How do you survive on your own?

captainchippsixx · 2024-08-02T18:26:24+00:00

If you have Little left and can pay everything hats off to you man! How are you going to handle 2 little ones? I assume your the full time worker and is she stay at home?

You definitely can get by with 1 bedroom when they are little, if they sleeping over.

When kids are old enough- play ground playground playground They love it.

Slow_Complex9685 · 2024-08-02T16:32:19+00:00

This post strikes a big fucking nerve with me. Rant (and it might cause some backlash): It's utter fucking bullshit it's allowed to happen. Our quality of life takes a huge shit and it seems impossible to get it back making the money you currently are, or was. I'm living it. Basically finding the need to bring in a roommate for the first time ever, living off of what little I can afford on groceries, bdays and holidays will be terrible, utilities will be reduced slightly, other expenses remain the same, etc, etc. roughly 60% of my income is gone. I am weighing taking a lesser paying, less demanding job. Because the amount I make is too much apparently. My advice to young people contemplating marriage is think twice. If you must- save for a divorce, never advance professionally, don't advance academically, don't try to make a good amount of money busting your ass for however long, reconsider having kids, start living frugally now, have your own bank account and NEVER a joint account, reconsider purchasing a home, land, etc., do not give them the option of being a stay at home parent, and so on. I understand not every situation is like mine. I support a lot of kids. Im fucking livid this can happen though, utterly hate the system and how they can financially r*** us. Only advice I would give is to adjust your lifestyle. Dollar stores, hell in your case maybe apply for assistance, food pantries? Save all that you can now. Find free, or very inexpensive, activities to do with the kids. I take mine for walks, hikes, playgrounds, free functions in and around town, etc. I know It's bullshit to have to hear it and a very tough pill to swallow.

Good luck to you.

Strict-Front-2375 · 2024-08-02T01:41:41+00:00

I barely did. Was laid off day after she left, she drained bank account on way out, and every scrap of money we had went to her to keep out house with a 2.75% interest rate.

For the better part of two years I had literally zero money, spent nothing on anything, and ate pasta for dinner every single day.

Eventually was able to get back to my old salary, and have a comfortable amount left over. Retirement is entirely shot, but I guess I'll worry about that later

pk2at · 2024-08-01T20:19:50+00:00

Instead of the dumb ideas in the comments, look for a lower paying job, take a sabbatical from your current one, apply for CS reduction with the lower pay and move back to your current one.

MonarchistExtreme · 2024-08-01T18:43:27+00:00

I live in a major US city on the west coast so public transportation is an option. I gave up owning a car. It's the only way to comfortably support my son and I in this city. It does suck losing that freedom but for many reasons we can't move right now and I don't want a roommate just to afford owning a vehicle.

No-Spinach9411 · 2024-08-01T18:03:12+00:00

Most people don't. They remarry or shack up quickly for this very reason. Men and women both.

potatotornado44 · 2024-08-01T14:41:37+00:00

I moved to a more affordable area of the country. There was nothing else I could do.

I wouldn’t have been able to afford child support and a place of my own. My parenting agreement states no overnights with non-family members, so roommates are out.

My apartment where I’m living now is $1000 less a month than it would be where I’m from, and I can now afford to travel once a month to see the kids while still having some money for myself.

Shit situation, but I didn’t choose these circumstances. Doing the best I can to keep in touch with my daughters. Hopefully one day I can move back, hopefully when they become adults they’ll understand

As the late Tupac said, “I was given this world, I didn’t make it.”

KillerUndies · 2024-08-01T13:29:03+00:00

Donate plasma if you can, something I started doing.

whoisgodiam · 2024-08-01T12:00:15+00:00

Just live at your dad’s house forever lol

Exactly65536 · 2024-08-01T10:32:04+00:00

Buy used stuff: toys, crib, bicycles, etc. Buy cheap clothes - not Nike sneakers, but noname whatever. Don't plan going to a shopping mall as a weekend activity, go to a free playground or a park instead. If your car is expensive, sell it, pay the loan, get a cheaper one - of course, if that's a possibility from financial standpoint. Rent smaller apartment, one person doesn't need 2 bedrooms; alternatively, have a roommate. Exercise at home or run in a park, gym is for the rich.

upvotersfortruth · 2024-08-01T09:55:31+00:00

stay at home until they kick your ass out
use the extra time you don't have the kids for your side-hustle
these are the cheap years for the kids, read to them and play in the parks

Exactly65536 · 2024-08-01T10:32:04+00:00

Buy used stuff: toys, crib, bicycles, etc. Buy cheap clothes - not Nike sneakers, but noname whatever. Don't plan going to a shopping mall as a weekend activity, go to a free playground or a park instead. If your car is expensive, sell it, pay the loan, get a cheaper one - of course, if that's a possibility from financial standpoint. Rent smaller apartment, one person doesn't need 2 bedrooms; alternatively, have a roommate. Exercise at home or run in a park, gym is for the rich.

Title	How do you survive on your own?
Author	tempussecundus
Upvotes	6
Comments	28
Date	August 1, 2024 8:50 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1ehbtnk/how_do_you_survive_on_your_own/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/how-do-you-survive-on-your-own.1525987 https://theredarchive.com/post/1525987

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