If the father was adamant about not wanting a child would you still want it ?

a_vanillae · 2018-11-01T20:29:01+00:00

Two different questions here IMO.

Would I want it? Yes. Would I keep it? If it was looking like I'd be a single parent, probably not. Some people are prepared for solo parenting. I'm not one of them.

Also pertinent: even if I went through with an abortion, the relationship would probably be over. The only caveat to that is if genetic testing revealed markers for some serious abnormality. I'd really love to hear what TRP thinks of TFMR since so many seem to think abortion is the ultimate expression of hypergamy.

PennnyLame · 2018-11-01T21:18:10+00:00

I cannot fathom being in a reactionary situation like this. If I am not legally committed to a person that I plan to co-parent with, I would not want to carry any pregnancy to term. It would not be a situation of me being pregnant, unsure of my partner’s stance and then impacted by his decision. That is some trashy shit.

TheChemist158 · 2018-11-01T20:35:19+00:00

I wouldn't keep the kid regardless of the father's wants. Kids suck.

belletaco · 2018-11-01T19:58:01+00:00

if i wanted a kid and was emotionally and financially ready to take on that responsibility 100% alone i would have it. i personally don't see myself ever being in that situation though.

321PK · 2018-11-01T20:30:26+00:00

No way. I couldn’t do that alone. I mean, what if it was a boy????

[deleted] · 2018-11-01T20:54:16+00:00

If I was dead set on having children (which I am, but in the future) and was with a man who was not, I would stop being in a relationship with that man. If I were already pregnant and he got cold feet, I would sooner have a child on my own than a miserable partner.

Orange_Paisley · 2018-11-01T21:40:17+00:00

I already raised one kid by myself; I am sure I could handle a 2nd.

[deleted] · 2018-11-01T22:59:37+00:00

It depends

killallthenarcs · 2018-11-01T21:17:07+00:00

Like if the father of my very real children decided to disown them? Well of course I'd lose the guy not the kids, what do you think I am? Kick his manky butt to the curb and ride off into the sunset with my daughters.

kandyapplez · 2018-11-01T22:20:45+00:00

there is no scenario wherein i'd have a baby outside of marriage

quotient_is · 2018-11-01T22:37:53+00:00

No children for me at all, thanks. It would be worse if I was pregnant and he desperately wanted it.

wigglyshark · 2018-11-02T02:19:00+00:00

Yes. Before I had sex with my husband for the first time, I made it perfectly clear that I would never consider abortion if we had an accidental pregnancy. If something were to happen to my marriage and I ended up back in the dating pool, I would never start a sexual relationship without giving the "no abortion" disclaimer, which I know would probably drive most guys away. This is why I have never had casual sex and why I waited until marriage (with a guy who has talked for years about having lots of children) to begin trying for a baby.

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rizenphoenix13 · 2018-11-01T22:47:11+00:00

I would want it, I would keep it, and I wouldn't charge him child support, because having it isn't his decision. Not going to kill a baby just because the father doesn't want it. I've been in a situation with my current husband where his ex would have owed us child support had we pressed the issue; it's easier to just not deal with her. Fuck the money.

RockinSocksII · 2018-11-02T01:01:34+00:00

I don't want children, so no?

BookwormJane · 2018-11-02T03:49:44+00:00

No. I want a father to be present and willing to the raise the child.

DXBrigade · 2018-11-02T21:37:29+00:00

If I could afford the kid by myself then yes. But I would never fall pregnant on purpose behind someone's back.

[deleted] · 2018-11-02T23:49:49+00:00

No, i'd be jumping for joy. we could swing by planned parenthood hand in hand.

i do not want children and while most men seem to be like "oh i don't want kids" they are LIARS. it is VERY DIFFICULT to find a man anywhere who does not want children of his own over the age of 30. it seems like if the condom breaks, half the time he's trying to force kids on you.

ratsparadedarapstar · 2018-11-03T02:21:33+00:00

I'd have that shit vacuumed out before he ever knew it happened to begin with, as I never want children.

Copper IUD is great BC, and my longterm partner knows where I stand on this, so it's all good.

TheMedsPeds · 2018-11-03T07:56:04+00:00

If I got pregnant by the richest, nicest dude in the world who wanted nothing more to be a dad I still wouldn't want to keep it because I don't want kids. So if I got pregnant by a guy that also didn't want a kid that would work out quite well (except for the whole getting pregnant thing)

agloelita · 2018-11-03T20:38:07+00:00

Yes.

[deleted] · 2018-11-05T02:15:47+00:00

I wouldn't have a kid. If he didn't want a kid we would be on the same page lol.

Mazzic518 · 2018-11-01T20:30:25+00:00

Why would I care if my father didn’t want me to have kids?

Eartherry · 2018-11-01T20:54:46+00:00

Would him not wanting the child be enough to convince me, someone that does, not to have it?

That's an interesting question. I was going to say yes, but that means he's going to be on the hook for child support. Our kid will have to live knowing one parent doesn't care about them. And it's not like I can't just find another guy who wants kids to try with.

Title	If the father was adamant about not wanting a child would you still want it ?
Author	Volthoom3
Upvotes	1
Comments	50
Date	November 1, 2018 7:56 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/9tcv5n/if_the_father_was_adamant_about_not_wanting_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/if-the-father-was-adamant-about-not-wanting-a.259211 https://theredarchive.com/post/259211

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