Hello all, first post here. But this is really hitting me hard.

I 33M and my wife 29F are getting a divorce. We were married 8 years and together almost 10 years. We have 2 children together. She filed back in January. We had a fight, not more than any other fight I did not think. We never really had many fights, just irritable moments where one or the other was upset. She sent me a few texts about things she wanted me to change to stay together. I contemplated them for a day and before I could even respond to her and talk about them, she filed a temporary order alleging abuse (this did not happen) and named the children so she had custody of them signed by a judge while we waited for the hearing for this order. I am in Ohio and they grant these orders with little evidence just to be safe and make sure parties are safe. I get it, people are crazy. This meant I could not speak to her for 3 weeks. Not about our separation, not about the children, no contact at all.

The day comes for the hearing and I had contacted a lawyer who reviewed everything and told me the judge would not grant a full order based off her explanation. Great I thought. Finally we can have some communication and figure this out. In walks a lawyer for her who informs me she filed for divorce. This was a total shock. I wasnt even given 24 hours to come up with a response about the things she wanted us to work on to figure out our marriage.

She moved in with a friend who has convinced her of so many things to get this divorce. It is truly heartbreaking. This woman was my everything, my best friend, my soul mate. I failed at times as a husband and did not see that I was not there for her the way she needed at times, but the marriage was great 99% of the time I had thought. I lost my job back in October when I stayed home to take care of the kids while she was sick and needed to go to urgent care. I always did everything I could to give her the best life.

How do I move on? I have no closure. No idea why she just decided within 24 hours to get a divorce after telling me she wanted to work on things. She and her family are big Christians and it is truly mind boggling her first thought was divorce. I just want answers. I wanted to work on things and be with her. Now she is treating me like we are strangers except for pick ups and drop offs with our kids. Like none of the last almost 10 years meant anything at all. It hurts me to my soul. I dont even want to think about dating another woman again after I lost the one that was my forever.

Sorry for the long rant. Needed to say something somewhere.