I just got dumped a few weeks ago. Here are the resources that have been helping me get through the breakup. Good for people with oneitis.

MrStinky · 2013-10-09T03:27:53+00:00

I've been in 4 actual LTR's. The quality of woman I have been with has never gone down and has always gone up from the first girl who I thought was irreplaceable. It gets better. Trust me

deployed_soldier · 2013-10-09T01:14:53+00:00

Commenting so i have this for later. Great first article..

Got left by my wife while deployed...wish I had this back then...

everydayathursday · 2013-10-09T08:16:07+00:00

1 piece of advice in this thread: DO NOT CONTACT HER.

Pibe_de_Oro · 2013-10-09T06:57:16+00:00

6 months after a messy break up: We had a great 6 year relationship, she dumps me for another guy who immediately dumps her, because she lied to him about the whole boyfriend thing. Kudos to the guy.

One thing that fuels me immensely is to get the upper hand on her. I work out more, I eat better, I dress and style myself better than before. I made it out of there ok, I am currently getting my mojo with women back, although I still don't have any feelings for them. At least I hook up. Everytime she pulls the "Hey, how you're doing? Been thinking about you lately" I smile. She has lost all of her charm on me. She was a great girl during those 6 years, total scumbag break up, I don't give a shit anymore (except for her titties. God I miss those sweater puppies)

Karma so far: I got a significant raise during the 6 months as a single, lost 10 pounds, hooked up with more chicks in those 6 months than during my whole life before. I'm finally travelling to the US in November, something that I have wanted to do my whole life, but was always "too expensive for her". I rekindled old friendships with people she didn't approve of. She on the other hand will go to her grave knowing she betrayed the trust of one of the few persons who have truly cared about her in her lifetime.

2 songs I have listened over and over again during the tough moments: Bitches ain't shit but hoes 'n tricks and 99 Problems. Good times! Even if it doesn't seem like it, time heals all wounds. Hang in there guys!

febrezemuch · 2013-10-09T02:35:14+00:00

i am so thankful for you. thank you so much.

peetss · 2013-10-09T02:56:58+00:00

Seriously, just listen to Superman by Eminem.

abdrone · 2013-10-09T04:17:29+00:00

I can't tell you how much I needed to hear these words and read these articles. I was just about to post a thread about it (and I never post threads here) but I was just utterly crushed a few hours ago and didn't know what to do.

Thanks brother.

gregormcgregor · 2013-10-09T06:27:43+00:00

Just got dumped out of the blue yesterday after a great relationship that lasted 9 months to the day. She wasn't ready for a stable and serious relationship I guess...

This article is just what I needed.

I know things will get better, but it just sucks right now - It always leaves a big gaping hole when someoon you care about, maybe even made plans for the future exits your life. All those hopes and planing for nothing - alas all I can do now is cut my loses, cherish the good times and aim for better.

Still I know the next few days will be a bitch.

Golden_arm · 2013-10-09T23:27:20+00:00

seriously good timing for me, thanks for this.

I_miss_the_rain · 2013-10-09T03:20:26+00:00

great post

Gingerbrehd · 2013-10-09T05:10:42+00:00

I'm going through a rough break-up too. Thanks, man. Hang in there, my friend.

MrStinky · 2013-10-09T09:27:05+00:00

You can add this link as well:

The No Contact Challenge! - Read this if you just got dumped

purecoconut · 2013-10-09T12:56:56+00:00

It's been about two months and I still find myself trapped in thought and hung up on my ex.

I think it can be because I haven't had a proper rebound. The minute things ended, she was with another guy, and that hurt my ego. big time. I think problem is I keep thinking about the good times and It is easy to forget all the reasons why I wasn't happy with her. But I think the biggest reason for being so caught up is I still find myself daydreaming about the idea of her.

SemanticsLogistics · 2013-10-09T20:42:15+00:00

Yo NYC, you've been around here quite a while and you contribute some great stuff so I know you have what it takes to keep on and you'll be just fine.

That said, I know it sucks right now and that's what this post is about. I don't have any articles to add for ya but I have a little advice to add that I haven't seen mentioned in the comments: do stuff! Go outside, go for a run or a walk, go somewhere you've never been and strike up a conversation with strangers, build something, climb something, eat somewhere. Doing these types of things have two benefits: 1. They take your mind off things in the near term and 2. They help you develop a sense of yourself again as an individual, not as part of your relationship. After enough good experiences have passed since your last relationship, you'll have a well of stuff to look back on and say "yeah, life is still going pretty good" if you find yourself missing your relationship again.

As you know, getting over it will take time, but in the meantime, get out there and do what you can to move things along!

hulk181 · 2013-10-09T11:20:47+00:00

nobody2000 · 2013-10-09T12:15:46+00:00

Since this is probably why 80-90% of people find this sub, this post should be on the sidebar.

ESPECIALLY since I had to buy into all the shitty "Get the girl back" PUA bullshit a few weeks after my breakup last year. Hours of Youtube videos gone by and my inner game was no better than it was weeks earlier. I knew about this sub, but felt I wasn't ready - I was always ready.

A fucking Mark Manson article though? That girl could be having bukkake parties and you wouldn't give a shit after reading that. I like it!

dullknife45 · 2013-10-09T05:48:10+00:00

The breakup survival video by rsdtyler helped me a lot too, it's great and makes so much sense on a higher level. Awesome post!

grantmoore3d · 2013-10-09T07:13:49+00:00

I've read the "Fuck Yes or No" article before, glad you posted it. Simple phrase with a lot of power.

