664,807 posts

Books for her.

by mrbadassmotherfucker | October 14, 2019 | askMRP

18 upvotes

Reddit View

My latest OYS for reference... https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/dbqaao/_/f23duvb?context=1000

I'm just over 2 months into my RP journey now and things are going pretty well. Even when they arnt going pretty well, I'm anticipating that and making sure I hold frame, game and generally make sure I am happy.

My wife has obviously noticed the gargantuan amount of reading I've done sinse picking up RP. I told her at the start the books were all about self improvement. It seems to have struck home with her now and maybe she feels like there's some catching up to do on her behalf, but she asked me if there were any books like mine for her to read.

I guess she wants to improve.

Either way, I was interested in if any of you guys had passed on any books to your wives that helped them with self improvement. Maybe they found out about RP accidentally and read some of the material, if so, was it helpful?

I wouldn't tell her shit about RP, fight club right, but is there any material she could read that isn't directly RP?

Cheers bros!


Post Information
Title Books for her.
Author mrbadassmotherfucker
Upvotes 18
Comments 49
Date 14 October 2019 06:52 PM UTC (9 months ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/290528
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/dhv3ij/books_for_her/
Similar Posts

TRP terms found in post
Click to open them on Dictionary

Comments

[–]SepeanRed Beret9 points10 points  (3 children) | Copy

My wife liked “the surrendered wife” by Laura Doyle, but it requires her wanting to submit first.

Any self help book would help, wouldn’t it? “7 habits of highly effective people”, if she read that and did half the stuff it suggested, that would be great.

You could also just go by subject. Something on fitness and diet, parenting, home organization, etc.

But really, this all comes from you. Your SMV makes her want to step up, your frame and boundaries channel it into what you want. Books will only ever provide details that refine her execution.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Yeah, I'm not too bothered if she reads something that helps, or doesn't read anything. Either way I'm progressing.

If there's something out there for her to read that makes her all that more submissive and helps her understand the changes to the boundaries in our relationship then fair play.

I'll give any suggestions a read first if they're available online and see what the book has to say, so thanks for the ideas.

[–]SepeanRed Beret2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

If there's something out there for her to read that makes her all that more submissive and helps her understand the changes to the boundaries in our relationship then fair play.

This is a battle of frames. She will never read anything that will make her more submissive or accepting of your boundaries. You have to make all that happen by being alpha.

Her primary goal is not to improve your marriage, it is to test your frame. Even if she was convinced she’d be so happy submitting, she’d still only do it if you were alpha. And if you’re alpha, getting her to submit comes naturally and easily.

My point is, this should be about her improving. It sounds like she’s ready for that in many areas, so guide her to effectively improving her value to you, both in where she should apply her efforts and how.

But giving her fitness advice if she’s not willing to go the gym won’t help, and giving her the surrendered wife won’t work if she’s not submissive.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Well, I'd say I've got a bit to go first before introducing that book to her then. She's definitly following my lead, but she's not 100% submissive. Yet.

I'll look into some self improvement books for her for now. Maybe something that will also get some ideas rolling around her head for sex and trying new things.

I've been guiding her well there recently, trying some dominating techniques like tying her up and restraining. (never really done that before).

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

The surrendered wife was gold. Teaches red pill through a Christian lense for women.

[–]SepeanRed Beret4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

My wife is 100% atheist and still liked it

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly. It's a good book and I wish I could credit who told me to get it, might have been you.

[–]bowhunter8574 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

My wife liked empowered wife by Laura Doyle. The thing you have to watch with female self help material is it almost always more so encouragement than help. It seems like they just wanna read how to be happy the way they are instead of taking ownership. I think Laura Doyle is much better at making them see that shits that’s wrong is sometimes their fault and they can fix it too.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'll make sure to look into that one. Thanks for the suggestion.

Laura Doyle seems to be pretty popular for this kind of thing.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

Eat. Pray. Love.

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMod / Red Beret5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

LOL!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (9 children) | Copy

I don't know... my wife found MRP and devoured a lot of materials.

Seems to have worked out ok. Will post in my OYS tomorrow.

Have her read WISNIFG and then you can get into infinite loops about wanting your meat.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'll be sure to read your OYS.

Haha, I can imagine the broken record loop now! Could be fun.

[–]Iammrp20 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy

So.. after your wife finds your reddit account and hits the nuclear option, emails all your friends and family she then reads MRP books and gets "saved"? Wow.

[–]SepeanRed Beret4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

My wife found my account, read everything I wrote and freaked out completely too. And ended up with “the surrendered wife” on her night stand.

All these outbursts and feelings they have, it’s not something you should place much stock in. It’s temporary, heat of the moment stuff. They always fall back to reflecting your frame.

It’s your frame that sets her right, not what she reads.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

That’s an oversimplified version of events. But fairly accurate. Add in iron frame and guidance from HornsOfApathy and you’re pretty much correct

[–]HornsOfApathyMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

someone took the redpill this weekend.

[–]RStonePT2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

If you cant stand by shit you do, why do it?

[–]hack3geRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I’m not sure why guys don’t get this - if my wife found this place I would respond with “And....?”

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

So you are describing child support?

[–]Iammrp20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

[–]HornsOfApathyMod / Red Beret3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I can only speak from personal experience what is RP and what I've put in front of her and why. These were in order.

All in Audible format, it's what worked for my wife.

