Young Brothers. I'm an older man who's been around. I'm no catch, but have had several long-term (1 year or longer relationships).
Please take this seriously.
When dating, it'll be extremely easy to fall into the "velvet trap." The first 3 to 6 months of an "exclusive" relationship is so viscerally intoxicating, we, as men, often don't even realize what's really happening.
You see, that first 3 to 6 months, the woman you're having sex with will be so CONVINCINGLY, BEHAVIORALLY LOVING, you'll not fully realize what's happening WITHIN YOU...how IMPRINTING this is in your psyche.
She's BEHAVING in such an affectionate manner (freely giving you hugs and deep kisses ), is very sexually receptive (receptive to your amorous sexual advances), and appears to be fully accepting of you ("I love you as you are"), you can become completely and utterly hooked. BUT, SADLY, IT'S ALL TEMPORARY.
This brief, blissful period of seemingly loving behavior she's exhibiting is not what you think it is and more important, IT'S FLEETING. IT NEVER LASTS. AND, MOST IMPORTANT, NO MATTER WHAT YOU TRY TO DO AS A MAN, NO MATTER HOW DESPERATE YOU ARE TO TRY AND GET THAT LOVING BEHAVIOR BACK FROM HER (that made you fall head over heels), IT...WILL...NEVER...HAPPEN...EVER.
But, you, predictably, will want to believe YOU CAN GET IT BACK. You will WANT TO BELIEVE YOU CAN SOMEHOW GET IT BACK. YOU'LL TRY AND CONVINCE YOURSELF, "THIS TIME IT'S DIFFERENT!"
You see, in that brief period of bliss...that first 3 to 6 months, we can fall so deeply for women, it's unreal. That brief period of highly charged sexuality can often make us BOND with women in visceral, psychological, primal ways we'll never fully understand. Then, when she later changes and starts withdrawing and withholding that loving BEHAVIOR, we can become desperate, and quite often, will do almost anything to try and get it back. We're hooked. We will lie to ourselves and do crazy, self-destructive, dangerous shit...up to, and including throwing ourselves right "under the bus" of marriage.
Psychologist John Gray had it right when he said, "the way to a man's heart isn't through his stomach, it's through his penis."
Open your eyes young Brothers, be careful, educate yourselves to understand what's happening TO YOU AND WITHIN YOU that first 3 to 6 months with her, and constantly remind yourself, that this brief period of behaviorally loving, sexual behavior from her NEVER, EVER LASTS, AND YOU WILL NEVER GET IT BACK.
Protect yourselves, and act accordingly
[+][deleted] [recovered] (124 children) | Copy Link
My ex did this for 2 years then she said no more sex until marriage. I told her I miss our amazing physical intimacy and asked if she missed it to. She told me no she doesn't need sex. I asked if it's because I'm bad at sex? She told me her best sex was with her first, her best love was with her second and I'm her sixth lover.
I was floored, that wasn't what I asked. I never asked where I rank among her exes nor did I ask who her best sex or love were, it's like she was trying to psychologically torment me by telling me I will never be better than her exes. What other things would she tell me to make me feel inadequate? I didn't feel very special anymore and felt like she was trying to manipulate me into marriage and punish me for not marrying her sooner.
[–]gundahir123 points124 points125 points (33 children) | Copy Link
[+][deleted] [recovered] (23 children) | Copy Link
I just keep thinking, you waited 3 years to tell me this or you're just telling me this now to hurt me so I break up with you?
Women are fucking nuts. Yet she will still invite me over and cook for me (but no sex) in hopes I will marry her. So fucking done.
[–]MonMag 31 points32 points33 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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tell her she is your 9th string side bitch and you think her cooking tastes like ass (ironically then she will fuck. smh)
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haha, only thing is her cooking is fucking amazing and I'm going to miss it, authentic Vietnamese cuisine
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yes
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the shit women say is the ultimate red pill
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Originally she was one of five plates. I upgraded her to LTR and got rid of the other four plates because she started coming over and cooking food for me every day and fucking me whenever I wanted. Should have kept her as one of my five plates.
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Ultimate soyboy thinking.
Of course the past matters, and not just sexual history. Everything you did in the past defines who you are as a person right now.
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you're right. I broke my own rule of "if you're not fucking me, you're probably fucking someone else"
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Yep, exactly.
