How big of a factor is education in compatibility? Is it a factor at all?

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2019-03-20T18:52:44+00:00

level of education is now a proxy for connections your offspring will have

LinkedFerret69 · 2019-03-20T19:56:01+00:00

Intelligence is something women look for, and degrees are an easy way to easily tell if they are educated. I don't think that women will look for men with the same level of education as much as looking to see if he is smart. Plus after a certain point anyone will realize that the more qualifications you look for the more narrow the field becomes.

md8716 · 2019-03-20T20:14:57+00:00

Education signals class. It's a tool for lazy people who want to filter out the working class.

IMO, upper class people are pleasant enough to be around, but fragile as hell. Take them out of their safe, wealthy bubble, and they kinda fall apart.

NiceGuyNumber4 · 2019-03-20T18:42:22+00:00

Women want their man to have at least what they have, but more is more. Applies to education, income, height, etc.

doctor_trucks · 2019-03-20T19:52:25+00:00

Education is not important to me, but intelligence and curiosity are.

I have found in my experience that being a highly educated woman is actually a handicap in the dating scene.

passepar2t · 2019-03-20T19:20:02+00:00

Having at least her level of education seems to be one prerequisite to a long term relationship in most cases.

rus9384 · 2019-03-20T19:22:04+00:00

I'd say status > education, but a degree is a component of status.

GridReXX · 2019-03-20T23:14:24+00:00

For me on a visceral lizard brain level it’s less education and more when we interact do you come off demonstrably less intelligent than me? This is relative to the woman’s own various forms of intelligence. If you come off way less here, I’m very much grossly turned off. And no this doesn’t mean if a woman is a lawyer she expects a man to know esoteric legalese. It’s a more general sense. Most guys in my social circle for example I don’t get that from but sometimes I interact with a guy and my inner monologue is “oh sweet summer child bless his heart he’s dumb dumb.” Lol if I’m thinking that you’re climbing an uphill battle to get me to “admire” you and admiration is a key part of visceral attraction for me :/
For me on a calculative lifestyle and social circle compatibility level, I may take actual level of education into consideration. But I can overlook this if he meets other things I value and as long as he’s not “dumb dumb” (:

[deleted] · 2019-03-21T00:03:37+00:00

Certain women are very by the book, love rules and structure, and for that reason they pursue higher education. They're more likely to think about settling down later, most likely have been told their whole life because of their grades they are intelligent and will seek a man on their same level.

Other women, like me, see degrees as almost worthless unless you're gonna become a doctor or engineer or w/e. I'd be happy with a guy that does real estate, owns his own company, does a trade as long as he makes good money. Education is one of the ways to gain status and money, but it's not the only way. Status/money > education.

Willow-girl · 2019-03-21T06:48:58+00:00

I'm a working-class girl so I don't GAF about credentials but a dude has to be bright and well-read. Eccentric geniuses moisten my panties, har!

larrythetomato · 2019-03-21T07:17:17+00:00

Education is a proxy for a bunch of different traits that definitely effect compatibility, including: Social Status, Intelligence, the big5 traits openness and contentiousness. All of these traits will cause problems if there is too much difference between the two of you.

So the question is similar in asking "How important is green in photosynthesis." It doesn't matter much, however chlorophyll is green, and chlorophyll is important in photosynthesis.

[deleted] · 2019-03-21T14:24:18+00:00

All I can respond is based on personal experience and general trends I have witnessed.

Middle-class "striver" men are more than willing (as they always have been) to "marry up" to someone with higher education/social status
I have witnessed several "alpha females"--med/lawschool, 6 figure income, "power women"-type, pair up with working class Joes, only to cheat on them or complain incessantly about how they are "lazy" only "focused on their hobbies" and "lacking in ambition"--These are usually hipster men with beards who are in shape, but just work a job and then go home and smoke weed/drink/play video games and spend their spare time in the garage.
Education per se is not necessarily the equivalent of intelligence. I dated plenty of college graduated women who were dumb as a box of rocks and couldn't converse about the most basic topics in history, philosophy, music...etc. If you can't hold a conversation with someone, it does not bode well for the relationship.
The problem with highly educated women is that they assume that the same traits they find attractive in a man are the same traits a man finds attractive in a woman.
I have said this several times before, but a successful man who is interested in marriage and a family really doesn't care how many initials are after your name or how much money you bring in. He is looking for a nice (as in not a bitch with an attitude), decent-looking girl, who has her head on her shoulders, ins't a spendthrift and who is kind, caring, trustworthy and loyal. He wants a mom for his kids, not a business partner. Highly educated women think their degrees make them more attractive to such men and they do not. In fact, quite the opposite. Most "power women" trying to climb the corporate ladder drink like fish, do not take care of their bodies, and are concerned first and foremost about getting ahead---even if that means giving head to their boss.

Barely-moral · 2019-03-20T18:52:23+00:00

In my experience women seem to care about it. They tend to date up.

Men seem to be more open to date down when it comes to education.

I don't see why should I care about my partner's education. If she is curious then she will listen, she willl learn and she will be a pleasant company.

