Been single for three years, how do I stop my frustration turning into redpill rage?

eefr · 2023-09-13T10:30:53+00:00

Why does being single make you feel that red pill content is real and valid? Ask yourself what attracts you to the red pill, and that will help you reframe your thinking to avoid falling into that trap.

Which, by the way, is unlikely to make you any happier or less frustrated. Red pill people are a miserable bunch for the most part.

I'd also advise you to stop looking at red pill content as that will just infect your mind and increase your rage and bitterness.

eatfleshdrinkblood · 2023-09-13T09:12:00+00:00

My advice is stay the hell away from all red/black pill,incel,MGTOW,manospere content all together and if you need it therapy.

Aggravating_Crab3818 · 2023-09-13T13:20:38+00:00

You know what? "Redpill" does work - on broken Codependents who have either been abused as a child or watched one of their parents abusing the other. Because it's just emotional and financial abuse in disguise. You can hear all about it in the Narcissistic Abuse fb groups and reddit subs.

"It's funny how these guys who have never met, from all over the world, are doing and saving the same kind of things. WTF? It's like they're reading from the same book or something. Or something....."

not-a-dude-at-all · 2023-09-13T10:31:50+00:00

By having things to do in your life.

daddyslittlefuckslut · 2023-09-13T09:35:47+00:00

By remembering that women don't owe you anything.

I know this isn't helping, but why would you throw an incel tantrum about being single? It sounds like you feel entitled to a relationship.

Focus instead on what YOU bring to a woman's table, that's a much better place to start.

One_Potential5404 · 2023-09-13T08:47:38+00:00

how old are you?

spicytuna12391 · 2023-09-13T17:38:36+00:00

Don't fall for redpill. It's designed to keep you single. Redpillers are NOT trying to help you, they like to continue to make you feel like shit and insecure, that way you can keep giving them views on their videos ($$$) and hopefully end up paying hundreds of dollars on their "classes". Redpill WANTS you to remain single.

softnmushy · 2023-09-13T23:04:14+00:00

Stay away from social media and manosphere stuff. Redpill rage and incel rage didn't exist until social media. (There definitely was misogyny, but it was more tied to patriarchy and traditional ways of devaluing women.)

Try to form friendships with women your age. That will really help in preventing you from falling in love on the first date and becoming super needy.

Redpill stuff is toxic and will just make you feel worse. And if you use redpill ideas to get women, it will create a toxic relationship. There are tons of posts nowadays from women who had to break up with their man because he started believing redpill stuff. No self-respecting, healthy woman will tolerate that stuff. It's super unattractive.

The only thing in the redpill that is worthwhile is lifting weights, having a good job, and being self-confident. There. Now you know every single positive that the redipll has to offer. You don't need to go there ever again.

LaReina227 · 2023-09-14T00:46:27+00:00

Ive been single and celibate for 8 years, by choice. As an abuse survivor, I look at couples around me and they've all settled and they're all miserable. Then I remember why I don't do this co-dependent bullshit and counted myself lucky. But if it's purely about sex, go hook up with someone. Level with her and treat her with respect during the exchange. You'll be fine.

Larry-Man · 2023-09-14T03:22:06+00:00

Friend, I am a woman. I’ve been through so much abuse that it’s not even worth talking about. Why externalize it? I don’t blame myself for the shitty situations I’ve been in. Nor do I blame men as a whole. I do enjoy “sipping male tears” memes because the amount of shitty men out there absolutely justify being bitter. Most people are shitty. But I haven’t closed my heart and I’m still friends with men and also respect men as individuals even if I’m jaded.

Don’t let bad experiences fester into unhealthy dynamics. Don’t let the shitty people take away your joy. Just learn what boundaries you do and do not want to have as a person and stand firm.

Men are not my enemy and women are not yours. We are not adversaries. We ultimately (I like to think) want to be loved in spite of our flaws and cherished for our strengths.

XhaLaLa · 2023-09-14T10:54:42+00:00

You recognize that women are human beings who — like other human beings — have no obligation, moral or otherwise, to date or have sex with anyone.

I don’t even know what more there is to say. If you actually understand that, rage over rejection and ideologies about punishing them for that or trying to trick them into it would not hold any appeal whatsoever, and would in fact be entirely repugnant.

Women. Are. Human. That is literally the answer.

LongNeo · 2023-09-16T17:17:34+00:00

Do an online course. Seek a hobby. But don't consume repill content. Its poison.

Free_Essay7789 · 2023-09-13T14:42:40+00:00

If you feel rage because you're single, it's because you don't like yourself. I have been single for a long (nearly 5 years) time and i feel fine. And I'm 24 years old. 11 years younger than you.

I think most men are miserable when they're single because they are never taught how to form strong friendships, how to have fun without booze and escorts, how to give back to the community and how to be emotionally stable. And they project this onto single women and think they're miserable as well.

Their idea of a "successful man" is one who has sex with hundreds of girls and has lots of money. And when they are unable to achieve this toxic fantasy, they feel like they've lost in life. Red pill then directs this sense of failure to become anger towards women. How dare they reject him when every movie he watched since childhood tells him they'd fall for him? RP then teaches them bizarre notions of how all those women who rejected him would hit the wall at 35 and he'll blossom into a handsome swan. They keep feeding that delusion and so men's idea of a "successful man" stays unchanged. He just postpones his delusion of success. Movies taught him he'll be successful at 35. The RP teaches him he'll peak at 45-50 and all the women who rejected him would have their comeuppance.

