Is it normal to approach women at shopping malls, stores and the street?

DaygameCode · 2024-09-08T11:00:01+00:00

-Is it normal/weird?

In the sense of conforming to common behaviors, traits, or circumstances shared by the majority?

The answer is no. Just as being gay or trans isn’t the most typical experience, since only a minority of people identify as such.

Should you be doing things that are normal?

Whether or not you should be doing things that are considered “normal” depends on your personal values and goals.

Following norms can provide a sense of belonging and stability, but it doesn’t necessarily lead to fulfillment or authenticity.

Sometimes, the most meaningful paths are those that deviate from the norm or “normality”. So you need to do what feels right for you, rather than simply conforming for the sake of fitting in.

So while cold-approaching may not be the most mainstream thing to do, that doesn’t mean you should follow the sheep and conform to their expectations, but if fitting in with the majority of people is more important than following your path then no one’s gonna stop you.

You are always free to go to nightclubs filled with drunk people and loud noise that makes it impossible to connect with someone and endlessly scrolling through tinder profiles that just value superficiality, since, after all, that’s considered “normal”.

Is it forced?

Depends on your social skills. Some people don’t know how to do it and they come across as forced. Other people know how to do it because they have social skills and can be very smooth when doing it.

So the action itself of cold-approaching is neither forced nor smooth, it depends on the person doing it.

BXtherapist · 2024-09-08T10:45:13+00:00

Just keep it RESPECTFUL and INNOCENT

LizzoBathwater · 2024-09-08T10:04:25+00:00

I’ve done it at a museum, but i started with totally non-sexual normal human being conversation about the surroundings. Got a date from it.

MSHUser · 2024-09-08T15:21:10+00:00

I cold approach regularly and have a lot of experience with it.

The pickup gurus who give you this advice are mostly gonna tell you to run sets at a mall for hours on end, trying to increase your number count. So like if you approach 1000 girls, you get maybe 15 numbers, and 3-5 of them turn to dates. That's usually the math. The problem here is you're spending a lot of hours with a high rejection rate. For some dudes, this is okay, for me personally I wanna maximize my enjoyment of my own life, rather than putting a couple hours just to get numbers that may not go anywhere.

I think it's better to take a more integrated strategy. You can approach a woman anywhere, but it becomes more natural if you're doing it while you're doing your own thing. We can use the mall as an example. Say you have some shopping to do or you just wanna grab a snack, and you just so happen to see someone you find attractive. At that point, I think it's okay to go talk to them as you're likely to be your authentic self in that moment.

Don't get me wrong. This is not me saying you need an excuse to go to the mall so you can meet women. Meeting women should be a byproduct of the lifestyle you live, and that's exactly how you should set it up.

Ryan_the_Scion · 2024-09-08T15:34:44+00:00

Is it normal to approach women at shopping malls, stores and the street?

It's not something the average guy does and part of me feels like doing this is weird and forced.

If you want the most natural flow, then move as a natural day. Head to the mall, visit a cafe, talk to people, move on to the street, have some errands there, then go to the park. So that you're moving. Having nice experiences and talking with girls all the while.

Casanova-Quinn · 2024-09-08T15:39:05+00:00

Normal as in common? No, most guys don't do it. It is appropriate to do? Yes, as long as you act chill and polite.

drillyapussy · 2024-09-08T09:32:12+00:00

Most of those pickup gurus are incredibly awkward. I’m sure you’ve seen men randomly approach ladies and are both having a positive interaction, it almost seems as if they know each other but really they probably don’t

7asas · 2024-09-08T11:25:22+00:00

Just do what you wanna do. Who gives a shit..? If you want to talk to a girl, go for it.

connor42 · 2024-09-08T10:57:33+00:00

Not in the UK

Not to say it’s impossible but it’s definitely not something people normally do

nibitcoin · 2024-09-08T17:48:37+00:00

Yes it is

premonial · 2024-09-08T18:27:48+00:00

It's completely normal.

feels like doing this is weird and forced

If you make it weird and forced, it will be. Your goal in the approach is to make the girl comfortable, laugh, see how awesome person you are - literally opposite of weird and/or forced.

Working_Potential_26 · 2024-09-08T19:00:32+00:00

When I was 19 I went to the mall after doing some shrooms .. I had just got my first real estate check .. 6k in my bank…

I went to spoil myself and had the biggest smile on my face.. felt so confident .. some girl working at the booths selling products called me over .. I acted like I was interested in the product and told her to use it on me .. at the same time I was making her smile and giggle… she was 27 .. i said i was 23. I asked for her IG she happily gave it to me

A week later I took her to go eat and she paid for my burrito and hers lol .

I drove to my spot, rolled up a blunt and I asked her do you wanna fuck first or eat first ?

We ate first then I spread them cheeks ..

kobegoat222444 · 2024-09-08T19:43:47+00:00

Yes it’s normal

Western-Month-3877 · 2024-09-08T12:53:06+00:00

It’s normal if you make it look normal. Even if you just smile at a woman you could come across as creepy. But smiling is a normal thing.

I remember when I approached a gorgeous woman while I went shopping with my sister and her kid. She asked me “who was the woman talking to you earlier? You never introduced her to me!”

