For those of you who were/are highly inhibited, were you able to change your habits after discovering RP?

jansolo76 · 2020-05-20T09:45:47+00:00

For all struggeling: Just keep in mind, you forget most conversations after 5 minutes. So do they.

Maybelowsmv · 2020-05-20T09:13:45+00:00

Yes, I was able to change my habits. A big part of it is who you are friends with. If your closest friends are high-inhibition types then you'll probably stay that way. I became friends with those with low impulse control and their behaviour naturally became my behaviour. I went from being an indoor, gamer with no confidence to hating being inside for too long, not having touched video-games for years (to this day, the idea of loading up a video-game bores me) and I developed a tendency to not really care what people think of me which helps with confidence.

TRP's place in this was that self-reflecting on who I was and who I wanted to be helped me mould myself into somebody that I could actually look at in the mirror be proud of. Some days I can't help but look at myself in the mirror. I understand that I'm not the best looking or the greatest person in the world but I damn well feel like it.

The end result is someone who now frequents social events and, instead of standing in the corner with a drink in my hand, I actually talk to people and have a good time and women enjoy my company. With this being said, women were the initial motivation to do all of this but after a few months they became a by-product, it wasn't about them anymore and that helped with becoming better at socialising in general rather than with the intention of getting laid.

QuestionablePresenc3 · 2020-05-20T11:09:53+00:00

In the end, no, it didn't really change me all that much. Well, dunno if I can really credit RP for that, but reading self improvement related stuff made me more open to various new experiences like travelling to different countries, trying new physical hobbies (from lifting and yoga to wakeboarding and scuba diving) or regular hobbies (things like camping, baking or even cross stitching).

However, when it comes to socializing, I'm still the same shy and awkward person who has no idea how to be confident, so my dating life is just as dead as it always was. Even though it's not impossible to get a date (thank you OLD), I have no idea how to flirt and escalate, so I quickly lose interest, and I'm not nearly attractive enough for women to do all the work for me.

Maybelowsmv · 2020-05-20T09:35:19+00:00

I avoid social interactions because most people (especially women) are boring, cookie cutter, NPC cyphers with zero personality beyond their favourite Netflix shows. I can count on one hand the amount of times I’ve been impressed by anyone I’ve met.

The RP hasn’t shifted this reality at all. Instead, it has shown me that RP theories are basically just circle jerks for already sexually successful men who just want to unlock even more pussy. If you’re not tall and not good looking, give up and find other ways to spend your time.

webernicke · 2020-05-20T09:48:10+00:00

were you able to change your habits after discovering RP?

Sort of.

In my case, the situation was that I was terrible at everything to do with dating initially but eventually got better at it and then later discovered RP, finding that it confirmed a written down path of what I had already learned the hard way.

Anyhow, during my learning process I ended up developing a kind of separate personality, so separate that I even gave "him" a different name. There was the "classic" me...the one that my parents and family knew, the inhibited, timid, quiet, loser me that never could get laid. Then there was "cool" me...a drastically different personality that was the life of the party, a confident, fearless cocky/funny playboy, and someone who definitely got laid. I liked "cool" me better and away from my family and old friends I felt for a time like that was the "real" me.

The truth is that I'm really somewhere in the middle. I am greatly suppressed when I am around the people that "knew" me growing up and I think that this had a negative impact on my early love life. But I also am putting on a bit of deliberate performance when I want to be attractive. Which is what works to be fair.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2020-05-20T09:58:30+00:00

Yep. I went to take the plunge and hit the gym, start a succesful business, leave my ex, meet amazing women.

Anxiaty was still there, but I still managed to make a move in life.

Jimmy-Turnchapel · 2020-05-20T12:14:56+00:00

Yes I was. Although this was way before Red Pill existed and came from the Pick-Up era and specifically after reading Strauss’ The Game.

I worked on my posture, body language, learned what the general mass considered « confident » (mostly things I considered ridiculous) and being naturally good looking and well dressed I went from unattractive to attractive almost overnight.

It introduced me to Tony Robbins and finally to Stoic Philosophy so was another 5-7 before I had what they call inner game and achieve fearlessness and mental peace.

It was a long process to conquer my anxiety, low self esteem, insecurity and depression but game changed my life. It starts with girls but ends with yourself.

Girls are just a metaphor really. And as everyone will tell you when you achieve the point where you are totally comfortable in your own skin and need nothing from nobody ... you found yourself getting attention from all angles. God smiled ;-)

wtknight · 2020-05-20T13:00:15+00:00

[removed]

MuleFool42 · 2020-05-20T14:10:45+00:00

I had a little bit of that but I was always pretty social and grew to feel more comfortable saying what came to mind in the moment - on my own.

The only thing that RP did was make me not care what anyone's reaction was. I wasn't afraid of saying the wrong thing any more, which I guess is the other side of it. Life is a lot easier when you no longer worry about what other people think. You may care, but ultimately it's their issue.

