Why you shouldn't fap.

2011-02-10T15:55:06+00:00

I've actually came to a similar conclusion after analysing my own behaviour and reading a few articles on hormones and the science of fapping. But I thought it was just me. Do you know how it all started? We were spending two weeks in the cottage with a bunch of friends prior to a social event. I had to share my bedroom with a number of people and because were were always out and about during the day I have had zero privacy thus unable to fap. I must say I did not even think much about it as my mind was preoccupied with other things anyway.

On the day of the social event I'm introduced to this HB9 with a face of an angel and a body of a model. After a quick chat and a few IOIs I'm off to meet and greet others. Later on that evening I see her again from across the hall sharing a bottle of champagne with her friends. At this point I start getting vivid ideas of what I could do to her and this feeling of 100% calm and confidence comes over me like I have never experienced before in my life... As she gets separated from her friends I make a move. I make eye contact from some distance, she smiles, I approach her and just kiss her right there and then in front of whoever was watching and she kisses me back. Once we stop she panics with this WTF look and walks outside into the garden. I follow... She still can't get her mind around it. She has her hands on her face in disbelief and keeps on pacing around. I grab her by her waist and this time she goes for a kiss. I then take her back to my room and fuck her silly. We then lie and bed and think WTF... The only downside is that after you abstain from fapping for 2 weeeks cuming is followed by this feeling of getting your balls smashed with a brick which spreads onto your abdomen... Well, at least for me it did.

Anyhow, this was the first time I ever did something like this and I kept on wondering how on earth I had the balls to just go and pull her in front of everyone like that considering I was pretty sober at that time as well... I tried going another week without fapping but failed. I'll try again now I know there is something to this.

-edit-

By the way, I think I do fap a bit too much whether I'm in a relationship or not. I work online in privacy of my own office and my work does actually require me to look at porn every other day. I got into the habit of doing it way too often, usually a few times a day just because I can and so easy to do. I can see how this might not work for somebody with a healthy fapping lifestyle.

RaiseYourGlass · 2011-02-10T13:38:28+00:00

TL;DR: Social isolation and porn reinforce each other. That is, being isolated leads to seeking escape and gratification by oneself, which can mean porn addiction, which lowers self esteem and confidence, which makes one more socially anxious...and so on.

gunner05 · 2011-02-10T12:03:21+00:00

wow, now it all makes sense. even though the article might be overblown (and the author suspect), but masturbation/porn has had such a negative effect on my life. It took me a long time to admit this. I don't seek out relationships since i have my hand, and I want instant results in all my tasks at hand/endeavorers.

I found the only time i stopped masturbating is when I have people around. but since i don't have people around me, i keep doing it. it's a fucking bad cycle.

This is my cry for help seddit :(

Troebr · 2011-02-10T12:34:05+00:00

There are other articles about this online, basically after about 1 week without fapping you have a testosterone peak, then it goes down a little.

But yes, don't overfap, it kills the motivation, just like playing too much world of warcraft, drinking too much or whatever addiction you might have. But here there are hormones involved.

tsibutsibu · 2011-02-10T19:09:29+00:00

I agree with everyone that 'not fapping' might not work for everyone but I gotta say, it works for me. If I go a week without masturbating, my social skills increase consistently everyday. I've done this several times, and the effect always seems to be that I become increasingly extroverted each day I don't fap.

There was definitely a point where I was addicted to porn. Fapping twice a day makes orgasm... not intense. It got to the point that I had so short circuited myself masturbating meant bringing my semi-flacid dick to a pitifully weak orgasm after five minutes. Made me feel sad.

I've also had sex in this porn fiend mode and the only way to orgasm is to super meditate on the porn you've found hot recently while plugging away with a tool threatening to break down on you at any moment. That made me pretty sad too.

If you haven't, try not fapping for a week and see what it does to you.

nikolaiFTW · 2011-02-10T23:25:18+00:00

200 gigs... gone. I have a feeling I'm gonna regret that.

dandy_in_cyberspace · 2011-02-10T19:12:11+00:00

I see it says that if I don't masturbate I will improve my sense of humour. How long do I have to go without masturbating before I develop a joke? Say I don't fap for a week does this mean I might be able to come up with a serviceable knock knock joke? Then if I don't masturbate for say a month might I be able to come up with a perhaps a 2 minute sketch for Saturday Night Live?

I'm still not sure how this would work in practice. Does mutual masturbation count? Is it only live action porn? How about just getting a bit excited near someone?

I see it says it not masturbating improves "manliness" and cures depression and social anxiety. Does that mean shy, effeminate depressed men are masturbating too much to videos of attractive women when they could be having sex with these women?

So many questions.

pibbman · 2011-02-10T19:45:38+00:00

I like how everyone keeps talking about testosterone level when the article is talking about dopamine sensitivity being the factor at play here. How many people actually read the article?

sockthepuppetry · 2011-02-10T08:59:16+00:00

I wish the internet in general came with TL;DR's

smg1t · 2011-02-10T11:18:39+00:00

It bases all this on porn addicts and generalises to everyone.