I told her that I just met her 15 minutes ago. She was like “wait what? But you guys talked like you’ve known each other for a long time.” I just smiled at her and said “yeah I know. That’s my super power.”

rando755 · 2024-09-08T17:23:37+00:00

It's probably less common than it was a few decades ago. The pickup artist community had its peak in the late 1990s or early 2000s. That is why many pickup artists currently use dating apps.

Classic_Writer8573 · 2024-09-08T20:03:22+00:00

I wouldn't walk up and act like it's a pick up, but maybe just casually converse, be interesting and ask for her number at the end like it's not something you usually do, but is spontaneous.

WolfOfUmea · 2024-09-08T21:39:28+00:00

Its normal but its hard as hell. Personally only worked once.

sedille · 2024-09-08T22:18:52+00:00

sure, a relax smile, nonchalant… if you recive positive feedback (another smile) start the talking, maybe with a light compliment (I like your blouse, style, smile, energy, class…)

okyeahmhm · 2024-09-08T23:10:44+00:00

I was approached today while pumping air in my tire… The guy came up and adjusted the PSI setting without me asking though, which made me want to shoo him away. Don’t be that guy and take it one step too far. A simple, “Hello,” would have been much more welcome.

JayinHK · 2024-09-09T06:22:16+00:00

I've genuinely asked for directions a few times, and girls thought I was trying to talk to em (I had 0 interest in those girls). So yes, it's normal in a big city for sure

No-Preference8767 · 2024-09-10T01:04:04+00:00

Normal as in the average guy has done the action but The frequency at which you will do it probably makes it abnormal.

As long as you're rotating out your stores , shopping malls and streets, you should be more or less unnoticable

aeroaca9 · 2024-09-10T03:01:36+00:00

No, unless you’re actually attractive you’ll come off creepy.

Lublake · 2024-09-10T19:41:01+00:00

Is starting a business and cold calling prospects to sell them your service normal? Can it be awkward? I would argue yes it can be. It’s easier to sit on your couch and do nothing. Would the world be in the place it is without sales people? Sales people are one of the highest compensated professions in the United States, because they make business happen

Same with talking to women. Most men are not cut out for it, you will get rejected and it will be awkward

So yes it is something that is not normal. The typical man is not able to do it, but there are a few people who have the motivation to do it. If they do, they deal with added stress, etc. but if you do it long enough you will see unique results in your dating life. People hate sales people. People on Reddit also hate guys who go out and approach. It will always be that way

Makakka2002 · 2024-09-10T19:58:05+00:00

I don’t fucking care and do what’s most comfortable for me = gym malls and shops where I’m king

MrPound4Pound · 2024-09-10T23:47:17+00:00

I've done it so much it's normal to me now 🤷

CandidInevitable757 · 2024-09-11T03:02:23+00:00

No it isn’t normal and you’re right most guys aren’t doing it. But if you want to get more action than the normal guy (or you do right now) you’ll have to do something different.

Sherman140824 · 2024-09-11T07:03:50+00:00

In my city we get a lot of tourists and it is considered normal for young guys to go talk to them in groups of 2-3. The girls always stay and chat for a while, but don't always give them their instas. I have never seen someone over 30 approach women on the street.

miyass_miyass · 2024-09-08T12:41:13+00:00

Whether or not it’s normal is a totally different question to whether it’s effective or worth doing.

Remandergrowth · 2024-09-08T12:46:32+00:00

There are a few factors that exist when it comes to finding good spots to pick up women.

Duration. How often do women typically stay in said location? For shopping malls stores and the street, no one really wants to spend a long time, so you will not really get the opportunity to build rapport and attraction. Remember, the longer you talk to a girl, the more likely she will remember you, sleep with you, etc.
Fear factor. Do women feel safe in said location? For example, in bars, women often feel safer being approached because of the crowd of people, the bartender, and the bouncer. If you approach a girl at 1 in the morning in a dark alley, there is no way you will have a chance.
Compatibility. Does the location help you have the conversation? Clubs suck because with loud music and a lot of effects. The streets suck because they don't give you much to talk about to form a connection. Parks are much better for pick up.

Ultimately, malls and stores suck for picking people up based on these criteria. People don't spend a lot of time there, and the mall doesn't help you have the discussion.

Parks, Cafes, book stores, and activities are all better.

epimpstyle · 2024-09-08T14:23:29+00:00

No is not normal, but it doesn't matter, if you think too much you will just create a new excuse not to approach women because it's not nice to approach them in a shopping centre, or it's not nice to stop them, there are people around you, maybe she's in a hurry... and so on.

You should approach them whenever you find an opportunity without censoring yourself, look at this VIDEO, here I started a conversation with a girl during the air explosions in Ukraine, so it doesn't matter, if you found an opportunity, use it, try to be social because if you only find excuses, you will only get better at finding excuses, not better at approaching.

salutcemoi · 2024-09-08T15:11:48+00:00

Glacier_Sama · 2024-09-08T15:23:23+00:00

Yes normal. Been doing this for 20 years

Title	Is it normal to approach women at shopping malls, stores and the street?
Author	walkinfatih
Upvotes	26
Comments	46
Date	September 8, 2024 9:21 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1fbtrje/is_it_normal_to_approach_women_at_shopping_malls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/is-it-normal-to-approach-women-at-shopping-malls.1529786 https://theredarchive.com/post/1529786

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