Mr-LBN · 2020-05-20T14:31:31+00:00

No. I've tried on and off here and there to fix my high inhibition and dislike for high social activity scenes since 2011 (HS) and have failed every chance I've ever had. The best I can do is probably walk into a bar by myself and maybe talk to someone for 3-5 minutes before becoming frustrated, tired, or completely blank. I literally need an activity aside from socializing in any scenario to not come off as the guy who just stands there in total apathy or some form of covert anxiety that no one seems to be able to detect. At best I can drink a lot before walking into a social scene and possibly be able to navigate, but it never amounts to anything.

The one time I succeeded was in HS my senior year and became popular. I wanted to blow my brains out because I literally dismissed everything about who I really was to appeal to a crowd that never gave a shit about who I really was, not that they should or that who I naturally am is universally likeable.

It doesn't help that I have the most boring hobbies (designing maps for Classic DOOM, Drawing, Writing fiction, working out, making tracks for an old N64 game), that even I find stressful and somewhat tedious and in some cases unfulfilling partly due to bipolar disorder depressive.

I feel like a very high functioning person with aspergers who can mimick and feign emotions and social skills but not feel or relate to others very well even if we have the same interests. It also doesn't help that I have no real life experience since I've been poor all my life, in and out of the hospital due to psychosis, and never made a plan to succeed in life so I can't really keep up in conversation with people who've been able to experience what life is supposed to be about in your 20s.

gunbusterxl · 2020-05-20T17:07:18+00:00

You should change the tag to [Question for Red Pill]. I'll still answer, though.

I'm a natural introvert. As such, I have to constantly force myself to be social or I'll fall into what I call "hermit mode" and go months without speaking to another person outside of work. Longest I've gone without doing anything social was a year and a half, and I have no intention on ever repeating that.

Serving in the military helped a lot, as you have no choice but to live in close proximity to a bunch of people for extended periods of time. You are also forced to constantly work together with people you've never met before. However, most strangers aren't really "strangers" as you already share some things in common and have similar goals and values. I've been out for 3 years now and I can still easily talk with any vet or active service member, especially Marines. I always thought those "Vet Hats" were ridiculous, and I still do, but I understand why old guys wear them now.

It also helps that for whatever reason, women approach me. I've given up on trying to understand why that is. I'm no chad, not even close, but I still get asked out. Almost all of my relationships were initiated by the woman. I can approach women, but I'll only do so for ones I'm extremely attracted to. Currently, I'm not looking for a relationship (and I don't do casual sex) so I'm not approaching anyone at all.

KV-n · 2020-05-20T23:35:20+00:00

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RedPill_is_a_cult · 2020-05-20T09:49:40+00:00

The way the question is worded makes it seem like it's just for redpill guys, but the flair says q4m, so I'll share. Dealt with depression and severe social anxiety through my teen years up to my early/mid twenties before I started to change things. A close, supportive network of friends and lots of therapy were my vehicles for change though.

Edit: as for the results, I'm no longer depressed, I have an improved perception of self worth, and I can handle groups of more than six without panic attacks

TheBookOfSeil · 2020-05-20T13:25:20+00:00

Yes and no. I’m still pretty inhibited in that I don’t cold-approach anyone, but for those that I do end up talking to, I have no issues being myself and opening up.

jax006 · 2020-05-20T14:46:07+00:00

Yea kinda. It's not like I became super popular chadlite outgoing fun & cool dude. But I have quite a bit more confidence holding my ground in social situations than 5years ago.

TheGirlGetter9000 · 2020-05-20T16:53:04+00:00

Yes but I made a fool of myself many times along the way. I'm at a much more balanced place now.

I think much of my change was actually just unleashing what was already within me internally. I'd been raised BP and inhibited but I felt a RP pull the whole time.

LowCreddit · 2020-05-20T19:14:00+00:00

I changed it before TRP existed. I used to only socialize with a small group of friends. It just took years of practice. It's a skill like anything else. I find any book on the subject is stupid. You need to just grind it out.

2020-06-11T10:48:35+00:00

Yeah, the main realisation for me was I can change my circumstance.

That changed my whole world. I went from believing I was a loser who should be put down, to actually enjoying life and all it entails. It helped me create a focus on my career, it used to just be some shit I had to do cuz society says so. But now I have a job I enjoy. It motivated me to goto the gym.

All this gave me a lot of belief and confidence in myself. So social situations did not seem so scary as I did not view everyone as better than me in every aspect of life anymore.

sadomasochrist · 2020-05-20T15:34:45+00:00

I was socially outgoing but personally inhibited before. But I'm completely uninhibited now.

If yes, how did you manage it and what were the results?

It's a natural outcome from realizing most of the reasons you remained inhibited were because you thought it would make you happier for whatever reason(s).

Inhibition is a prison you build for yourself. Women don't respect it, and it's not enjoyable.

Put the mask on when you're around groups of high betas.

Title	For those of you who were/are highly inhibited, were you able to change your habits after discovering RP?
Author	Maybelowsmv
Upvotes	13
Comments	92
Date	May 20, 2020 8:51 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/gn7u4k/for_those_of_you_who_wereare_highly_inhibited/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/for-those-of-you-who-wereare-highly-inhibited-were.665402 https://theredarchive.com/post/665402

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