I went on a date for the first time in months earlier this week. I concluded very early into it that I would not be seeing this guy again, and he sure didn't redeem himself as the date progressed. While some things he said/did were worse than others, all required "reading between the lines."

  • I walk into the restaurant, where he's sitting at a table (it was counter service). After dodging an attempted first-date hug (I hate when guys try to do that), I say something like "shall we order?" He says "yes, are we masking?" I responded "of course!" so incredulously lmao. Like we're going to be interacting with the staff, dude, it'd be such a dick move not to.
  • When we ordered he said "I've got this" re: paying. I guess I'm glad he didn't try to split it, but a HVM wouldn't even bring it up imo.
  • I noticed on the payment screen that he didn't leave any tip. Not even a crappy one. We all know it's a NVM move to be outright rude to wait staff when talking to them, but not valuing their labor is also LV in my eyes.
  • Shortly after our food arrived and we started eating, he went up to get water. I had tea, but he didn't offer to get me a cup as well. Truthfully, water would've been nice, but I wasn't going to ask. If I'm out with a friend and I go to get water, I'll either ask if they want some or just bring back two glasses! Again, this is fairly small, but should've been a no-brainer. (I actually thought while sitting there that if a guy won't think of you in that situation, there's no way he's going to try to make you cum! lmao)
  • It came up that he stays in touch with his exes. Nope!
  • At some point we were talking about public transit and he said something like "maybe a rating system for riders would make more people willing to use it, like if you're a 4/5 stars you can get on." This idea of attributing a quantitative value to human beings absolutely fucking shocked me. Especially for a public good. I went off lmao but yeah, similar to the tip issue, this struck me as super elitist and devoid of empathy.

I think there were more but anyway, I'm sharing this because I'm proud of myself for noticing all of these and to remind fellow queens (especially those newer to FDS) to keep your eyes wide open! Don't let men get away with any of this shit, not even the smallest things! And definitely be aware of how a man talks about other people.