This is what I grew up with

gursky0 · 2020-01-07T00:35:07+00:00

"Don't be a woman"

rftw2013 · 2020-01-07T00:57:48+00:00

Dear men,

Please stop raping women. Then we don't need lists like this.

Signed,

Women everywhere

alanonhelp777 · 2020-01-07T01:46:19+00:00

Thanks, ladies. It was 20+ years ago and I still, once in a blue moon, have PTSD episodes from it. My dad blaming me was totally emblematic of our relationship. He died long ago.

Rape doesn’t go away. Like all trauma, it stays with you. You learn to live with it. You can heal. You can move forward. You can learn to recognize that it’s part of your story but not the definition of who you are. You CAN. It takes work and time and therapy. And it never 100% goes away. But it gets better.

Also: instead of teaching women how not to get raped, how about we work on teaching men not to rape?!

jewdy09 · 2020-01-07T00:44:19+00:00

My friend told me about a Tinder date he had recently. The gal he was chatting with wanted to meet him despite it being around 9PM but she didn’t have a car. He was game to pick her up and go for a beer but when he arrived she had her young daughter with her. As soon as she got in his vehicle, she lit up a cigarette without even asking.

He drove them to a nice place that serves only microbrews. He then finds out she had already had a 6 pack and was living in an inexpensive housing situation that was intended for summer tourism industry people and it didn’t have heat. It wasn’t too cold for that yet, but it was getting there and it certainly wasn’t ideal for a young child. It turns out, she was meeting people in hopes that they would offer her and her child a place to stay for the night.

My response was that that was a great way to get your daughter raped. My fiend actually seems to be a decent person and was taken aback by my assertion. So, I put it into the perspective of his ex wife doing the same thing with one of his young kids. I doubt he grasped the magnitude of the risk that woman put herself and her child in, though he did find it wildly inappropriate at least.

A big part of the problem with violence against women and girls is that there are men who are decent people and of course can’t empathize with how vulnerable women are to the men who are not decent. Women have spent so much time shutting up about the shitty things that have been done to them by shitty men because of the consequences to themselves that decent men simply don’t understand how bad women have it.

alanonhelp777 · 2020-01-07T00:38:56+00:00

Still got raped. And my dad blamed me for it.

gcthrowaway2019 · 2020-01-07T01:53:47+00:00

And then we still get raped.

ThrowAway3879284 · 2020-01-07T01:59:09+00:00

[deleted]

Throwaway0220170 · 2020-01-07T04:34:54+00:00

What if you live in a country that doesn't allow civilians to just carry guns with them everywhere? What if the rapist is your husband or a male friend you invite into your home? Are we supposed to be armed in our own homes too?

What if a woman is not in a financial situation to decline a job that forces her to work late at night and she has to rely on public transportation to get home?

"Get a strong bf" Just fucking lol, patriarchy truly is an international protection racket. Prostitute yourself to a strong male bodyguard to make sure the other males don't take you by force. Just awful.

"Learn how to fight" is a meme. Most women can't dedicate the necessary time to become MMA experts and a lot of men already spend a lot of time lifting weights and learning how to fight. A lot of women barely weight over 100 pounds and have disproportionately lower muscle mass than men. So tell me how my 110 pound mother is supposed to defend herself against a 200 pound man who can lift more than twice her body weight? Even if she were trained and he were not, there is a certain point where strength makes training redundant.

So let me get this straight... Unless women train and arm themselves like Rambo at all times, live the lives of hermits and recluses, avoid all social contact with their male schoolmates, teachers, bosses, caregivers, and coworkers, and inject themselves with testosterone so that they have a chance of fighting men, it's our fault if we get raped? Lol, how convenient for these smegs. No rape would ever be the rapists fault. Women could only "win" if they adopt the desperate "death before dishonor" mindset about getting raped. Because apparently if you survive a rape, it means you secretly wanted it.

extraacct1234 · 2020-01-07T01:04:00+00:00

If the man is decent he understands because he sees and listens. It's literally everywhere for men to see. Don't buy ignorance, either he's lying or or he's a misogynist who will never care about your problems.

letsberealforamoment · 2020-01-07T00:44:01+00:00

I agree that women should learn how to fight and use weapons. Women are socialized to be passive and weapons training makes a woman truly powerful. Knowing you have the ability to take out an aggressive LVM is true power. Everything else on the list is rubbish.

SpookySparkle7 · 2020-01-07T18:22:02+00:00

How to decrease your chances of being raped:

don't go to house parties
don't do hard drugs or drink excessively in the company of men
don't be alone with a man
always be in very public areas on dates
commit RIGHT NOW to reporting that shit if it happens no matter what. Predators can sense weakness.

NoThisIs-Patrick · 2020-01-07T05:21:12+00:00

That's my bad, that's my bad, no one taught them not to grab

9penguin · 2020-01-07T08:03:30+00:00

Real how to avoid getting raped:

Learn self defense

Bring weapon or a gun

Kill them before they rape you

rainbowforeskin · 2020-01-07T17:09:38+00:00

Yes but the point of this post is that most women DO have to take these types of precautions and then they still get raped. If you read the comments in this post, about peoples experiences and then that Fran Dresher story. You could be sitting at home with a friend drinking wine in your pjs and still get raped.

dntevenknow · 2020-01-07T02:47:42+00:00

I don’t disagree with this. But that’s only because men are assholes. Not that we should have to do these things.

Adela-Siobhan · 2020-01-07T13:08:22+00:00

That particular tweet:

3,944 comments

896 likes

The guy has been ratio’d.

He continues to tweet to bring attention to himself.

Title	This is what I grew up with
Author	rainbowforeskin
Upvotes	54
Comments	38
Date	January 7, 2020 12:30 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/el37g7/this_is_what_i_grew_up_with/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/this-is-what-i-grew-up-with.685410 https://theredarchive.com/post/685410

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