She even told me, "my body, my choice if I don't want any more sex until marriage".
This is from a girl who grew up in Vietnam with nothing and came to the US at age 13. Had no electricity and used oil lamps at night, watched TV by looking through a neighbors window at their battery powered TV, had a radio at home that was battery powered and had to take it into town every so often to get it recharged, used mosquito nets at night. The bathroom was an outhouse and she and her siblings helped out on the coffee bean farm. 25 years later she's an Americanized cock carousel rider trying to pretend she's a tradcon to trap a beta bux.
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So she's 38? Am I reading this right?
If so, that is way beyond marriage material. Her ship sailed long ago...
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Yes. She's asian and works out so looks younger than average American. Her carefree joy and smiles are gone and replaced with resting bitch face and "I want to get married and have kids before 40" and "this relationship isn't going anywhere" nagging entitled mindset
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Dude, fucking run. Forget about that post wall cunt, no matter how good she looks for her age and focus on yourself.
If she wanted marriage and kids she should've focused on that at least 10 years ago instead of riding the carousel. Nothin but misery and pain awaits you if you wife her up.
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You give them what they want (marriage) and they still find a way to fuck everything up. Women don't even know what they want.
Hate the entitled and ungrateful mindset. At least you dodged the child support/alimony trap.
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That was back December. She still wants me to marry her. I've distanced myself from her. Moving in 5 months to start grad school and should probably be a man and end it and block her. Hurts how woman can make you feel amazing then pull the rug out and act like nothing changed.
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you're right. She's smart enough to get her nurse practitioner degree yet she says things that makes me realize she is damaged goods and definitely not marriage material let alone LTR material
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good point, should taken my own advice. Told her when she started withholding sex that if I wanted to wait until marriage to have sex then I'd rather marry a virgin. She looked like the wind was knocked out of her.
http://socialpathology.blogspot.com/2010/09/sexual-partner-divorce-risk.html
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So what happened?
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It's like trying to detox from heroin. I felt amazing during those two years and would love for things to return the way they were but the things she told me just kills the joy.
She still texts me occasionally to come over to eat and she wants me to marry her. This week she wanted me to fly to where she was visiting her parents so we could elope. Her words: "it would be the craziest thing I've done in my life, I will cry tears of joy if you fly over here and cry tears of sadness if you don't".
I will be moving away in 5 months to start grad school after which I'll be making bank (income will go from $50k to $180k per year). Need to just be a man and end it and block her.
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You're right. My first mistake was cohabitation. I wanted to leave the moment she said that but couldn't because we lived together. So I chalked it up to mood swing/hormones but also started looking for my own place.
Finally got my own place in January and can finally properly punish the continued bad behavior by going no contact and not giving her any more of my time.
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Was living with her at the time so couldn't punish bad behavior by walking away. Finally have my own place now so I can ghost her. Fucking women and their mind games.
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Everything you listed is caused by genetics or outside influences / hormone levels in your body, past experiences, etc.
Morality is mostly learned, you'd have a completely different set of morals if you were raised differently.
Reduce the level of some chemical in your brain and you might be too unmotivated to start learning another language or get out of bed to go to work in the morning.
If your brain was wired a bit differently, you might choose a completely different field of study because your interests are changed.
It's all causes and effects, there is no such thing as free will.
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Yup, this is why I lol @ men who say male "love" is somehow selfless or more pure than female "love." In both cases, the person is a drug addict seeking a drug from another person. Men are just way more addicted, so they are willing to trade away their lives for pussy. This does not make male love selfless, it makes male love retarded, especially compared to women, who use love as a means to survive.
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how many men have sacrificed their lives to save the ones they love? and how many women?
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To deny free will is to deny agency, accountability. You’re talking nonsense.
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mgtow is not free will, it's literally a reaction to pussy being too expensive.
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9 months.
The attraction lasts 9 months for a reason (pregnancy).
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Men aren't waking up.
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Too bad everyone hates themselves now.
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Agreed. I’ve always found myself bored and uninterested with relationships after 9 months to a year, with most ending around that time and figured there was some biology at play there.
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Thanks to smartphone and social media, everyone is obsessed with short term instant gratification. If something doesn't give immediate pleasure, people want nothing to do with it.
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