r/amitheasshole calling men insensitive when he was just minding his own buisness

Florence_Fae · 2021-04-19T12:08:26+00:00

AITA is a cesspit, if you’re a man on that sub 99% you’re the asshole just for existing.

This one is particularly irritating though, are men just not supposed to walk around anymore and give preferential treatment to women just for being alive?

Stupid bullshit through and through.

mr-logician · 2021-04-19T10:27:16+00:00

He shouldn't have to stop walking or apolgize when he did nothing wrong just to cater to her irrational fears.

Cordero_Biggs · 2021-04-19T13:36:01+00:00

I love how they go straight to "red pill" when someone says "fuck her. You don't owe her anything".

Vista_Seagrape · 2021-04-19T13:48:16+00:00

AITA is a very sexist sub, I've seen posts where abusive women are supported, and men are blamed for not liking abusive behavior from their partner.

Aphinoo · 2021-04-19T16:12:49+00:00

NTA...but insensitive.

Women have to be constantly on guard for the kind of behavior you were exhibiting. Yes, you had a right to walk home, just as she did. But she needed to feel safe doing it and you weren’t contributing to that. You could’ve been aware she could perceive you following, even if you weren’t, and altered your pace, even taken a break to allow her to put distance between you, thereby making her feel safer. When confronted, you could’ve told her you live (here) and were just walking home, then added, “I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable.”

So maybe just a little more thought about how other people perceive (right or wrong) your actions may help you in the future

So he's supposed to wait longer just so someone felt safer, when that could've put him in danger of even more things worse than rape... That fucking gall to act like he should have to pay for her irrational fear of men is disgusting.

Throwawayingaccount · 2021-04-19T16:14:57+00:00

Replace "man" in the given scenario with "black".

OP is NTA. Hopefully replacing man with black indicates why the woman is in the wrong. She is assuming, just because of an immutable trait, that OP was a bad person.

SC2sam · 2021-04-19T16:19:49+00:00

"with what happens to women on the street"... yeah we should all feel bad about the overwhelmingly lower rate of assault, murder, robbery, etc... women have when compared to men. I have no idea how these women feel "unsafe" when walking on the street but it's pretty much always a personal problem of theirs and doesn't reflect reality in any way.

FlatTire2005 · 2021-04-19T15:25:29+00:00

I like how one of the comments is like “MRAs are dumb, they don’t even know redpill is an allegory for the Wachowskis being trans”.

Okay cool, but you’re assuming that MRAs are inherently transphobic and would avoid anything anywhere close to related to transness. I don’t give a shit if someone is trans when they have a good idea or accidentally create a phrase.

It’s like calling “the libs” stupid for using incel as an insult. 1) It’s just as bad as calling someone a virgin, slut, whore, whatever and 2) Don’t they know it was originally created by a woman because her medical issues prevented her from having sexual activity? So are the people who they call incels actually powerful women who deserve all the respect?

No, because (most) people have brains and understand context and meaning. Redpill is “waking up” to whatever. For the Wachowskis, it was waking up or coming to terms with or telling the story of how they were trans. For Neo, it was finding out the world was a simulation. For MRAs, it’s noticing that society will always bend over backwards to help a woman or defend her or give her special treatment while men get fucked (Draft, alimony, custody, linger sentencing for the same crimes, etc.) Notice how I didn’t mention a single social issue. These are laws on the books in black and white that are still used today.

flowerpassion2112 · 2021-04-19T14:37:28+00:00

So you’re complaining about basic people being basic? On Reddit?

hoiblobvis · 2021-04-19T15:31:33+00:00

so if that person is correct i need to wait a while if a person of the female gender is even 100 meters near me bcotherwisw she would be uncomfertable

EvilLothar · 2021-04-19T16:58:03+00:00

And now go in there and post the same thing, but instead of it being a man following her, it was a black woman. And she just didn't feel safe having a black person following her.... and watch the heads explode and the mental gymnastics.