TheBastionNarrator · 2013-10-09T08:12:49+00:00

here

DaSneakiKawiki · 2013-10-09T08:42:26+00:00

It's been over a year since breaking up with my girl and even though it's been so long, I needed this. Thank you so much man!

Kuaile · 2013-10-09T10:28:35+00:00

I always refer people to Braddock's classic article: "FUCK ONEITIS"

http://www.theattractionforums.com/general-discussion/53970-oneitus-time-take-back-control-you.html?referrerid=48835

2013-10-09T12:37:44+00:00

Thanks a lot.

MrJoeBlow · 2013-10-09T14:26:21+00:00

I needed this so much. Thanks man

grinny588 · 2013-10-09T14:31:38+00:00

The "fuck yes or no" article was great. Brutally honest. It's forcing me to be brutally honest with myself, but that's the only way to achieve happiness I feel

voc30 · 2013-10-09T14:51:28+00:00

I dont know what kind of music you listen to, but if seemed like the band Bayside mirrored all of my feels that I was having when I broke up with my last LTR. Sometimes it helps to know that you're not the only one who is feeling a certain way.

Self talk. Tell yourself how awsome you are until you believe it, bring that confidence back up.

corejava2 · 2013-10-09T15:14:41+00:00

Thx for this, it is really helpful

EpicStumblin · 2013-10-09T15:27:42+00:00

This should be side barred for references recent post break ups, if not already

mohammadhasan · 2013-10-09T16:30:04+00:00

Best!

malvad0 · 2013-10-09T18:10:48+00:00

like julien says, you can recreate it. It's just a moment of scarcity that will pass and you'll move on and be more badass thus attract a chick that better suits who you are.

theonlyxaso · 2013-10-09T18:44:08+00:00

Great articles! cant wait to read some more later. I caught my girl sending nudes to her ex, this girl lived with me for three months and we experienced a lot together, shes with the ex now and it really sucks, but im going to a concert tonight and a party before and i know shes gonna be there but im not going to speak to her unless i have to and im going to mack it with chicks in front of her so she can dwell about losing me

silvad702 · 2013-10-09T19:27:57+00:00

Beta...

weedmylips1 · 2013-10-09T20:04:59+00:00

When i broke up this video helped me http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uTAxZPOtGKk

Greasy_Joe_Bick · 2013-10-09T21:16:03+00:00

Nice.

ScaryFatMan · 2013-10-09T21:40:20+00:00

Thank you. I've been trying to move on from her for the last few weeks nd these articles are one of the few things that are helping. I know im just another internet face, but I genuinely appreciate this post. Thank you so much.

mrsilvers · 2013-10-09T22:44:10+00:00

Man, it's been 3 months since I broke up with my ex and there are some things said here that I need to adjust. Thanks so much for this.

King_Kamehameha · 2013-10-10T00:32:13+00:00

Thanks for this! Very good post

Radioactive24 · 2013-10-10T17:06:48+00:00

So, I'm in the middle of breaking up at the moment (more so it's happening right now, and I'm officially finalizing it with her when I get home from work).

Any advice for when you two share the same friend group?

scenny · 2013-10-12T15:54:07+00:00

A little late but I don't think anyone posted this: http://www.futuristicwords.com/2010/12/kill-beatrice/

nycprowl · 2013-11-12T20:37:48+00:00

Hey. I know someone will probably not read this. Maybe op will. But I just need to vent. My now ex-gf of 2 years dumped me last night. On her birthday. It was for a really dumb reason too. Apparently she saw me dancing with another person at a music festival we went to. I never touched another girl besides her there. My best friend and his gf are two people who vouched for me and told her that I didn't do anything. But "she saw what she saw" complete bullshit.

It hurts. I gave this girl my everything. She was my first love and the first girl I ever slept with. We even had worse fights before, but i guess she just had enough.

I don't know what to do at this point. She's a great girl and I hate that all this happened and I lost her for something I didn't even do. It's just not fair, you know?

I keep trying to not talk to her. But it's extremely difficult. What's even worse is that we have the same school schedule AND we work in the same place. Everywhere I go I'm going to see her and it'll hurt so much. I'm even contemplating right now wether to get a new job.

Idk what to do. I'm so hurt. And I want nothing but to get her back at this point. My friends say to give her sometime and eventually she'll realize what she lost and come back. But I don't want to wait. I'm impatient and I need to know what's going to happen next between me and her.

Yeah. That's about it.

throwawaybitchs · 2013-12-14T17:38:01+00:00

This is also great: http://www.blackdragon-blog.com/2012/03/11/nine-steps-to-avoid-neediness-and-oneitis/

psycho-logical · 2013-10-09T07:27:06+00:00

Gotye's "Somebody That I Used To Know." randomly came up on my playlist when I started the first article haha.

Take the good from the relationship and move on. She can't take your positive memories unless you poison them. Distractions are paramount. Hobbies, working out, hanging with friends etc... All great.

pluribusnutos · 2013-10-09T10:13:02+00:00

Those Julien videos are fucking god awful.

Lanzal · 2013-10-09T13:37:26+00:00

Very good post.

spartan1337 · 2013-10-09T05:35:08+00:00

This is relevant to my interests, broke up with gf after 8 years, pretty sure she was cheating, oh well, time to get back on the whores.

Title	I just got dumped a few weeks ago. Here are the resources that have been helping me get through the breakup. Good for people with oneitis.
Author	nycprowl
Upvotes	437
Comments	102
Date	October 9, 2013 1:06 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1o114r/i_just_got_dumped_a_few_weeks_ago_here_are_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-just-got-dumped-a-few-weeks-ago-here-are-the.1359672 https://theredarchive.com/post/1359672

Comments

1 piece of advice in this thread: DO NOT CONTACT HER.