Together 17 years, married for 14. Me(41m) was blindsided when my STBX (41F) told me she was going home for the summer vacation, and told me “I’m not saying we will be together when I get back”. Almost no communication all summer. We are both teachers, and have July and August off.

The night she comes back, she tells me she is done, and she wants a divorce. I grey rock her and don’t give her the angry reaction she was looking for. She insists she won’t sell the house we own, as she doesn’t want to move twice in a year. She is planning on moving provinces next summer. She also expected me to live in the house to “save money” for the next 10 months.

I find a place to move to, and tell her I am moving out at the end of September. She goes out and starts dating within days of demanding the final separation, and when I don’t react, she brings a random guy home and sleeps with him while I am in the spare bedroom down the hall. I hear everything.

Next morning, she throws it in my face that she needs to get out there and start dating again. She denies sleeping around while home in the summer, but said if she did it wouldn’t matter as we were separated. I call my new landlord and move out the next weekend.

So esteemed Redditors, where do I go from here? What books, podcasts, accounts, etc helped you move on? Cause it’s shitty cooking for one, and having no friends cause she was so possessive that I couldn’t have outside hobbies.

It really shitty starting over at 41…