TheWorld_IsntHere · 2021-04-19T19:09:47+00:00

"...But she needed to feel safe doing it and you weren’t contributing to that...thereby making her feel safer. When confronted, you could’ve told her you live (here) and were just walking home, then added, "I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable."

absolutely not. there's a difference between making someone uncomfortable on purpose, and just doing your own thing (like OP was doing). the fact that commenter is implying you have to do a bunch of things to make that women "feel safe" is ridiculous, especially since said woman is a literal stranger, you're literally not supposed to care about their feelings.

stop valuing the feelings of random women so much, and move on with your day.

GulchDale · 2021-04-19T17:54:12+00:00

This shit drives me crazy. Black lives matter, up until I'm going the same route as a woman. Then I don't matter, all what matters is the feelings of the racist, misandrist Karen who thinks she owns the street and I should be inconvenienced.

Throwaway_Old_Guy · 2021-04-19T20:05:26+00:00

Am I the only one that is bothered by Women that are deliberately distracting themselves (headphones in or fully engaged with some random electronic device) while out and about?

I see it every day. A Woman out for a run with earbuds, or walking with their head down looking at a phone, or engaged in a conversation.

By doing this, they are taking away their own situational awareness, and making themselves more vulnerable.

Is it my duty or responsibility to make them aware of it?

skymonstef · 2021-04-19T19:56:47+00:00

My 2 cents her reaction is foolish but if that's what they are being taught then ehhh as others point out altering your route or doubling back is the easiest way to see if someone is following you

His reaction totally fine.

rahsoft · 2021-04-19T20:43:39+00:00

not really surprised, especially with some of the "fantasy fiction" crap that the commenters buy into over men's rights, and red pill.

AITA is just an echo chamber where Feminsts run to in order to justify their behaviour and their "fictional" view of the world, whereby the rest of the human race have to live in reality.

they are very much like the AITA roommate from hell who has no empathy, no self awareness and no ability to live among others as an adult rather than the antisocial infantilised children they are...

LegendaryEmu1 · 2021-04-20T01:35:06+00:00

How stupid, and he caved too.

You shouldn't cater to people's irrational fears. As a very large man, i am just intimidating to people in general, gender doesn't matter. I once saw an entire muslim family down the street after seeing me. I was carrying groceries back home at the time.

I couldn't have done a damn thing to make them more comfortable, and why would I? They viewed me a certain way, I did nothing to warrant it, they made a snap judgement for whatever reason.

The same way if a woman just assumes you're doing something against her just because you're around? Thats on her. If she doesn't know you, has no reason to suspect you aside from her irrational fear, thats her problem, not yours.

Even statistically, every metric says shes much safer from strangers than the man she accuses of following her.

MAMBAMENTALITY8-24 · 2021-04-20T08:11:23+00:00

Nta. You dont owe her shit

johnboycutter · 2021-04-20T10:08:26+00:00

How much money are you guys willing to bet that if he had said "me, 28yo black man" everyone would have defended him and called the woman a racist piece of shit?

Catcrumble · 2021-04-23T13:20:32+00:00

Happened to me once when I was about 15-16. I just looked at her and said "not with a 10 foot barge-pole" and pushed right past her. I'm still not sure if she was relieved, or devestated.

Electronic_Ad_3559 · 2021-04-19T16:50:02+00:00

I don’t think he was being insensitive, but I don’t entirely blame the women either. It was logical for her to get angry and scared at getting followed (especially because she was wearing headphones which isn’t a very smart thing to do if your walking home alone) and he was logical for getting mad at her for suddenly yelling at him.

Safwan_stark · 2021-04-21T11:59:22+00:00

This is so stupid it's unbelievable if a girl was actually attacked in the streets it's most likely men that will come running (and risk their life) to save her, women would never do that.

AbysmalDescent · 2021-04-21T19:16:23+00:00

Right, because it's men's responsibility to be sensitive to the delusional fears and prejudices of sexist women.

Title	r/amitheasshole calling men insensitive when he was just minding his own buisness
Author	mr-logician
Upvotes	266
Comments	71
Date	April 19, 2021 10:25 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/mtxnho/ramitheasshole_calling_men_insensitive_when_he/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/ramitheasshole-calling-men-insensitive-when-he-was.830496 https://theredarchive.com/post/830496

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