53+00:00

And my GF seriously wonders why I play video games at 25. Has little to do with the actual games, it’s all about talking with my friends. ps rock and stone

Outrageous_Fondant12 · 2022-09-22T02:23:01+00:00

I never wanted a 100 friends. Gimme like 2-3 good, like minded dudes to chill with and do adventures shit. Truth is at 40, I don’t have any close friends. I value reliability but get let down by people bailing on plans or them not even trying to hold up their end of the friendship.

I have a shit load of hobbies/interests too, so it’s not for a lack of trying or being dull.

2022-09-21T22:38:05+00:00

Since when did Vox give a shit about men’s rights? I thought they were super feminist and shit

2022-09-21T13:34:29+00:00

Man can bond through hobbies, fitness, passion and purpose.

Woman can only bond because they are the same altogether. Man are more individuals that's why less friends but less friends also means true friends and lifelong bonds.

Friendship of woman are often very fragile and don't last as long as male friendships.

modernmanadvicecom · 2022-09-21T20:26:29+00:00

This is true. We, as human beings, are social creatures by nature. We need a community, a family, and a tribe to belong to. We are not wolves. Although some of us do genuinely enjoy our solitude and walk the Earth mostly alone, human connection is highly beneficial to our mental health.

Isolation can be detrimental and harmful to one's mental health. And unfortunately, men over their 30s are finding it harder and harder to create and maintain social groups.

However, this is generally true for people in general. We live in a highly individualistic society so genuine, unconditional, and deep human connection is rare.

If you look at the manifestos of most, if not all, mass shooters, they have completely isolated themselves to a point of disgust for humanity. The problem isn't gun control, it is mental health. And we, as a society, are poorly addressing it.

Modern Man Advice

MrRonchito · 2022-09-21T16:13:46+00:00

Very relatable... You can add relationships as well.

AverageHorribleHuman · 2022-09-22T02:06:59+00:00

I haven't had an actual friend for over a decade. Aside from my chiweenie and wife

Necessary-Marketing8 · 2022-09-22T06:30:28+00:00

Men cannot catch a break in this world.

SecTeff · 2022-09-22T10:41:42+00:00

There us a lot of complaining about women in this thread but we also need to own our interactions with other men.

What are we doing to improve the friendships with other men in our lives?

Are we making an effort to call old friends or text a friend?

Are we creating an environment where it’s ok to befriend other men and be open about things?

It down to us to fix this!

thepogopogo · 2022-09-21T20:50:31+00:00

Cartoon strip claims masculine norms are to blame for fewer friendships and worse health outcomes, also shows how male friendships have been declining over the past three decades...at the same time masculinity has been rejected by society so feminist capitalism can sell us more shit we don't need.

mechajutaro · 2022-09-21T18:59:01+00:00

Men have fewer friends than ever, and it’s harming their health

Let's call The Mansophere out for its role in all of this. Entirely too many of us have been retreating into fantasy worlds of video games and YouTube videos, then when reading headlines like the ones in The OP and screeching "Look!!! This is another example of how feminism/Gynocentrism/Cultural Marxism has done us in!!! The fact that we ourselves aren't getting out from behind our keyboards, and spending more time meeting up in person out in reality isn't at least 50% responsible for the fact that we're have fewer friends than ever"

Drougen · 2022-09-21T20:48:53+00:00

I'd believe it. I've had like 2-3 "best" friends at any given time in my life. Recently lost one to religion, too. :(

Isair81 · 2022-09-22T03:24:14+00:00

I used to have a small, but loyal friend group. We’d get together to play board-games, D&D eat junk food, drink beer and have a good time.

But.. that was years ago now. These days I drink alone and work to pass the time..

Commercial_Invite_84 · 2022-09-22T04:55:17+00:00

These studies don't count online friends

I have a whole guild of friends on wow classic

parasitius · 2022-09-22T07:23:14+00:00

I'm a 40s male digital nomad, and I don't really have time just for my basics of work, gym, and personal study. I don't want or need any new friends, but am facing the nightmare of repeatedly ending up with what I don't know how else to describe but male stalkers. So sick and tired of it and don't understand how I need to change my body language to make it clear I will tolerate a 5 min chat but don't want to take things further. Fuck

Just wanted to mention this completely different angle to see if anyone can relate or extrapolate something from the data point

Title	Men have fewer friends than ever, and it’s harming their health
Author	NeoNotNeo
Upvotes	418
Comments	71
Date	September 21, 2022 10:56 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/xk1mjt/men_have_fewer_friends_than_ever_and_its_harming/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/men-have-fewer-friends-than-ever-and-its-harming.1208721 https://theredarchive.com/post/1208721

Comments