Many women get frustrated when the men they flirt to don't get the hint. In today's age, many men do get the hint, but don't act on it because the consequences and stakes for misinterpreting it are much higher and severe

jackedtradie · 2021-05-28T07:33:01+00:00

Women in my life always say “why don’t you ask that girl at the gym/shops out”

They don’t realise that in person flirting is dying because the line between being a charming harmless guy and a perverted sex creep are being blurred

Am I really gonna say hi to the cute girl at the gym who keeps looking over at me? Maybe she wants me to, but one wrong move and I’m kicked out of the gym and labelled a creep.

No thanks

d_nijmegen · 2021-05-28T06:17:52+00:00

I'm going to need a signed and dated consent form, only then I will stop pretending not to noticing.

sicrm · 2021-05-28T05:56:22+00:00

the juice isn’t worth the squeeze.

ceson · 2021-05-28T08:31:54+00:00

I honestly never got the hint. Ever. Not once. My current partner actually had to tell me to kiss her for me to realize she was romantically interested and not just a drinking buddy for the night.

On a class trip in high school, this cute girl took me to her room for me to give her a massage (I've got strong hands). She went out of her way to make sure we wouldn't be disturbed. She removed her top, looked at me longingly, even asked me to remove my shirt... and all I could think was "Imma show you my mad massaging skills". It actually took me a couple of years for me to realize what I missed.

Drunk me is an idiot.

D0wnVoteMe_PLZ · 2021-05-28T08:20:05+00:00

Reading the hints is not that hard, but the consequences can be life-changing if things go wrong.

I'm not an MGTOW or anything but I am always careful about this. Even one wrong move can ruin your life.

UnconventionalXY · 2021-05-28T06:27:13+00:00

A flirt is not a promise but a risky incitement of arousal that can lead to more than just frustration for the man. The stakes for a detrimental outcome are simply too high to risk these days.

Leather-Cash-513 · 2021-05-28T08:11:46+00:00

Because they need to learn to close the deal. That’s why. They need to stop relying on us to take their “hints” and ask for the number and schedule the date.

Hiplo_0 · 2021-05-28T07:58:44+00:00

Or we get the hint and aren't interested

CarelessTrifle5242 · 2021-05-28T06:33:09+00:00

You can act as per her imagination. Any slight deviation (0.0001%) get ready for character assassination and being labelled as prep!

Odd_Cryptographer492 · 2021-05-28T08:35:09+00:00

Today flirting with women is dangerous because if you do and they feel threatened your a creep then come the abuse. Always play dumb to a women they have to feel there in control of the situation.

kitecurbkicker · 2021-05-28T08:31:32+00:00

I've been too busy to notice any flirts. Only once did I ever respond that I wasn't attracted to my boss after she hit on me. I was fired the next day. Never again.

workinfast1 · 2021-05-28T11:38:23+00:00

The place I currently work at hired this really cute housekeeper. She would always find me and flirt. We would talk about movies, hobbies and all around life stuff. I had a couple coworkers come up to me saying I should ask her out and that she seemed genuinely interested and good chemistry. Shortly after that I decided to give her my number. She blushed and thanked me. I told her that I hoped she called or texted and we can hang out, go see a movie or whatever, and it doesn’t have to be a date, just two like minded individuals having a night out that doesn’t need to lead anywhere. She agreed and said she’d like that.

Well, two days later I get hauled up to HR. Someone filed a sexual harassment complaint against me. I was so damn confused. But, I had a feeling I knew who it was and yep, the bitch claimed it was sexual harassment, for simply giving her my number.

When the investigation launched, they called my two coworkers in to get a statement from them. They had my back though, and said she was very flirtatious and even seemed happy when I gave her my number, and they were equally confused as I was.

As the investigation rolled around, I kept thinking I was going to lose my job, for simply asking someone out and giving her my phone number. I couldn’t believe that could be considered sexual harassment! I was so confused, angry and bewildered at all of this. I mean, I saw all the signs that she was interested. She would find me at work and start conversations. Jesus man, I was freaking out. Here I am, a single father. Been working for my employer for ten years. This job provided health insurance, a fantastic paycheck and a livelihood for my daughter and I, and I’m going to lose it because asking someone out and giving my phone number to someone who showed every sign that she was interested could be construed as sexual harassment. I couldn’t believe it!