First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors by Laura Doyle. Why: My wife had anger issues and being thankful for what she has in her husband. This cracked open her mind that she was a frigid bitch to a man who might actually be high quality and she was fucking her own happiness based on her momentary feelz.

The Subtle Art of Not giving a F*ck by Mark Manson. Why: I saw my wife struggling with trying to please too many people and not focusing on those that are important - like me and the kids.

The Surrendered Wife by Laura Doyle. Why: I wanted a D/s relationship. This was a way for her to wrap her head around the idea of surrendering, or submitting to me.

Submissive Training: Be Sexually Vulnerable, Explore your Fantasies.... by MSMFBC. Why: After introducing D/s, she wanted to know how to be a good sub, and find her calling as a submissive. There were a ton of vulnerability issues to work through which, when pushed through, create massive trust in a relationship.

[–]ImNotSlash3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

See if /r/RedPillWomen has resources

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Took some hunting (and interesting reading of some of the posts on there), but here is their official reading list.

https://www.reddit.com/r/redpillwomen/comments/5bp1p9/_/

Some of the books mentioned in this post are on there. Has anyone read or given their wife any of the books on this list not yet mentioned in this post?

[–]teaandtalk2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

Tricky question! "Self improvement" is important, but it's not as big a thing in the female spaces of the pill-o-sphere. Most of the books we discuss in RPW are more to do with relationship skills, and possibly fall outside of 'self improvement' per se. By their nature, they're more suited to women who are already open to the ideas of male/female nature, complementary relationships, etc. It depends what you think your wife is open to.

"Surrendered Wife" is probably the best bet, IF you don't think the title/cover will turn her off AND the Christian basis isn't going to be problematic. Make sure you get the actual book, not the one that's a series of stories of women putting the principles into action.

Outside of TRP, a book I've found super valuable that's more about self-improvement for women who aren't necessarily focused on it is "The Happiness Project" by Gretchen Rubin. Specifically because I think a lot of the problems in relationships comes from women not caring for themselves properly. Combine it with a beautiful planner/journal and pen (Kikki K is my favourite brand) and you have a gift that is very "I love you and want you to be happy" but also "here are tips to make your/our life better."

Hope this helps!

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for your input.

[–]MeansToABenz2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

What a good question!! Why not eat her any deep thinking philosophy book? Plato, etc... If her reasoning improves she should be a better wife correct?

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Depends if she'll actually engage in this kind of material. She needs something that won't go over her head, she's smart enough, but I wouldn't call her interlectual.

[–]Xtinamina1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

interlectual.

Yeah, I wouldn't call you that either.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for your analysis of my intellect. I'll make sure to remember that next time I'm trying to be clever.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don’t ever recommend reading for my wife. I could care less what she reads as long as she’s adding value and having sex whenever I want

[–]amalgamator1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Intimacy & Desire by David Schnarch - it’s the revised sequel to Passionate Marriage and it’s just more cohesive, easier to read and has the “4 point of balance” idea. Unfortunately, it’s out of print. I bought a used copy for me and the wife and it was helpful to build a “collaborative alliance” around unfucking our marriage. But this is advanced MRP - proceed with caution. We had already gone thru main event and we had formed a shared vision that we wanted to uplevel our marriage.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'll have a look and see if it's one for "later". Cheers.

[–]tap09885341 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The 5 Love Languages. The Anal Sex Positions Guide

[–]nantucketghost1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

My wife read and liked: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands

The Summary:

In her most provocative book yet, Dr. Laura urgently reminds women that to take proper care of their husbands is to ensure themselves the happiness and satisfaction they yearn for in marriage.

Women want to be in love, get married, and live happily ever after. Yet disrespect for men and disregard for the value, feelings, and needs of husbands has fast become the standard for male-female relations in America. Those two attitudes clash in unfortunate ways to create struggle and strife in what could be a beautiful relationship.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Great, thanks for the suggestion.

[–]Redpillbrigade172 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

Fifty Shades of Grey , obviously

[–]SoggyTrainCucked by machines1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This book honestly opened up a period of Dominance/Submission with me and Ms.SoggyTrain. We started doing shit we had never done before. Then we had kids and things went downhill (my fault) and I have yet to get it back there.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fifty shades of shit

[–]HornsOfApathyMod / Red Beret-2 points-1 points  (3 children) | Copy

Please, no.

source: in D/s 24/7.

[–]Redpillbrigade171 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Well you certainly sound advanced in BDSM if you’re doing D/s 24/7 and in that light the book may indeed be pure trash. But for the average middle age housewife who’s shamed about her naughty dreams, this book can work wonders. It’s women equivalent of pornhub.

If not, any other romance novel BS should to the trick.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Well, if you put it that way, maybe it's worth consideration. I've trashed it because the film was dire, but women love it so maybe it's worth it in that aspect.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Bullshit

[–]ManguZa0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Fascinating Womanhood is really good.

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

First rule of Fight Club. Do NOT help your wife on her journey. She has to show her own initiative to find her own org; otherwise there is no meaning for her.

[–]JoeBuckYourslf0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

OP should've just shut the fuck up.

Instead he DEERed like a good boy:

My wife has obviously noticed the gargantuan amount of reading I've done sinse picking up RP. I told her at the start the books were all about self improvement.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yep, when I begun RP I DEERed



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2020. All rights reserved.

created by /u/dream-hunter