Imagine what happens when this man reaches 45, and his chances dwindle even further (as they do for every human being after they age). Mid life crisis, thoughts of suicide, depression, anger at those nasty feminists who still don't want him.

What men need to learn is to dispel the myth of the successful casanova from their minds. You don't become high value by degrading women. And women don't become low value by having sex. Sexual encounters or "body count" do not determine your value. Your value is determined by how good of a person you are, how much you benefit society, how kind you are to the people around you, how mentally and physically healthy you are. Money and sex is extremely superficial. You can have all the money and sex in the world and it wouldn't make you a better person. You can't escape who you are by having sex, marriage or by money. Where ever you go, there you are!

If you're not happy with yourself, nothing can help you or make you happy. Single women are happier than single men. Women also live longer if they're single. While men live longer and are happier in marriage. And the reason is because women have become more well rounded after feminism. We already knew how to take care of ourselves, how to cook, clean etc. Feminism taught us how to work and make money. While men know how to make money, they have neglected learning things they call "womanly chores".

They don't know how to clean their rooms and how to maintain their homes. Your homes and the environment around you dictate your happiness.

Second reason is that women are more empathetic and emotionally intelligent than men. Mother nature blessed men with physical prowess and she blessed women with emotional intelligence. As a result of that women form stronger and more dependable friendships. We don't just get together to booze and watch naked girls, like men do. We share our experiences, support each other and help each other grow.

Tl;dr: men should give up the idea of the "successful man" being someone who is exorbitantly rich and surrounded by naked women, or someone who is the patriarch of a postcard perfect family. You need to learn some things from women, namely how to take care of yourselves and your home, and how to form strong supportive friendships. You also need to develop more emotional intelligence and empathy for people in general. Study, work, learn new hobbies, travel and talk to people, give back to the community. If you're unhappy with yourself, you'll stay unhappy no matter whom you sleep with or how much money you make. Life is beautiful. You just haven't scratched the surface because you're still living in the delusion that there are only two kinds of a "successful life"- rich and surrounded by girls or the patriarch of a nuclear family. Any man who deviates from this is quickly labelled a loser by red pill and patriarchy in general. Also it's ironic how they hate women and yet their idea of a successful man is dependent on how much women like them lol.

TurtleTonyG · 2023-09-13T20:48:00+00:00

I don't know why this popped up for me, but here you go.

I'm 40. I'm in the 1% income bracket, and I'm good-looking. I dress well, and if you meet me in person, I'm charismatic. I have a high body count, and I'm also divorced (never cheated, I was cheated on).

I really dislike women from a dating point of view. In fact, I can safely say that I'm considering chemical castration.

I love them from a friends only category, but I honestly don't trust them like I'd trust open and discolored gas station sushi.

They're horrible in relationships. They cheat profusely and rename it to justify it. I have stories for days that are both mine, personal friends, family, and clients... both male and female, that have gotten me to the conclusion that I need to hang it up.

The number of times I have been manipulated into sleeping with someone who has a partner and blatantly lied to me is eight times. I have slept with eight women who lied about their status. I have turned down way more who were honest.

Now, before I get downvoted for stating the truth, I'll gladly say that men cheat all the time. That way, we can prevent the deflection. I'm glad you're the type of person who doesn't cheat reader. Go you.

Here's the kicker. I don't trust any of you. I've been through therapy, and I know the last girlfriend who unknowingly cuckold'ed me by fucking people in my career social group was abnormal. I know not every wife has emotional affairs that leave to physical.

However, both happened to me back to back, and every one of y'all I've entertained since has had red flags more glaring than mine, that I don't even want to try.

Guess what, OP. It's ok. It's ok to have no desire to be with them. It's ok not to trust them. You are not flawed. You just have 35 years of experience telling you to protect yourself.

I will hire, train, and mentor women. I will be platonic and best friends with women. I will be respectful and kind to women. I see them as people. However, I don't want shit to do with them romantically because I don't trust them with my most important possession I own, my peace. If that makes me redpill, fine. To me, it makes me logical and defensive.

Good luck bro.

TelevisionGloomy5458 · 2023-09-13T14:12:55+00:00

What are you frustrated about? Is it just sexual frustration? If so, go to a prostitute. If it’s mental, go to a male therapist.

GarlicCarlin · 2023-09-21T15:24:30+00:00

You, go the TRP subreddit, read the side bar chronologically.

Forget about everything and start applying what you learned.

It’s as easy as that, the red pill works if you don’t go autistic about it.

KindlyPizza · 2023-09-13T17:28:01+00:00

Look for ride or die supporter from your circle.

I have two friends who are currently looking for their forever partner. One is 35 M like you and one is 39 F. They got rejected a lot (before you asked why don't they get together, these two while both are lovely as individuals, are completely poison to each other if they were in romatical relationship) but they still put themselves out there. Both offline and online. With me as their faithful supporter.

They can tell me anytime they need to vent, they can ask me for nice dating places, possible events, etc. And I am happy researching and doing that for them.

Can call me wing woman, but I just like to be called hype-woman. Look for your hype-woman/hype-man from your personal circle. You are Frodo, look for your Sam (or) Samantha Gamgee.

Huge-Revolution9177 · 2023-09-14T16:41:41+00:00

Genuine question, what are you doing to put yourself out there to meet someone?

Title	Been single for three years, how do I stop my frustration turning into redpill rage?
Author	sansknickers
Upvotes	13
Comments	208
Date	September 13, 2023 6:04 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/16hf22y/been_single_for_three_years_how_do_i_stop_my/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/been-single-for-three-years-how-do-i-stop-my.1231645 https://theredarchive.com/post/1231645

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