After a month of investigation, I was cleared. Nothing was done to the housekeeper. Eventually she was driven out by all of my coworkers who witnessed this event first hand.

But, the moral of my story is, I will no longer, ever, make any advances on anyone in the workplace. However, this could happen anywhere. It’s just not safe for guys to even exist any longer. What a sad time.

Punder_man · 2021-05-28T09:02:26+00:00

The difference between a woman seeing you as flirting vs you being a creep directly correlate to whether or not she finds you attractive..

It can also be the difference between getting a date and getting a restraining order / sexual assault accusation..

The women whom are getting frustrated at men not getting the hint when they flirt to them should blame feminists and their rhetoric of "All men are potential rapists" to see where this problem has come from..
Many men GET the hint but due to the current social climate they are afraid to act upon that hint because in today's society women hold the power to destroy the lives of men..

I'm not MGTOW.. but I can see where they are coming from in regards to this.

noiamnotabanana · 2021-05-28T09:52:00+00:00

Long before me too, I realized that it was more efficient for a girl/woman to make the first move.

JacobiusMaximus · 2021-05-28T11:28:23+00:00

Women wield the power of the government gun and public opinion.

Rockbottom503 · 2021-05-28T08:23:52+00:00

Can't change your mind because I know just as well as anyone else that it's true.

hr_kules · 2021-05-28T09:04:35+00:00

This resonates really with me. If i wouldn't have a gf right now, i wouldn't mind trying to talk to girls, because i would be way to scared to recieve the stamp as a molestor

Magical-Hummus · 2021-05-28T10:14:57+00:00

I mean, I like flirting but these women could also just straight up ask "Wanna go out?" instead of doing that hint game. Some men, including me, like the hint game but you cannot deny it is also flawed communication thus not many will perceive your message the intended way.

2021-05-28T10:03:48+00:00

That, and I think the whole "hint" thing is thinly veiled cowardice in most instances.

Revorob · 2021-05-28T10:06:13+00:00

No arguement fom me. 100% correct.

I-am-sad_ · 2021-05-28T10:33:53+00:00

It is basically a roll of the dice and these days it is much more likely to go horrible

sickcheesecake · 2021-05-28T10:51:00+00:00

This sub is a heaven for clear thoughts and a save place for men.

I hope this stays forever.

reddboy1981 · 2021-05-28T10:45:31+00:00

It's been proven women will flirt with men they don't intend to sleep with for multiple reasons one it makes them feel good to see a man hang on her every word or gesture. Two it is a ways and means of getting something they want i.e. drinks dinner promotion at work a gift anything. three it's a clever tactic where by they flirt with a man he acts on it thinking she has romantic feelings for him but when he does she can react with shock and oh my god did you think line which puts you in her pocket

DanteLivra · 2021-05-28T12:32:10+00:00

Also, women are capable adults who can communicate effectively.

It's twisted that so many women expect the guy to make the first move when it's so punishing to get it wrong.

WingsofSky · 2021-05-28T12:34:25+00:00

You forget about the "1,000 times women have turned that man down".

After being stomped, hated, yelled and cursed at. You tend not to try.

Khaglist · 2021-05-28T12:56:30+00:00

Men don’t give a fuck about that and the only men that do are the type of men who would never be hit on in any situation anyway.

2021-05-28T10:16:11+00:00

Much bigger reasons for me to stay single forever Women are like wasps. Do one tiny false move and they'll fuck your shit up.

