Losing friends in separation/divorce

67Luck · 2022-12-24T06:46:23+00:00

One thing about divorce- you’ll find out who your true friends really are. If everyone bails on you - they weren’t worth your time in the first place.

Small_Quarter_3673 · 2022-12-24T07:30:58+00:00

If your other friends are married they will do what their wives will tell them that's why they are still married. Make some new friends that don't remind you of your past. Go do new things. There are plenty of meet up groups

freeagent2120 · 2022-12-24T07:24:37+00:00

Had a huge circle of friends pre split. That circle got narrowed down to only one of the original group. Good news is I am now able to choose with whom I socialize with without being chastised. Embrace it

dday_throwaway3 · 2022-12-24T08:58:42+00:00

> one of my biggest fears is losing some of my best friends to my wife

Those people were never really your friend if that happens.

1Cobbler · 2022-12-24T07:37:02+00:00

Luckily me and my wifes social circles were different. It surprised me still when not one of hers bothered to touch base with me after she left.

RippedOffFather · 2022-12-24T12:27:56+00:00

Maybe I’m just cold hearted at this point, but why do you care about “friends”? If someone can’t change what you eat, what you drive, where you live, why do you care? The same way you met them, you can meet other people. It’s not that big of a deal.

“You should love your enemies, and hate your friends. Because friends come and go, but enemies stay the same.”

That’s the mantra I use. I view everyone as an acquaintance until they show me true devotion and make it into the friendship realm.

Edward189181 · 2022-12-24T12:23:53+00:00

As small quarter says, the ones that are married will do as their wives say. It's exactly what's happening with my group of friends at the minute. Women tend to side with women regardless of the circumstances. Just let them get on with it, and count your blessings that life gave you the gift of naturally filtering out people who would never have your back. It hurts for a while, but you get through it.

reddit_1999 · 2022-12-24T16:46:46+00:00

Was hanging with group of maybe a dozen couples before separation with wife. Post separation literally ONE guy has contacted me to see how I am and try to hang out. What a wonderful feeling, especially around the holidays, and especially when you have no family. /s

rhett342 · 2022-12-24T05:50:15+00:00

Don't ask me for advice. My wife and I shared one friend from before we ever even got together. They were even maid of honor in each other's weddings. I've tried texting her since my wife and I separated but never got a response. It sucks because she was a really good friend of mine but then again, so was my wife and I lost her too.

CaliDude75 · 2022-12-24T05:57:28+00:00

My wife hardly had any friends outside of her family. I think most of my friends knew our marriage was troubled before I was willing to admit it.

Although I moved out-of-area from where I’d lived for the last 16 years, I’ve stayed in touch with most of my friends, and went back down to the area recently. I consider myself an introvert, but I make friends more easily than my wife.

No_Analyst_5235 · 2022-12-24T18:32:53+00:00

Regardless of what happened during the relationship, during a divorce a woman is treated like a super hero . Cheered on by all. The you go girl , you found your voice crowd. The guy gets looked at like he did something wrong or he has leprosy. I went through that with a small circle of friends we had . There was only one couple we were close to that I could call friends and he kept in touch . The others were opportunistic and fair weather friends so she could have them . She hated them anyway.

She ended up losing my whole family and now only has the users . She has tried to reach out to my family but they want no part of her. I’m sure she didn’t expect that to happen but she made her bed

playerknowmore · 2022-12-24T22:35:11+00:00

I associate with a lot of people, but honestly, I only consider myself having one friend. He feels like a brother.

I also have military friends I haven't seen in years. They always have a place to stay when they are in town, and someone to talk to if they need me.

Suspicious-Berry3330 · 2026-02-12T03:51:04+00:00

Honestly, they aren't your people if they don't stick by you after the divorce. My counsellor said to Ariana Grande them "Thank you, next" after my divorce/friend struggle.

Title	Losing friends in separation/divorce
Author	DocumentOwn690
Upvotes	13
Comments	28
Date	December 24, 2022 5:18 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/zu2j5h/losing_friends_in_separationdivorce/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/losing-friends-in-separationdivorce.1145897 https://theredarchive.com/post/1145897

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