I am curious about this because I feel that whether or not you commit to a man basically rests on 3 things 1) attractive character qualities and personality, chemistry, true love for you 2) ability to be the masculine energy in your relationship (may or may not include being the provider, etc) 3) physical attraction.

In my experience if a guy has 1&2, he doesn't have to be "" objectively "" attractive (e.g. chiseled face, six pack) but as long as he is still sexually attractive to me, I would consider a relationship with him.

In the past I've dated RP guys who weren't conventionally attractive and my friends would say I am "settling" just based on looks alone. I currently really like a guy who I think has an insanely attractive personality and is handsome, but I know many women would not think he is attractive. A wonderful personality and assertiveness, as well as mutual chemistry (e.g. banter and sexual chemistry) makes men more attractive to me. Is anyone the same way?

I know if I start dating this new guy it will seem like I am "dating down", although he is way more established than me in his career and finances/abilities at this point (he's a working professional in a super lucrative field while I am finishing graduate school). Physically, I am probably a 8 and a 9 with makeup/hair styling. He's probably a 5 or 6 (but honestly way hotter in my eyes).

I'm honestly tired of people saying I have been " settling" or "you can do better" when I was dating men who were physically less "" objectively "" attractive. They even say that if a hotter guy comes along it will be hard for me not to stray, which is crazy. How do you ladies deal with this?