2021-05-28T09:13:37+00:00

Relationships are a fucking trap if you are a man with decent income and status. Women will just use you as a ladder to reach a high place. No thanks!

clocksfornipples · 2021-05-28T08:09:26+00:00

How is this anything to do with mens rights?

wearperson · 2021-05-28T11:45:55+00:00

This is why we need to break down gender roles of women being shy and indirect about these things. Once it's cool for women to be confident and assertive in dating it will be so damn much easier. That's why we need feminism.

pldit · 2021-05-28T08:58:56+00:00

Hey, don't let women assassinate men's nature. We are meant to be in control, if you feel like flirting, just flirt with confidence. If she doesnt like it just move on and don't forget the magic words when you turn your back at her: "I don't care"... don't say it, just think it. After that, don't give her any moment of attention ANYMORE IN HER LIFE.

That simple.

nettereuer · 2021-05-28T10:12:42+00:00

The bravery it took to post this in r/mensrights of all places, my god. So brave. I’m sure there are plenty of dissenting opinions here and this place isn’t at all an echo chamber of scared idiots who think the world has gone mad, while in reality flirting continues unabated out there even if some old farts lament the fact that you can no longer say “nice melons, toots” to a terrified woman twenty years younger who can do nothing but smile and say “thanks mister”.

I’m 29. I grew up in this supposed hellscape of political correctness gone mad. I have a girlfriend, some exes and some past bed partners that I hooked up with a few times. I have not once been accused of rape or sexual harassment, and all I had to do was not rape or sexually harass women.

If you’re scared of flirting, you’re probably being too aggressive about it. Learn to be a little more subtle and let her up the ante. If she’s into you, you’ll know. When in doubt she probably isn’t, and that’s fine, because there are plenty of other women out there waiting to hook up with you, I promise. It doesn’t matter who you are, how much money you make or what you look like. As long as you’re a halfway decent person, there’s a woman out there looking for you.

Edit: These downvotes just prove my point.

twinkletoestherman · 2021-05-28T06:06:44+00:00

They would definitely exist I'm sure. Biggest argument would be on number I think? Inequality affects us all in different ways

2021-05-28T08:23:14+00:00

I go for it anyways. I don’t care if I get rejected.

GhostButtTurds · 2021-05-28T11:29:45+00:00

Y’all are fuckin delusional. I live in a college town and go to plenty of social events. Don’t be a fucking weirdo and you’ll be fine

None of you have ever experienced this, don’t kid yourselves

ThatGuyFight · 2021-05-28T11:37:17+00:00

Man i can smell the Doritos in here. If people would consider your flirting to be harassment, then mebbe you should reevaluate how you flirt. Being respectful and politely backing down when asked/told to has at worst ended with me being out the cost of a drink.

Bunch of man-children that victimize themselves so they can feel better about their abrasive social encounters

GoatHorn420 · 2021-05-28T11:10:19+00:00

You can't apply this to 'many' this is just you a couple other weirdos pal

frustr8tion · 2021-05-28T11:14:08+00:00

I think a lot of people don't realise the implications of their approach and so don't realise how they come across.

Anyone can seem nice but if they're straight up asking for a date just because they've seen someone attractive it can be quite off-putting to realise they made their decision based solely on a silent observation.

Too many people jump the gun and go too far too quickly and think "All I did was compliment them and ask them out". Idk, how about just saying hi first, starting some casual conversation...

I can see a bunch of people in these comments saying how women shouldn't flirt with them if they have high status but then a bunch of others saying you'll be perceived as a creep if you flirt with them.

What's the difference between women finding guys creepy for wanting sex and men finding women shallow for wanting money?

Just the other day someone flipped out at me because I could tell they were trying to get me over to their place for sex and called out that they kept pushing even after I had refused. They popped off at me about how I didn't know their intentions but even admitted that was exactly their intention, but said I was rude for making the assumption.

They proceeded to then laugh at me for being disabled and not wanting to share that information with me and became very combative, all because I wouldn't go to their place as a perfect stranger.

I saw through their intentions, they didn't like it, they lashed out. I probably would have slept with them if they weren't so pushy but now that'll never happen because they've shown they'll feign respect to get sex.

Guys can tell when women just want money.

Women can tell when guys just want sex.

And when either gets rejected and blames the other party when they have selfish intentions and starts to blame the whole sex, that's both different types of incel. The end result is the same, raging out because you didn't charm someone into giving you what you want from them.

