Hey old geezers, how has the dating landscape changed since online dating/social media got big?

Salty-Bastard · 2019-02-11T22:20:41+00:00

It was harder to pick up girls in This as opposed to This.

mgtow_1 · 2019-02-12T09:32:23+00:00

A lot more people are fat. Making harder to find someone you are physically attracted to.

LeJacquelope · 2019-02-11T22:24:32+00:00

Late 40s here. Dating has become a hypergamic wasteland. If I was single I would lean toward MGTOW at this point.

officerkondo · 2019-02-11T22:35:44+00:00

I'm in my mid-40s and left college just before hook-up culture started.

Social media has allowed even average women to receive the attention that even in the 1990s was reserved for runway models and Hollywood actresses. Swipe-based dating apps have given women a combination of abundance mentality and FOMO - fifty matches within an hour of making a profile and an even better guy is just one swipe away.

The end result is ego inflation for many women that gives them overweeningly high standards that price themselves out of the dating market. When I was in my early 20s, you saw a girl you liked, you approached her and it was, "this is your one shot at this limited time offer". And it was just you in front of her - there wasn't a line of 20 other guys next to you waiting to make their pitch. It was quite easier to get a first date because of the perceived lack of options. Now, the hypergamy is unbridled and the majority of sex clusters around the top 20% of men.

couldbemage · 2019-02-12T00:13:47+00:00

The only real change to me is that I get to know way more about girls before we even get to a first date. Like watching a bunch of vlogs she made in high school and college. Weird. My youth is just memories and a handful of pictures.

I still meet most partners IRL. And everyone I've met online has been near my age.

colcrnch · 2019-02-12T11:28:09+00:00

Actually it’s great for introverts. I hate clubs and bars and other social settings. Tinder revolutionized the way people like me meet others. It’s often the case that you don’t even have to take someone out anymore. They’ll just come over. Good stuff.

trynafigureitout22 · 2019-02-12T14:33:37+00:00

https://imgur.com/a/jHeyivw
It means as a 6'4", 24 yo black dude with his shit mostly together, these are the types of women who typically swipe right on me :(

diffdedbed · 2019-02-11T22:22:03+00:00

Mmmmm I can only get hypothetical based on what I've seen, being I'm an old geezer (for reddit) use online dating, but only looking for swingers which is a completely different demographic.

My guess based on what I've seen is that for older men who are well off and stayed in shape, online dating is a good way to get in contact with younger women that in your day to day you wouldn't meet.

It would also be a lot easier to find a woman my age if I wanted to for that matter.

My guess is that the losers in online dating are the older women.

passepar2t · 2019-02-12T12:54:14+00:00

I'm not an old fart but when I was in my 20s, it was easier to charm women with war stories and an adventurer persona.

LCOSPARELT1 · 2019-02-12T17:36:57+00:00

The biggest difference is the decreased amount of trust between men and women and the increased amount of cynicism. When the average person met someone prior to 2000, they thought “this is exciting and I’m hopeful this will last”. There were no guarantees, of course, but optimism was the norm.

Today it is quite the opposite. Today there is more a feeling of “this person is great, but I’m not going to try too hard or show any vulnerability because they likely won’t be in my life in 3 months”. I don’t envy young people today.

cxj · 2019-02-12T07:25:28+00:00

Early 30s here, in general it was easier to be out and social, talk people up of any age or any situation and the internet was only on desktop computers. Random groups of chicks that wouldn’t bang you would still absolutely talk to you, invite you out to shit etc and people seemed to enjoy bigger more frequent social events.

Now approaching a girl for almost any reason seems borderline creepy or actually creepy, like I keep this in mind and pro actively try to phrase things to rule out hitting on s girl as obviously as possible and minimize the interaction altogether. That open, free way of socializing has mostly disappeared. Everyone’s atomized and afraid.

BlindingTwilight · 2019-02-11T23:02:58+00:00

It’s so much easier. When I was 18 you would go to the local nightclubs and you needed looks or game. With online dating status becomes a thing do it adds another dimension to your appeal. On top of that there is just so much choice. You can date and bang several different girls a week if you have any reasonable mix of looks, game and status. Life is just too easy now, I am still in shape so even though I am older the 20 somethings still message me. I love online dating as I never really enjoyed cold approach. TBH any guy who says they enjoy cold approach is lying, it is terrifying.

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[deleted] · 2019-02-12T16:40:11+00:00

The last 5 years have become a waste of time. Women changed. The previous 5 where the absolute best.

diener_zweier_herren · 2019-02-12T16:48:59+00:00

I'm not super old but I vividly remember the time before social media and dating sites.

"dating" didn't exist here; so much so that the Dutch word for "date" is just the English word "date"; there is no Dutch word for it because it's a recent thing that really only happens via online dating; people still don't approach strangers in real life to ask them out and I hope that's never going to happen. A lot of people are pretty cynical about this American thing "dating" coming here—myself included—because I just don't think it's a healthy way to start a relationship.

You meet someone in a completely artificial setting where you "get to know them" as in you get to know the artificial fake version of themselves they put up to woo you.

When I was a teenager people just hung out with classmates and coworkers and at one point they were like "Well... I guess we're sort of SO's now?" and that was that.

goatismycopilot · 2019-02-12T16:51:18+00:00

People are less attractive and social media has eroded basic communications skills.

Christian_Kong · 2019-02-12T16:55:15+00:00

Near 40 here, most women and hot men have even more options and every type of relationship is easier to achieve for them since they can go through options online. Harder than ever for average guys and below average guys might as well be incels.

reluctantly_red · 2019-02-12T02:00:19+00:00

Things really haven't changed that much. Social media has made many women a bit more unreasonable but the world has always had its share of delusional people. Online dating has made life a bit easier for the highest value guys and a bit harder for the lowest (but the top guys always had it good and life has always sucked for the lowest). Once you get into actual dating things are pretty much exactly the same as they've always been.

Title	Hey old geezers, how has the dating landscape changed since online dating/social media got big?
Author	GreenPaint8976
Upvotes	8
Comments	151
Date	February 11, 2019 9:52 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/aplj9f/hey_old_geezers_how_has_the_dating_landscape/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/hey-old-geezers-how-has-the-dating-landscape.257272 https://theredarchive.com/post/257272

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