After Denial… Misogyny?

l3tsR0LL · 2023-09-22T22:51:33+00:00

Just focus on yourself. Other humans can be dealt with later

AdrianInLimbo · 2023-09-23T08:12:46+00:00

It's similar to someone who is bit by a dog, as a kid. For the rest of those lives, many people won't go near another dog.

It's not misogyny, it's more like PTSD.

Brilliant-Tomorrow55 · 2023-09-22T22:24:53+00:00

You likely made the mistake, like many of us, of putting your wife on a pedestal. Some of what you feel is normal. Give yourself some space to feel bad, feel like an idiot, etc. And remember that women are people too.... sometimes they can be assholes.

Makes it easier to see them less like a blob of hurtful mass and more like we all are...flawed. You're raw, it will pass if you don't put them on that pedestal in your mind.

sak144 · 2023-09-23T03:18:55+00:00

Don't hate women, just understand them better. Women lie. All of the time. Never listen to what they say, pay attention to what they do. View them as overgrown teenagers. They're flaky, not rational, and only do what their feelings tell them to do at any given moment.

With that said, I still like women - a lot, but I now have a very healthy set of boundaries and will never let one run all over me and steal half of what I worked for again. Ironically, when you have that attitude, they want you even more.

Best advice I ever heard on this forum is to treat a relationship with a woman like you would act having a pet tiger. Fun as hell and great to brag about, but you never know when they will turn on you and try to rip you to shreds. Act accordingly.

Ok_Perception_1836 · 2023-09-23T01:34:34+00:00

Women as a whole are driven almost entirely by instinct when it comes to mating. They start out doing their mating dance to coerce you into wanting them, then they want the ring as a symbol of status to feel validated as a woman, then they want children, then they eat your head like a black widow by realizing they no longer need anything more from you.

If being a misogynist is wrong, I don't want to be right. Women are like ticks. Sure, some don't carry lyme disease. Doesn't mean you should ever willingly subject yourself to being near them.

pk2at · 2023-09-22T23:56:01+00:00

You need to understand that a lot of wives behave badly as the government and divorce laws favor them. Dragging a man through court and looting him is bound to leave negative feelings towards the woman who caused it, but in reality its the biased system that causes most of the hurt. Think about it, if you are awarded all your money and full custody of kids, would you be feeling the same?

SuperConfused40 · 2023-09-23T04:30:05+00:00

Counseling

Journaling - just write out your thoughts and afterwards read them and they will give you clarity on the root causes and what is true.

techrmd3 · 2023-09-23T21:10:27+00:00

Look women today are Wiley coyotes with acme on speed dial

they insist on autonomy and independence but then f up their lives… crying man’s fault! As they fall to the desert floor

its not fair or good and water is still wet

realizing that women are not generally good in some judgement, frequently cruel and childish does not eliminate their usefulness to a heterosexual man.

the game is women are the way they are… use their own nature against them, reap benefits

dnbndnb · 2023-09-22T22:58:34+00:00

It’s a phase. You’ll get through it. “All women” and “all men” are not the same. Once the rawness of it all as passed, you’ll see individuals as individuals again.

Efficient-Mango7708 · 2023-09-22T22:31:10+00:00

Reading this forum, redpill, incel or mgtow you realize this is probably a pretty normal phase of the anger stage of grieving for men. You can feed the wolf of hate or not. How to stop negative thoughts is a big subject. For me meditation is helpful, actively focusing thoughts actions and improvements in other areas of life are helpful.

WartimeDad · 2023-09-23T17:42:37+00:00

I think step back and just see we have a culture problem. There is much sexism. Don’t feed into it. Notice it, and learn to despise the sexism when you see it. I’m disgusted each time I see misogyny or, perhaps more commonly, each time I see misandry.

I think the correct place to put your anger is not in ‘all women,’ but rather on stupid sexist people in general. Anyway please don’t contribute to the hate we need to go the other way. And occasionally you meet women like your friends that aren’t caught up in the stupid gender war. No need to socialize with people who are.

Rollercoaster72 · 2023-09-22T22:15:51+00:00

Yeah while you are reading here at this group this feeling of anti women thoughts does rise... I notice that too.

my experiences lately: I have 2 longterm (both 20 years) good femal me friends. One has a boyfriend and they have a child together. I met him after she already was 7 years together with her (shevhide him from me!) and I loved him, like I wanted to be instant best friends with him... and she wants to leave him I know ... and he doesn't know that yet... so that is kind of really fucked up...still she is my friend and I will help her if needed...

The other friend left her boyfriend of 6 years at around the same time I got fired as husband. Kind of the she wanted be a baby, he said he did too but eventually didn't. And now she is too old to get children... I know when we met for 20 years she was in love with me, but I couldn't cause I had a girlfriend (later my wife)... over the years we did kiss sometimes when we were drunk or high... my friend's longest relation was her last and all before him we 1-3 years relationships which all sucked. We met again first time after Covid, she is still wearing a mask and a bit crazier as before. But when we talked I realised she has been my best friend over all those years. She knows more about the real me than my stbxw...

I looked at her and I found her even more pretty than for 20 years.. and I almost instantly fell in love with her ... I can control my feelings so I put them away but the feeling about not liking women anymore went totally away with her...

she wants to, like all say here, first try to live with herself for a while. Which is ofc good and I should do so too. And I guess she tried to avoid me the past 3 months, cause this would be the first time in 20 years that the two of us are single and I guess she never wanted to be my second choice.

But from her came suggestions to do a tango dancing course as for doing something new with one's life, which I also wanted to do with my stbxw but never did ... but I told her about I need to get fit again first and we are planing to do once a week workout starting from october together ...

So no yes women suck, divorce sucks. men and women are 2 different life forms and totally hate eachother but also love eachother... we didn't get here cause we hate women we just love them too much

Title	After Denial… Misogyny?
Author	spozmo
Upvotes	26
Comments	35
Date	September 22, 2023 9:33 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/16pm4ed/after_denial_misogyny/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/after-denial-misogyny.1232700 https://theredarchive.com/post/1232700

Comments