Thats like saying due to a fat person feeling more healthy after cutting down on eating we should all cut down on eating.

RedErin · 2011-02-10T14:31:01+00:00

I was never a porn addict, but I stopped watching it and I did notice those effects.

strangerdream · 2011-02-11T02:00:19+00:00

So if you're an introvert, you're probably fapping too much?

surfnsound · 2011-02-10T17:37:53+00:00

I keep hearing people bring up this "quit masturbating to make your game better," and quite frankly, I think it's bullshit.

I'm not basement dweller--I go out every chance I can, and I pull too. But I also jack off once or twice a day. I have a high sex drive, and it helps me relax.

For me, I don't think I could go out without jacking off a few hours beforehand. When there's no overwhelming desire to get laid, I can focus on having fun, not trying too hard, and just being chill--which in turn makes me more likely to get laid.

I fail to see how not masturbating will help your game... in fact, I think it could HURT it, by making you anxious, and so horny you are desperately trying to pull, rather than doing what matters---having fun and living in the moment, with no pressure on what happens at the end of the night.

But maybe that's just me.

chumpta · 2011-02-10T08:23:05+00:00

ugh i completely 100% agree with this but i seriously cannot stop. i've tried so many times and i still wind up giving in at least once a day. sedditors plz leave some tips for not jacking it, if youve got any.

2011-02-10T16:45:25+00:00

The more you do it, the more it increases your testosterone levels.

If you have to not fap to improve oneself, there's other things going on, or it's a personal issue. Whether I do or don't, never matters. If I do, I often want to more with my woman. If I don't, then I don't and certainly don't care. I've met countless guys who claim to not fap or have sex with their woman because it messes with their workouts, too.

COME ON! That's barbarian shiz right there! You eat, sleep, lift and fuck, what else do you need to turn on the jets of testosterone in your body?!

The only thing you may do as it relates to porn and fapping is descensitize you to real women, that you are likely capable of pulling. If you are in to the abnormal pornstars and won't go meet those women IRL or aren't getting them, then you will likely improperly program yourself to ONLY be turned on by big titted, big-assed, dumb, perfect pornstars and not REAL WOMEN, like the 95% out there. If that happens, it's no different than women programming themselves that TRUE LOVE is that which they find in cliched romance novels.

The mind will, like Pavlov's dogs, program itself to identify one with the other, improperly. If you are, however, attracted to your gf, wife or you regularly meet the kind of women you fantasize about when you fap, then you will be MORE attracted to them, NOT less.

I have a friend that could help women who might have been against giving blowjobs or just never into giving them, and turn them into women that LOVE giving blowjobs. Hypnosis and NLP work.

zombieburglur · 2011-02-10T18:39:27+00:00

Awesome I've been wondering about his for sometime. A few years ago I gave up fapping for lent, just to see if I could. And over those 40 days I found a new girl. Hung out with people a lot more, felt better about myself and even got laid for the first time. Glad somebody found something to support the idea.

2011-02-10T20:43:50+00:00

I'll just leave this here.

strangerdream · 2011-02-11T02:52:15+00:00

I'm an introvert myself and my social skills suck, and fap pretty much every other day. I'm going to try this and write up to seddit if it made any difference.

krymson · 2011-02-10T12:05:57+00:00

this is more about addiction in general rather than masturbation.

kkraemer · 2011-02-10T12:04:39+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Rhettsta · 2011-02-10T10:04:00+00:00

I've had this theory for ages but i could be totally wrong. Testosterone is produced by the testes, the balls so when you masturbate for whatever reason it depletes your body of testosterone lowering your confidence and so on.

Agile_Cyborg · 2011-02-10T14:07:38+00:00

Theraderps are preachers foisting addicts about like skeery demons.

2011-02-10T14:09:23+00:00

VERY interesting article. I also felt much better in my abstinence phases but I thought that feeling would be superstitious and soon I became addicted again. Maybe I'll do some further experiments with abstinence... Thanks!

kurfu · 2011-02-10T14:26:30+00:00

What is the definition of "addict"?

Seriously... do you need a certain number of pics or movies in your collection to qualify for the title?

capzncommando · 2011-02-10T14:48:33+00:00

I'm a guy and I guess I'm a late bloomer or something because I never actually figured out how to fap until last year (I'm in my early 20s). I finally managed to do it thanks to the awesome power of lube.

Anyway, since I figured it out, I've been fapping every day since fapping is awesome. But the results on me mentally aren't anything like the article says.

I feel like I actually have more energy, I'm doing great socially and at work, and I'm way better at not giving a shit. Overall, everything has been really good and I especially love all the fapping.