No one owes you anything. Not in dating.

Korruqt · 2021-05-28T09:46:50+00:00

No I won't. Your right

AccidentallyBorn · 2021-05-28T09:53:53+00:00

I know this is a serious issue but it reminded me of this video, which is very entertaining and relatable (for me at least).

DankoJones84 · 2021-05-28T12:35:21+00:00

Can confirm. Since I went MGTOW I've had women flirt with me and chose not to pursue them, simply because I don't see it as being worth it any more. Attractive women, ones I wouldn't have hesitated to jump into bed with in my 20s. But I know what the result would be: one of two outcomes.

#1: she uses me for sex for the purpose of making her ex feel jealous or just because she feels like cheating on her bf, then ghosts me. I end up feeling like an object and hate myself for allowing her to use me like that.

#2: we enter a relationship in which I'm used as a source of disposable income, cheated on, lied to, emotionally abused, and ultimately abandoned once a new mark catches her eye.

Either way I'm left with stress, depression, self-loathing, and nothing positive to show for it. After enough instances of this, I came to the realization that sex isn't worth what I'm put through in order to get it, and just quit caring. Then it became apparent that I'm actually much happier and in a better mental state when I don't have to deal with all that.

Add to this the fact that in the post-MeToo world, you can go to jail, lose your job, or even be beaten to death by strangers just for being accused of doing or saying anything improper to a female, and it becomes illogical to even speak to or be in the same room as one unless absolutely necessary.

If women have their self-esteem damaged when we reject their advances, too bad, so sad. They did it to themselves.

OuiOuis · 2021-05-28T12:44:54+00:00

I can't even tell if my own mother is complimenting me.

Caithloki · 2021-05-28T12:46:35+00:00

For me it's cause they are batting up the wrong tree. Lol it's still amusing tho, even more so since their who demeanor changes to buddy bud when they find out I'm gay.

HeForeverBleeds · 2021-05-28T12:53:14+00:00

I think it's hilarious when women take a man ignoring their advances as him being oblivious lol When it's more like "nah, I see you and am choosing to ignore"

EmceeHammer1 · 2021-05-28T12:54:52+00:00

Haha so true. The other day I was at this shop and this girl was flirting really hard. I definitely noticed but I try not to pick up women at their place of work. On top of the fact her work was absolutely slammed. She was asking me what I was doing later and saying she wanted to go to the park later and go on a walk. She even asked me for my name and phone number for a giveaway which I had to write down, it would have been really easy to ask for her number in that scenario or give her my number. I just wasn't going to put myself out there, it's not worth it.

MarcusOReallyYes · 2021-05-28T12:55:00+00:00

The weirdest thing is when they flirt while you have a wedding ring on, or are out with your kids.

It’s like, “I know you may not realize this because you’re used to attention from simps, but I’m not fucking interested as I clearly have a family.”

My wife thinks it’s funny, I do not.

realmtraveller · 2021-05-28T21:17:21+00:00

You mean in America

MAmoribo · 2021-05-28T09:03:04+00:00

this implies you aren't on a date OR dating. Ask "hey, let's go get coffee/to a quieter bar/catch a movie"

Even if the flirting is misinterpreted on your part, this is an easy way to prevent any 'high stakes'....

You're trying to defend sexual assault because "I didn't know any better. She was asking for it". No.

Ilikevats19737o · 2021-05-28T08:17:18+00:00

For me it's not about risk it's about about how they start saying that giving complements doesn't mena they like us so u can't know if they like u it not

YesAmAThrowaway · 2021-05-28T08:43:30+00:00

Yes and no

Able-Calligrapher-74 · 2021-05-28T08:59:52+00:00

I believe that flirting is complicated and people should acknowledge that the person opposite to them might not resonate perfectly with their definition of flirting. Hence, an understandable amount of misunderstandings.

However the best of girls out there will acknowledge the probabilty that they might have lead the guy on by mistake, or that it's understandable how the guy got confused in reading what she wants.

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