A degreee tells me nothing about how good of a partner she is.

reluctantly_red · 2019-03-20T19:20:18+00:00

Education is super important to me. If a woman is not educated she's just not LTR/marriage material. Absolute minimum requirement is a four year degree from a good school.

diffdedbed · 2019-03-20T20:14:48+00:00

I have three advanced degrees.

That would make my dating pool of women like .001% of the population at a guess.

Added women who get three advanced degrees who I'd consider fuckable would be something like .00001%

And thats before getting the ones who would want me into account.

My wife has a BA degree.

But she also has a 145 IQ. (Which puts her in .01% of the population but eh)

Education is over rated, but basic intelligence is not.

Littleknownfacts · 2019-03-20T18:40:36+00:00

Hey OP, I've just approved your post, can you make a small edit to the body of your post to summon the automod, thanks.

ThisIsJustATr1bute · 2019-03-20T18:43:32+00:00

There are class differences. An old school prep UMC/UC man will require a woman who at least has a Bachelor’s and got the liberal arts education as is tradition. It isn’t required, but it’s the done thing. Blue collar couples may not have that same pressure. But these days people are bucking trends. Still, the female desire for a man to look up to in some way often means she won’t take someone with less education than her.

Be all this as it may it is still true that men are much less bothered if the woman they’re pursuing is less educated than him and/or has a career path that does’t have a trajectory.

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shoup88 · 2019-03-20T22:05:32+00:00

I think that with online dating, it’s easy to imagine everything you want on paper and then filter out people who don’t meet that standard, when in reality you could easily be compatible with someone who isn’t as educated, is an inch or two shorter than your ideal, or dresses poorly.

Having similar levels of education often means you run in the same social circles, and the difference between someone with a GED and someone with a PHD might be too much, I don’t think there’s any meaningful difference between like a masters or a bachelors for most people.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2019-03-21T07:11:07+00:00

It is THE factor. Education levels also generally correlate with similarities socioeconomic level, lifestyle, political views, etc etc etc. Educated people have more in common with other educated people than with other non-educated people.

The effects are being seen today, with a fraction of the female population, highly educated and career-driven not being able to find a suitable partner. Maybe that will change in the next generation?

SeemedGood · 2019-03-21T08:08:10+00:00

I grew up in a house in which education was of paramount importance and my parents provided my siblings and I with the best educations available in the US.

I used to believe that I would be unhappy with a partner without at least a degree from a high quality 4 year college, but as I have matured and lived in a variety of communities outside of the East Coast “Establishment “ corridor in which I was raised I have come to understand that one’s level of education isn’t particularly well correlated to one’s curiosity, thoughtfulness, wisdom, or willingness to work hard. Further, I have come to believe that our current higher educational system doesn’t offer one much more than a ludicrously expensive progressive brainwashing that is unlikely to produce the same lifetime returns in the future as it has in past decades.

YetAnotherCommenter · 2019-03-21T10:17:52+00:00

For smart people, education is more likely to matter.

For women, they are more likely to insist on a high level of education in their partners than men, but this isn't necessarily about compatibility so much as it is about wanting a man with high earning potential.

Men are expected to be the breadwinners and most men internalize the expectation, so they are much more willing to accept women of lower educational attainment unless the man himself is significantly above-average intellect.

[deleted] · 2019-03-21T13:03:18+00:00

This is obviously a personal question that will differ by individual preferences. I honestly couldn't care less at all about education level. I care about intelligence and personality though.

I think the people who do care see it as a proxy for social status. Which is just not something I personally care about within reason. As in I don't care about being UMC or whatever. Most of my friends are working class even though I come from a more middle class background myself (kind of).

[deleted] · 2019-03-21T18:51:13+00:00

Hobbies > Job. That's all I have to say about it.

DXBrigade · 2019-03-22T10:29:56+00:00

Highly educated women are snob. It's about social class. The plumber might make more money than the lawyer but the latter will Always be more respected socially.

That said, as a college educated woman, I noticed I have more in common with educated people. They tend to be more cultured and progressive.

TheseNthose · 2019-03-20T18:45:48+00:00

Education as in getting in debt for a piece of paper that reads that you're not a retard?

Or actually being knowledgeable and intelligent?

darudeboysandstorm · 2019-03-20T21:54:10+00:00

It's a piece of paper, it is just as important as you make it out to be. some will some wont.

blackedoutfast · 2019-03-20T19:39:23+00:00

I don't think education is the real issue for those women. they may say it's about education, but they're really just using that as a proxy for career/income.

most of these women with graduate degrees have decent professional jobs like lawyer, doctor, etc that pay a pretty good salary. and since we know that all females are naturally hypergamous, this means that these well-paid women want a guy who makes at least as much money as themselves, and hopefully more. and the majority of those guys are going to have one of those professional jobs like doctor or lawyer that will require a graduate degree.

i doubt any chick with a JD making $150k as a lawyer is going to turn down some dude who only has a bachelor's degree, but is making millions for whatever reason. but those guys are rare, much rarer than CareerWomens with graduate degrees.

Title	How big of a factor is education in compatibility? Is it a factor at all?
Author	oscillodope
Upvotes	4
Comments	163
Date	March 20, 2019 6:21 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/b3fgav/how_big_of_a_factor_is_education_in_compatibility/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-big-of-a-factor-is-education-in-compatibility.256680 https://theredarchive.com/post/256680

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