A little vent about women's behavior

HistorianOk2573 · 2025-07-15T20:32:39+00:00

- How to loosen things up with strangers without lowering your ego

I don't think that's the right term here. Your ego is not your friend or ally, specially in dynamics with women you are trying to seduce.

I think what you mean is "How to make the conversation less tense, more spontaneous, relaxed and fun with random women without acting insecure, submissive or approval-seeking", which is not the same thing as ego.

For that you need to understand that what you seek is connection. Which is a state where two (or more) people happen to understand each other with empathy and without judgment, and whose personalities click so well the interaction feels effortless, joyful, positive, and generally fun and engaging.

Women connect by sharing how you feel about thing, so just use the formula:

What, why and how it feels.

- What is basically explaining what happened what u like, or what u do.

- Why is the reason for doing what u do, liking what u like, said what u said, or felt what u felt... etc.

- How it feels is basically describing with detail how that made u feel, using metaphors, or allegories, or expressing the way ur body felt inside while u were experiencing the thing u are talking about, or making them feel like u get where they are coming from by putting yourself in their shoes (aka showing empathy).

So it's about this, about talking about how things feel for you immediately. Maybe talk about the feeling you get when you meet someone for the first time in an event where you don't know everyone. The idea is to share experiences that they can also relate because they've live them too. And when you talk about that, it makes them feel relaxed and understood.

- But what if their guard is high u ask?

Let’s say u see a group of girls sitting talking with each other, u approach them sit down and say “hey guys you look cute, what’s your names?” and their reaction is bad telling you: “None of your business, get lost”

Sure, you could argue they are unfriendly bitches, and that other girls might be more friendly (which is true) and that you skipped a bullet, but there is actually a good reason why they reacted badly, which is because the way you did that approach was intrusive and presumptuous.

Immediately asking for their names without first gauging their interest in a conversation is presumptuous because it assumes they wanted to engage with an stranger, even though they had not indicated or given you permission to do it first.

You can again obviously keep doing the other approaches that got you a bad reaction, but if you are a beginner who have some anxieties and your goal is to just approach in a way that avoids those negative reactions, the best way is to do it the following way.

So this is a guide for begginers only on how to approach them to reduce risk as much as possible and still getting you started practicing.

You should seek permission to engage with them in a conversation and reasuure them that u will go soon to lower their guard, for example:

“Hey, I don’t mean to interrupt your conversation, so I’ll be quick cuz i have to go soon anyway. The thing is i saw your friend here and i thought “oh man, she is just my type, and i thought i would regret it if i didn’t at least try to get to know who she is as a person, you feel me?”

Doing it this way can lower their guard, because they don't have to guess why you are talking to them and they know that you will go soon meaning that they don't have to worry about getting rid of you for now, since you said you were leaving soon. This makes them relax for a while.

DiligentRope · 2025-07-15T20:18:19+00:00

work on your body language to reduce their anxiety, give them distance and direct your body slightly away when talking to them. Look into hot and cold techniques

ThatDarnSmell · 2025-07-15T20:32:38+00:00

Don't stand too closely or be aggressive. Give them some space. How do you normally feel when a stranger randomly approaches you? You're probably assuming they are selling you something or asking for money. Women have to also deal with those things along with a bunch of annoying guys cat-calling them or trying to hit on them.

personal_cheezits · 2025-07-15T20:13:06+00:00

A couple of women being defensive is expected, but when it’s all of them the problem is you.

It’s possible you’re coming off in a way that is sending up red flags (too cocky, too pushy, too creepy, etc). You need to take a step back and evaluate the image you’re giving off and how to fix it.

CoachSlyDating · 2025-07-15T21:55:58+00:00

They act like you are trying to steal from them because you literally are stealing off their good energy. If you are giving good vibes to the girl, they generally will reciprocate and give you good energy back. You can loosen up by loosening up your body language and doing some verbal warm up drills to get you talking. Tell stories in the mirror or on camera.

minorkeyed · 2025-07-15T21:35:09+00:00

Because they lack the social skills to stay safe without being closed off.

FriendlyWrenChilling · 2025-07-16T07:19:09+00:00

Its most likely that they can sense you have a secret agenda. See my post "why nice guys lose out"

Exotic_Pop_765 · 2025-07-16T12:40:35+00:00

probably you need something from them thats why. aka you re in "value taking mode" trying to join THEIR fun. you should go more with a "check this out" vibe or "value giving" as they call it. please dont ask me "how do i do this". you need to break down why ARE NOT this. and then BECOME it.

ShadowBladeOfDeathFl · 2025-07-17T04:01:22+00:00

lol it just means you're coming off awkward af. just go out there and talk to more women you'll get better at making them feel comfortable. some people are always going to be uncomfortable no matter what you do tho.

MineDesperate2920 · 2025-07-19T07:12:17+00:00

Try to have a super calm vibe. But yea I get it. Some girls can just be straight up mean

Rhino3750ss · 2025-07-15T21:01:47+00:00

All women will act like you are doing something wrong because of mental processing time. The processing time differs depending on interest level. A high interest women will still look at you condescendingly or be highly defensive for a couple seconds before snapping out of it, an uninterested woman won't snap out of it at all.

connor42 · 2025-07-15T21:10:44+00:00

Where do you live?

Like people say the UK is hard as - except pubs and clubs - if you try and start a causal conversation with a stranger people will immediately look at you with suspicion and the tone will be stand-offish (mine certainly is)

Or worse places like the Middle East where you’re liable to get lynched if you start approaching random women

New_Banana3858 · 2025-07-15T23:02:31+00:00

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4n2OMnrIYE

just mimic what this guy does.

Title	A little vent about women's behavior
Author	J1mmy_white
Upvotes	1
Comments	36
Date	July 15, 2025 8:07 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1m0saip/a_little_vent_about_womens_behavior/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/a-little-vent-about-womens-behavior.1557241 https://theredarchive.com/post/1557241

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