So while this article might be true for some people, I don't think it's true for everyone.

small-penis · 2011-02-10T21:58:14+00:00

Is this why women talk too much?

rotund · 2011-02-10T22:25:39+00:00

I used to play sports and hear this all the time "Don't jerk it before the big game!"... I dunno about that, everything I've read says that pulling your pudd doesn't reduce testosterone. I certainly didn't notice a difference in my playing abilities if I hadn't beat off recently.

I deal with a lot of stress on a daily basis, so I find it to be a good stress relief. I think it comes down to 2 things:

Being ashamed of it
Being reliant on it for happiness

I don't think masturbation (or any other part of your sexuality) is something that you should be ashamed of. Life is so short, why should you let yourself feel shame with something you enjoy? If you rely on it for happiness, then you really should find something else to make you happy.

ProbablyNotToday · 2011-02-10T23:08:43+00:00

Although there are benefits there are also some negatives. I can personally attest to the fact that this chart (internet porn) exists for a reason.

Although not masturbating can make you more confident and get you to talk to more people, it can also make you extremely violent. Back when I was 18 I was 6'1" and 205 with less than 10% body fat and after not masturbating for just over 2 weeks, I ended up beating the living fuck out of 6 guys. Long story short, I was at the liquor store with a friend in Canada, waited outside since I was underage, 6 guys (1 guy I recognized who bullied me in school) stepped out of a car and I started shit with them. Testosterone can make you do some crazy shit and not all of it involves women or creativity.

2011-02-10T23:41:25+00:00

LOL, seriously lets not take this pickup thing too far. Give up porn and jerking off, thats a big pass.

mynameisBORAT · 2011-02-11T10:22:18+00:00

on probably day 13 or 14 no fapping. never been better. my ability to be socially dominant has sky rocketed. I am controlling conversations and being "alpha", like never before. I am actually feeling interested in starting a relationship, which is weird because I'm a one night stander and FWB guy.

furthermore, women seem magnetized by a man with pent up sexual energy. I was at a party last night and this legit HB kept making this longing sexual eye contact. Due to logistics I only # closed, but its really not often that a legit hottie gives me the "I want to fuck you look" over and over.

I have performed this experiment, abstaining for fapping, a few times, for about a week each, and each time the overwhekming positive changes in my mind and body have convinced me that the phenomenon the article describes is real. don't fap for 2 weeks and tell me how fucking good you feel.

now, getting to the 2 weeks is your own issue. removing /nsfw from my homepage has been a big step.

MrPantaloons · 2011-02-11T20:35:24+00:00

This is total bullshit. There is no physiological difference between the dopamine released in someone who masturbates all the time and someone who has sex all the time. There may be differences in psychological issues surrounding each person, but that has nothing to do with the literal act.

Downvote.

2011-02-12T12:50:21+00:00

Hey guys, there was an Iama a couple of months ago from a guy that hadn't fapped in a month, I tried to find it but I couldn't.

Anyways, the article did hit some good points.

When I was living in the dorms on college, I couldn't fap because I had a room mate. My voice was deeper, I was always hung, and I was a compulsive socializer.

Now that i commute from home, I wank off around three to four times a day, and I don't feel this pressure to socialize as I once did.

Again, it may be due to other factors, but regulating masturbation habits would be fucking A.

Even if it doesn't do anything, you don't feel as pathetic about yourself watching about 15 - 30 minutes of porn a day.

Shpox · 2011-02-12T12:54:01+00:00

Goodbye Tanner Mayes then. What I found interesting was if I'm in social environments or engaging is all of which the article outlines, MY desire to fap goes to down. I simple don't have time for that shit. Might be the first step rather than putting down the fap.

TempSeddit · 2011-02-18T13:00:13+00:00

So does this regard the actual act of ejaculation or the whole process altogether. Wouldn't ramping yourself up to right before release and stopping before ejaculation give you a boost of testosterone?

Up-The-Butt_Jesus · 2011-02-10T20:15:36+00:00

Hey look, an article full of pseudoscience and anecdotes!

cyber_rigger · 2011-02-10T14:54:52+00:00

Mermaid man, now age 94

disagrees

kelekell · 2011-02-10T16:50:14+00:00

I tried fapping to the lion but it needed bigger tits.

avoutthere · 2011-02-10T15:59:13+00:00

This is just the latest version of "you'll go blind!".

2011-02-11T01:51:29+00:00

I'm skeptical of anything from PsychologyToday

(I'm a psych major who reads a lot of published journal articles and sees a lot of fake psych articles)

2011-02-10T15:35:49+00:00

The annecdoteal evidence in the article doesn't make any sense. It says to cut down on fapping and then you will get out in society and meet people. Some of the addicts in this are now meeting people and having great sex. So the person is right back to gratification again. So fapping for fun is bad but sex for fun is okay because according to this at least you have one other person involved in gratification at the same time. This is a poor article.

Title	Why you shouldn't fap.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	146
Comments	123
Date	February 10, 2011 6:47 AM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/filko/why_you_shouldnt_fap/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-you-shouldnt-fap.1315458 https://theredarchive.com/post/1315458

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